Chapter 34 New awareness

Chapter 34 New awareness


I must have dozed, because the next thing I knew, the door opened and closed quietly. I felt him before I saw him. That new awareness, that hum beneath my skin.

"Council meeting went well?" I didn't open my eyes.

A pause. Then: "How did you know it was me?"

"I felt you. Like a pull in my chest." I opened my eyes. He stood by the door, watching me. "Is that the bond?"

"Yes." He crossed to the bed, sat beside me. "It'll get stronger. More defined. Eventually you'll be able to feel my emotions, my location, even my thoughts if we work at it."

"That's terrifying."

"Tell me about it." But he was smiling. Actually smiling.

I sat up, letting the blanket fall. I was still naked beneath it. His eyes tracked the movement, darkened.

"The meeting?" I prompted.

"Long. Boring. Full of people who wanted things I couldn't give them." He reached out, traced the line of my collarbone. "I couldn't stop thinking about you."

"What were you thinking?"

"That I wanted to be here instead. That I wanted to come back to this bed and find you still in it. That I wanted to do this." He leaned in and kissed me. Soft at first, then deeper.

I pulled back. "I should probably get dressed. Go check on Eira. Pretend I didn't spend the night in the Alpha's bed."

"Probably." He kissed my neck. "In a minute."

"Garrick."

"Anika." He said my name like a promise. "Just a few more minutes. Then I'll let you go."

I should have argued. Should have pushed him away, found my dress, faced the day. Instead, I pulled him closer.

"A few minutes."

He smiled against my skin. "That's all I'm asking."

The fire crackled. The world waited. For a few more minutes, we pretended it didn't exist.

When I finally left his room, dressed and flushed and trying to look like nothing had happened, I nearly walked straight into Calder.

He stood in the corridor, arms crossed, expression unreadable. His eyes swept over me, taking in everything. The direction I'd come from. The state of my dress. The flush on my cheeks.

I braced for hostility. For accusation. For the cold dismissal I'd come to expect.

Instead, he just looked at me for a long moment. Then he nodded. Once. Slowly.

"Eira's looking for you." His voice was neutral. "Patient with a fever. She needs your help."

"I'll go now."

I started past him. His hand caught my arm, stopping me.

"He's different this morning." Calder's voice was low. "I've known him twenty years. Never seen him like this."

"Like what?"

"Calm. Present. Like something that's been wound too tight finally relaxed." He met my eyes. "Whatever happened between you, don't break him. He's been broken enough."

I pulled my arm free. "I'm not planning to break him."

"Good." He stepped aside. "Go. Eira's waiting."

I went.

But as I walked toward the healing house, I felt Garrick's presence in my chest like a second heartbeat. Felt his emotions swirling, complicated and warm. Felt, underneath everything, the steady pulse of his love.

The mate bond. Real and undeniable and terrifying.

I pressed my hand to my chest and kept walking.

Eira took one look at me and raised an eyebrow. She said nothing, but her eyes missed nothing.

The patient with the fever occupied the rest of my morning. Then another patient, and another. The healing house stayed busy, and I stayed busier. By midday, I'd pushed the night before to the back of my mind.

Then Garrick walked in.

He came with a warrior who'd taken a bad cut during training, nothing serious but enough to need stitches. He stood by the door while I worked, arms crossed, expression neutral. But I felt him. Felt his eyes on me, his awareness of me, the hum of connection that wouldn't quiet.

When I finished, he stepped forward.

"Eira, can you manage the rest? I need Anika for something."

Eira looked between us. Something flickered in her old eyes. Knowledge. Approval. Warning, maybe.

"Take her. We're caught up."

I followed him out of the healing house, through the corridors, into an empty storage room. He closed the door behind us.

"I couldn't focus." His voice was rough. "Couldn't think. Couldn't do anything except feel you in the back of my mind and want to be near you."

"The bond?"

"The bond." He stepped closer. "It's stronger than I expected. I can feel you all the time now. Your emotions, your location, the general shape of your thoughts. It's like you're living inside my head."

"Is that bad?"

"No." He cupped my face. "It's not bad. It's just overwhelming. I've been alone so long, and now suddenly I'm not, and I don't know how to process it."

I reached up and covered his hands with mine. "Then don't process it. Just feel it. Feel me. Let yourself have this."

He kissed me. Hard and desperate and full of everything he couldn't say. I kissed him back just as fiercely, pouring my own overwhelming feelings into it.

When we broke apart, we were both breathing hard.

"I can't keep dragging you into storage rooms." His voice was rough. "People will notice."

"Let them notice." I traced his jaw. "I'm done hiding, Garrick. If we're mates, if we're bonded, then let the pack see it. Let them know."

"It's not that simple."

"It is exactly that simple." I held his gaze. "You're Alpha. You make the rules. So make one that lets you have me."

He stared at me for a long moment. Then, slowly, he smiled.

"I love you."

"I know."

He kissed me again, softer this time. Then he pulled back and straightened his clothes, the Alpha mask sliding back into place.

"Tonight. My room.  We'll talk about what this means. About how we move forward."

"I'll be there."

He left. I stayed in the storage room for a moment longer, pressing my hand to my chest, feeling him there. The bond hummed between us, constant and undeniable.

Nothing would ever be the same.

I walked back to the healing house with my head high and my heart full, ready to face whatever came next.