48 - RED

48 - RED
~Hannah’s Point of View~

Red, nothing but red. That's all I see. There’s a thick filter over my eyes and literally it’s all the same color.

There’s otherwise so many sounds of the night. A female screams in the distance, males wail in pain from different directions. But it’s all muffled, it’s all not important. Red tunnel vision for my enemy, that’s all I know right now.

Nothing matters but draining the life from as many enemies as I can with my bare hands. Seeing each take his last breath.

Yet I go to step forward, and can’t. Something outside of me forces me to be still and I fight it with all I have. It’s a pointless fight and I find myself closing my eyes in frustration.

I don’t want to see the red anymore. I don’t want this intense anger inside me.The beast wants it. My throat is hot, my skin is too. Different things seem to hurt though I haven’t been injured. My body is contorting and moving and I can’t control a bit of it.

All these feelings bubble beneath my surface and I’m not sure if they’re mine. There’s still so much about sharing my body with a beast I can’t truly communicate with that I just don’t understand. Couple that with having two mates whose emotions I share, it’s beyond overwhelming. People I still barely know inserting their thoughts into my brain…

I just need … it to stop. There has to be a breaking point and I’m past it. My entire life has been about survival but this is a completely different level. I’m standing over the water, but though I’m not in it, yet … I’m drowning. The totality of it all is hitting me like a damn baseball bat to the gut.

Just as I feel my head clearing a bit, when I think I can open my eyes and not see the rage and anger, a weird minty smell creeps in my nose and a breeze trickles over my skin. I lose my focus and the sounds of a male shouting break my concentration.

I open my eyes to see my enemy in the water, but … he’s not alone. A female stands just on the surface, and I blink a few times to make sure I’m not hallucinating. I don’t recognize her by sight but my beast knows his maker.

When she turns her head to look at me, I see her crystal blue eyes even in the dark still of the night. Even with clouds covering the moon leaving no natural light. They shine like brilliant orbs. Her long blonde hair is pulled up, leaving big but damp waves and strands falling around her shoulders. Her ears are pointy like an elf, her lips full and red with a small button nose and red blushing cheeks. She’s absolutely stunning, a vision of what we’re all led to believe is probably the perfect female.

A quiver dons her shoulder, and my eyes follow the top to see several arrows poking out from her back. Her chest and shoulders are covered in what looks like thick metal plating, heavy armor that follows down her body. Despite everything she’s wearing for protection, she’s barefoot and the visual nearly has a smile pulling at my lips.

When a hand touches my leg, and another my arm, I don’t startle. My body instantly knows the touches of my mates.

I go to speak but my breath hitches, and I remember that I’m still shifted, unable to speak. But the female’s eyes are locked on mine and I feel my mind open to hers.

Rest easy my friend.

Her hand moves swiftly when the male lunges at her, and then she’s holding him up by the throat as his feet kick against the water, trying to find land that doesn’t exist.

His face immediately reddens and I feel hands on my cheeks. Rafe’s voice says something, and when I turn slightly I see Frederick. He’s the one holding my face.

Look away dear Hannah.

I look into his weary and tired eyes, as a tear rolls down my cheek. I will my body to return to normal, I don’t want to be like this anymore. Not right now. I need to be Hannah, I need to remember my humanity. My human hands, feet. Above all, my voice.

A minute later when I finally tear my gaze off my uncle and look back to the water, there is nothing there. I quickly lift my hand to find it human once more, then I’m pulled against Rafe’s chest.

“She came a bit too late…” he whispers, his voice wavering.

I pull back and jerk my head down to see Parker sitting, clearly in discomfort. I fall to my knees and throw my arms around him as tears bloom uncontrollably from my eyes.

“Why late,” I finally ask, a moment later.

“Our father… He didn’t make it,” Parker whispers.

I pull back and gape at him in shock. But the pure torture on his face only confirms his words.

Nightwind is without an Alpha. The Chamberlains without their leader.

I’m not sure why, but I turn back toward the water, then the sky looking for answers. I didn’t exactly love the male, but my mates did. Patricia isn’t exactly my favorite person, but now that I have mates I get it. I wouldn’t wish that pain on anyone.

I turn and stand, suddenly more angry than when my lycan filled my body with its need for revenge.

“How dare you,” I call out, into the dark night.

“Hannah, I don’t think it wise to--” my mother’s words stop when I raise my hand.

“How dare you come here, swoop in at the end of a battle and try to be the hero. My family has barely survived, no thanks to you. How many had to die!! HOW MANY,” I snap, my hands balling into fists.

“Hannah! You can’t say things like that to our Goddess,” Frederick booms.

“The hell I can’t! She needs to answer for herself! How dare she flee one day to save her own skin, and condemn lycans and shifters to a fate worse than death! She condemned us to extinction and I want answers! She created us to serve herself then deserted us,” I seethe.

I have literally no idea if she’s even still here. But why now? Why this moment?

And if she knew shit was going down why not come earlier and spare all these lives? I still don’t even know how many of Nightwind are hurt or worse. But I can’t imagine the Alpha got killed without many trying to save him.

I stare out at the calm pond before me, daring her to come back.

“Damn it! I want answers too! You do owe us! Why leave us here to know nothing but suffering and hurt? Show us all the things everyone else gets to have that we don’t,” my mom snaps, and I feel her hand come around mine. I squeeze it.

Maybe it’s my age, maybe it’s a lot of things. I don’t feel I owe this Goddess anything. Everything I am and how I’ve gotten to this exact moment in my life is because of my blood, sweat and tears. It’s because of my determination not to give up. Not to give in when things seem impossible.

I’ve cheated death more times than I could possibly count. My brothers are only alive because of my hunger, my sleepless nights. I gave all of myself away to them so they could have a decent life. What I hoped was one, anyhow. They never went hungry, though I certainly did.

I took Isaac’s fists, and his kicks. I took the brunt of his schemes and orders. No one will ever, ever have that kind of power over me ever again. Nor will anyone else I care about as long as I have something to say about it.

When a bolt of light flies through the sky, it lands to the right of the pond, and I waste no time spinning and running toward it. I’m not prepared for what comes next. Not even a little bit.

I fall to my knees when I’m roughly twenty feet away … from at least twenty people standing with the female I know is our Moon Goddess.

My jaw falls as my beast calms in a way I haven’t felt. Though I haven’t exactly shared my body with it for long.

“More lycans,” I say, though I don’t know if it is a question or a statement. It’s simply too much shock.

Before I can hold another thought, the Goddess is before me. I get my wits about me enough to realize I don’t want to be on my knees before her. I’m still too angry. But just as I begin to rise, she falls to her knees and reaches for my hands.

“My English is rusty but I’ll do my best. I did fail you my dearest. But like most, I didn’t have a choice. While I may have many powers, abilities beyond a human, I also answer to a higher being. To my father. There is no doubt my punishment for returning to Earth will be severe and it wasn’t easy. I’ve been trying for centuries.

I can’t control much about my own life anymore, but I’m here now, however briefly. What can I do to make your life better? For you and your kind. The biggest threat is no more. It is time for those of you who are left to know peace, to live in peace,” she asks.

Her voice is nearly hypnotizing and I’m hanging on every word. Her accent is certain foreign, but I adore it. But wait, what?

I gulp, and blink rapidly. Is she giving me a wish?

I do know what I would want, but how could I possibly be so selfish to waste it on me?

“Your wish isn’t selfish,” she says, a gleam in her eyes. I gape at her, did she … read my thoughts?

“Yes dear,” she says, nodding.

“Now I don’t know if all the others would want to stay here with your pack but a lot may. I simply had to bring you together so you know you’re not totally alone. Be good to each other, do better than I did. I can’t change what is in the hearts of the wicked, and yes I was too late to save so many but--”

She stops abruptly and stands when a bolt of light flashes in the sky.

When a large male, easily twice the size of a normal human male appears, my jaw falls slack. There’s nearly a glow around him, and it moves as he does.

“Luna, enough of this. I have forbidden you to come back to earth and you’ve defied me. Over fifty children I have to chase after but you… You cause me more grief than all of them combined,” he bellows, nearly making everyone stop breathing.

The aura of authority wafting off him is so damn intense, I’m not even sure I’m allowed to look at him. But I can’t look away. Unlike his daughter’s blue eyes, his are like green crystals. His white beard is long but trimmed, his face is hard and serious.

When there’s still another ball of light barreling through the sky, I’m not sure how much more I can take!