CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
“I couldn't do it, I just…” he groaned into my hair, but I was stuck in my head, wondering how this was possible. How he was standing there in Darius's room with me in my arms after I'd seen him fall.
I was getting too comfortable in his embrace and with fear that Darius was going to come and see us anytime soon, hugging like lovers, I pushed him back.
He closed the door behind him but not before I saw the weird look that nosy guard gave me.
‘Shit! shit! shit!’ I chanted in my head, so many things were going wrong at the same damn time.
“I thought you were dead,” I whispered as he stared at me with eyes that I could drown in. I realized what I'd said and immediately changed my words “Sorry, I meant you collapsed. Are you good?” I asked, reaching out to touch his forehead.
My fingers sank into the dark sweep of his hair. He didn’t flinch, he only drew in a breath so quiet I almost missed it, like a person who’s been waiting his whole life for someone to touch him. His eyes didn’t leave mine, I quickly removed my hands and moved backwards as what I was feeling inside irritated me.
“I like that,” He whispered, bending slightly so I could dip my hand deeper into his dark curls, “Nobody has cared about me in a while.” he added.
I quickly took my hand back and he gave me a hurt look.
Like I'd taken away his favourite toy.
“But the doctors, didn't they-”
“They didn't do anything. There was nothing to do. I faked the fall. Well, part of it. When I saw you and… him,” he growled the last part out, “I wanted to tear everything in my part to pieces and save you from him!”
“Save me? From what?”
“Him! He's not… normal Iris.”
“Wait, go back a bit, you faked your fall?”
“I had to! That bitch just keeps trying to force me into mating with her!”
“Don't call a woman a bitch in front of me except you're using it as a form of praise,” I warned, my tone leaving no room for argument.
“I'm sorry. She's just not getting it.”
“You make it sound like you didn't agree to this in the first place. You rejected me, remember?”
“You don't have to remind me, I know. I fucked up and my wolf loves to replay that memory in my head every night, especially you crying on the ground in pain. But it doesn't change the fact that I still feel this bond more than I have ever felt anything! I feel horrible when I see you with him.”
“Oh you mean you feel jealous when you realize that the mate you rejected for no real reason can be with someone else?I mean, did I give birth to myself? Was it my fault my parents abandoned me in an orphanage? Why was I punished for something I had no control over? And what's worse, you think you still have control over what I do?”
“Of course I do! I allowed you stay with him because you need his help to get better but don't make the mistake of falling for him. He'll never do the same!”
“And you say all of this because you care so much about me,” I sneered.
“Of course I care about you. I stopped that ceremony tonight because I want to give you a chance. It wasn't right what I did back at Wood Creek, I should have given you a fighting chance.”
“What are you talking about?”
“Look, I want you to challenge Mia,” He doubled down on the crap he was spilling. I gritted my teeth till it hurt at every word that poured out of his lips. “Yes I know she's an alpha’s daughter and that makes her more powerful but I'll train you… wait, I won't be able to but Darius and Jake can. And who knows? You might win and we'll –”
“Shut up, just… shut the fuck up you asshole!” I screamed, not caring who heard me. He looked at me like he'd seen a ghost but I was far from done. “You, a heartless Alpha who teaches little children to be murderers, you want me to fight to prove what? That I’m worth your love?” I fired “You want me to fight for what’s rightfully mine? You must be nuts!”
He tried reaching me, but I kicked his hands off me. He looked at me like a wounded puppy with eyes that I detested the fact that I couldn't hate them even though he was treating me like shit.
“No, you're getting it all wrong. I'm not saying you have to fight for my love, but I've already told the Pack she's going to be their Luna and she's been doing so much, winning them to her side. I can't just change my mind, it'll make me look weak. But if you challenge her, fight and win, you'll be seen as the rightful Luna and no one will ever question you again.”
“Right… and if I lose?”
“What?” he stuttered, looking at me with shocked eyes.
“What happens Alpha Lucian,” I breathed deeply, trying to control myself, “if for whatever reason I decide to entertain this absurd crap you're shoving down my throat, and I lose?”
“You won't lose, you can't lose. I don't want to be tied down to her, please help me,” he begged, like a deranged man.
“You really think the worst of me,” I chuckled dryly.
“No Iris, this is the best chance for us to be together, you'll come out of this place and stay in the big pack house. Everyone would worship the ground you walk on, like you very well deserve. All you have to do is save me from – sorry, I mean all you have to do is challenge and win against Mia.”
“Well you're wrong about one thing, challenging Mia isn't the only way out of this. There's another way for you to be very happy, Alpha Lucian.”
“You should call me Lucian but go on, I'm listening,” he replied, stepping closer to me.
I stared up at him, undeterred.
“You've rejected me before and I don't why it didn't work but let's try it one more time, this time around, you'll give me your full name and I'll do it properly.”
“Why will I–”
“Because your pack doesn't need to know you're a weakling. We can just make sure this doesn't get into the ears of more than one nosy guard. Tell me your name, I'll reject you and I'll leave your Pack. You'll finally be rid of me.”
He looked like I'd punched him in the gut as he shook his head.
“Never,” he growled, turning around and walking out of the door.