Chapter 155 155
My body feels heavy when I woke up. My stomach also hurts, so I immediately held it.
"Crescent..."
I slowly opened my eyes when I heard Luca's voice. The light from the ceiling was what I saw. I swallowed because I felt my throat was dry. I closed my eyes again while remembering what happened... Where am I? Why am I here?
The corners of my eyes got hot again, and I held my stomach tightly when I fully remembered what happened... I was bleeding... My child.
My tears instantly escaped from my eyes. Luca's grip on my hand gently tightened when he saw me cry.
"C-Crescent."
I immediately opened my eyes when the door to the room we were in opened. Even though I was weak, I panicked and got up when I saw Aiden come in... That's when I realized that I'm in a hospital right now.
I removed Luca's hand from mine and immediately got off the bed. I immediately approached Aiden and held on to his coat. He held my arm and guided me back to the bed, but I stood my ground and remained staring at him. He just swallowed and looked away from me... My hands are shaking right now.
Luca immediately approached us. He held my arm, but I violently removed it from him. I didn't take my eyes off Aiden.
"A-Aiden, tell me that my child is okay... He-He's still here, right?" I touched my stomach. "P-Please, Aiden... My child is still with me... right?"
"W-What do you mean? Y-You're pregnant?" I heard Luca ask.
I didn't answer his question; I remained looking at Aiden while waiting for his answer... I'm so scared right now. This is the first time I've been this nervous and scared. My whole body is shaking as if it's going to give up any minute.
"I'm sorry. I-I'm really sorry, Crescent... the baby didn't make it."
It feels like my whole body was doused with cold water from what Aiden said. My grip on him loosened, but my eyes remained staring at him. I just shook my head and laughed bitterly.
"T-That can't be, Aiden. I-I can still feel my baby. I-I'm sure my baby is still here... Why are you lying to me?!" My voice completely rose.
"Fourth-week pregnancy is really a sensitive stage... I-I'm sorry to say this... but the baby is gone. I'm really sorry, Crescent," Aiden said, unable to look at me.
My arms just fell on their own as if they lost life. Because of how weak I was, I almost fell, but Luca immediately caught me. I violently removed his hold on me and pushed him with all my strength.
"Don't fucking touch me!" I shouted as tears continuously flowed on my cheeks.
I weakly sat on the bed and sobbed. I held my stomach and repeatedly prayed in my mind that he was still there... But I can't feel him. I can't feel any life inside my stomach.
"I-I can't feel my baby anymore! M-My child!" I sobbed even more because it felt like I was slapped hard... It felt like I had come to my senses.
Aiden sighed and looked at Luca before he went out of the room, as if he was giving Luca and me time to be alone.
"C-Crescent... I-I'm sorry, I-I didn't know--"
I took a pillow and threw it at Luca before he could even get close to me. "Stay away from me! I don't want to see your face! G-Go away!"
I looked at his face; it seems like he's about to cry, but I feel nothing. I can't even feel my love for him... Hatred is the only thing I feel for him right now.
"I-I know this is my fault, Crescent. I-I'm sorry... I'm really sorry. P-Please let me--"
"I don't care what you have to say! G-Go away! I don't want to see you ever again! I hate you, Luca!" I threw a pillow at him again, a blanket, everything I could throw that was close to me until I got tired. I want to hurt him; I want him to get hurt.
"C-Crescent..."
"Y-You don't care, Luca..." My voice became weak. "You don't care about my child and me because you only see Sasha! Don't act like you're hurt because you don't care!" I closed my eyes tightly and sobbed.
I cried my heart out with the only strength that was left in me. I don't know what to do anymore... It feels like a big part of me is gone now... It's like a big part of my being was also taken; it feels like there's nothing left for me.
"G-Give me back my child... M-My child!" I cried out loud; with every cry, I wished that my child would be given back to me. "You're the worst, Luca... I wish it wasn't you! You're worthless! You're an animal!" I used all my strength to shout the intense anger I was feeling at him.
"C-Crescent..." his voice broke, as if he didn't know whether to approach me or not.
"Go away! Get out of my sight, and don't ever show your face to me again! You're an animal! You're so vile! Get out!" I was almost hoarse, but I repeatedly shouted how much I hated him... I want him to feel my anger towards him.
He finally approached me, but I immediately stood up and pushed him. He still tried to approach me, but I just gave him a hard slap. He was stunned, and his cheek turned red from my slap.
"My baby doesn't deserve a father like you, Luca... If there's one thing I regret, it's that I let you be the father of my child! You're fucking disgusting! I fucking loathe you to death, Luca! I hate you... I-I will never forgive you, you animal!" I slapped him hard again. He didn't dodge and just let my palm land on his cheek.
I heard the door open, but I didn't mind it. I remained glaring at Luca while crying.
"Oh my God, Crescent!" I heard Ivana's voice.
She approached me and put me behind her; she was the one who faced Luca... "Can't you see that she's having a hard time because of you?! Can you just leave?! You're just making her feel worse, so please, just leave!" Ivana pointed to the door.
Luca looked at me with his pleading eyes. "Crescent, p-please talk to me when you're ready... P-Please, l-let me make it up to you."
"Please, just get out. Cres doesn't want to see you," Ivana said.
Luca walked to the door with heavy steps. He even looked at me, and it seemed like it was hard for him to leave the room.
I weakly held on to Ivana's arm. I sobbed again and hugged her. I felt her shoulders also tremble, as if she was about to cry. She also hugged me back and stroked my back.
"M-My baby... my baby is gone, Ivana... I should have followed your warnings about him. I-It's my fault why my baby is gone, Ivana. I-I was irresponsible and emotional... My baby doesn't deserve a mother like me. I-It's my fault why my baby is gone. I chose to hold on to Luca instead of my baby... I-It's my fault why he's gone!" I buried my face on her shoulder and cried like a lost child.
Ivana cried with me while caressing my back. "W-What are you saying? It's not your fault, Crescent. P-Please, stop blaming yourself," she muttered.
I don't know how long we stayed like that. She was just hugging me and comforting me with her words, but all of it doesn't seem to work... The pain doesn't lessen. I still can't help but blame myself.
If only my baby had a better mother... he would still be alive now.