Breathe…
Breathe…
Breathe…Ava…
Hot air fills my lungs in a whoosh, and I try not to gasp.
Terror has my insides gripped so tight that my skin wants to flee.
What holds me in place is reality. The past and present combined and those who sacrificed their lives so I could be here.
I have to act normal. Act natural. Don’t giveaway the secret that I’m alive. If I do, I’m dead, and it will all be for nothing.
I know too much. I know what happened that day. I know the evil that was exacted that day, and that alone is enough to kill me.
“Fantastic setup you guys have here,” Dmitri booms with a hearty smile.
It’s the same smile he used when he burned me with his cigarettes while he held me down.
“Thank you. I’m glad you like it, but I can’t take credit. This is all my brother’s doing. He’s creative,” Vincent answers.
Oh God… he knows them. They know each other.
At this point, I don’t know what to think. What to do.
Vincent knows them.
My hands go limp.
Dmitri and Yuri laugh. The laughter comes back to my mind, and my head feels light. My body too, and I’m trying so hard to keep my breathing under control.
The two look at me. I feel exposed.
I look different. My hair was a white blonde back then, like my mother’s, and I was ten years younger. I look a lot different, especially with makeup, but there’s enough of a resemblance if you get a closer look.
“Vincent, you have a very beautiful creature on your arm,” Dmitri says, and my insides tighten up.
He puts out his hand to take mine, and I squeeze Vincent’s side, willing him to not let this man touch me.
Please don’t let him touch me… not any of them.
I pray in those seconds that if there’s any connection between Vincent and I, he won’t allow these men to touch me again.
My heart starts beating wildly in my chest when Vincent shuffles, turning me out of Dmitri’s reach.
He caresses the side of my waist, an acknowledgment of my silent plea, but doesn’t look at me.
“Sorry, I’m Sicilian. I don’t let nobody touch my doll,” Vincent tells him, and Dmitri backs away, thrown by his remark and the glare he gives him.
I’m so shaken I can’t even process that he called me his doll.
“Oh, of course. Apologies, I should have known that.”
“Accepted. Why don’t you go make yourselves comfortable, and I’ll join you when I can.”
“Indeed. We’ll see you later,” Dmitri says.
He glances at me before he goes, and I swear I see some element of recognition dawn in his eyes. Yuri whispers something to him, and they continue on through the archway.
“Bellezza,” Vincent says catching my attention.
When I look at him, he releases me and narrows his eyes while he looks me over.
“Baby, what’s the matter? You’re completely pale. And shaking.” He observes.
I look down at my hand and see that I am indeed shaking. I bring my hands together to try and stop them, but that barely works.
There’s so much spinning around in my head, but the one thing that pushes itself to the forefront of my mind is Vincent mustn’t know what happened to me. No one must know, and especially not him. He wouldn’t want me.
Something registers in his eyes, and he glances to the archway Dmitri and Yuri went through. He stares for a second then looks back to me.
“Ava, do you know those guys?” He narrows his eyes.
“Vincent… can we just go home?” I ask, completely avoiding the question. “Please, can we go home?” It’s the first time I’ve ever referred to his house as home.
If I stay here, I don’t know what will happen.
“Of course, baby, come… let’s go.”
When he slips his arm around me again, I allow myself to feel the safety of him.
Just his touch. His arm around me holding me away from the nightmare.
It’s a nightmare spilled over into reality.
***
He kept his eye on me all the way home, glancing between me and the open road. No questions asked.
He looks like he’s piecing together things in his mind. I just don’t know what. Vincent is not the kind of man to accept nothing as an answer. I’m amazed that he hasn’t asked me more.
We get inside, and he takes me right up to his room, where he sits me down.
The look of him suggests it’s time for questions, and I don’t know what I’m going to say.
I don’t want to talk about it ever. I don’t want to think about it ever. I have to tell him something though.
I didn’t exactly act like nothing happened and I asked if I could go home.
He sits me down on the bed and crouches down in front of me, taking both my hands into his.
“Ava, do you know those men? You look like you know them,” he says. I stare into his deep brown eyes wishing I could truly get lost in his stare.
Like I could jump in and hide there forever.
“I, um… I…” I hate lying to him, but I’ll have to lie again. I can’t tell him any part of the truth. “No… I… don’t feel very well. Can I lie down? Please…”
He just stares at me, his eyes searching mine.
“What’s wrong with you?”
“My head… hurts. If I lie down, I’ll be okay.” I nod and reach out to touch his face.
“Okay. You stay here tonight. I’ll let you get some rest.” He stands up.
“Are you going back out?” I ask.
I’m so scared I can’t breathe. I don’t want him to leave. What if Dmitri and Yuri truly recognized me and had us followed?
“Want me to stay?” He gives me a little smile.
“Yes.”
“Then I’ll stay. I have a few calls to make. Sleep, Bellezza.” He bends down to kiss me like it’s habit then leaves.
The minute the door click’s shut, I allow the tears I’ve been holding back to fall. They fall on a breath I release.
My lungs still feel like they’re on fire. My soul still feels like it’s aching.
I cry so hard I’m shaking, covering my mouth with my hand to keep the sound in.
How did this happen?
Ten years I’ve hidden. I’ve stayed hidden for ten years. Now the monsters are here. Not in Russia where I left them. They’re here, and they know Vincent.
Fuck.
It’s the first time since I made this bargain that’ve felt regret to the point where I can’t think about what I feel for Vincent.
This isn’t just down to coincidence. It’s some cruel joke of fate that’s come for me. Dad got himself in trouble, and all the pieces on the chessboard were played to put me here, right in the line of danger. Right there in the line of fire where I’m exposed.
What am I going to do?
What the hell am I going to do if they recognized me?
That would mean…
Everyone I know is in danger.
Vincent doesn’t know who he’s dealing with.
Or does he?