Chapter 186 187

Chapter 186 187
Howard follows Elise out. Unlike Elise, his face is up and he’s alert. There’s a deep purple bruise around his eye and a bloody cut on his lip. Whatever happened to them, he clearly fought hard. My admiration for the man grows yet again.

“You thought they were safe?” Xena looks back at me, her eyes raking over me so she can eat up every flicker of emotion. She wants me to be shocked, horrified. She wants me to be angry.

I don’t give her anything more than a shrug. “I hoped you’d be lazy and leave them alone.”

“Hm. Maybe you don’t know me well after all.” She grabs Belle and drags her away from Elise and Howard. “Because when it comes to revenge, there’s no such thing as too much effort. I want all of you to die knowing how foolish it was to keep me from what I want.”

I take a step sideways towards my gun. It’s fifteen feet away, at least. But Xena catches the shift.

“I’ll shoot her,” she warns. “Move again, Nikolai, and I’ll shoot her.”

I believe Xena would kill Belle—but the more I think about it, I don’t think she will.

“No, you won’t. Because Belle is the only reason you have any control over me. Without her, you know I’ll have nothing to lose.” I wait for her to argue, but Xena just stares at me. “I fucking knew it.”

I smirk and take a step.

Xena raises the gun.

“I wasn’t talking about Belle,” she says.

Then she turns the gun on Elise and pulls the trigger.

41

BELLE

Since the moment Elise and Howard stepped out of the closet, I’ve been frozen with horror. I thought Iceland was far enough away from Xena to be safe. I thought I’d sent my baby sister to a place where she couldn’t be touched by the chaos I brought into her life.

But I was wrong.

Everything happens so fast and so slow at the same time. Xena raises her arm and that only takes a blurred fraction of a second. Then I hear the bang, and that sound echoes for an eternity. I’m fairly certain I can see the bullet spinning through the air. The striations on it, the way the air slices open to let it through.

Toward my sister.

“Elise!” I scream, reaching for her helplessly. I’m too far away to do anything. It won’t make any difference.

Something else happens, too fast to comprehend. A body moves. The bullet meets flesh.

And when that body hits the floor, Elise is left standing there, completely unharmed.

I only realize I’ve closed my eyes when Elise’s voice breaks through the devastating silence. “Dad?”

Then I wrench them open and see Howard crumbled on the ground.

Elise is kneeling at his side. “Dad?” she says again in a tremulous voice that makes my heart break.

A crimson stain spreads across his chest. Elise presses her palms against the wound to staunch the flow, but it seems to just bubble out of him even faster.

“Help him!” Elise cries out. “Please. Help!”

I want to run to her, but there’s nothing I can do. Nothing anyone can do while Xena is still alive.

“There are other ways to hurt Belle,” Xena says, looking past me to Nikolai. “And when I hurt her, I hurt you.”

She’s talking past me like I’m not even here. Xena just shot at my sister, hitting Howard instead, but it was all to hurt me. And she only wants to hurt me so she can hurt Nikolai. It’s convoluted and it’s messy and, ultimately, it’s all for nothing.

“He doesn’t care about me!” All of the emotions I’ve tried to bottle up are finally bursting out. “Nikolai doesn’t even love me. You’re punishing everyone for a lie you made up in your head. He didn’t love me. He didn’t love you. All of this is for nothing. Don’t you understand that?”

Xena’s lips are pulled back from her teeth, making her look like some kind of feral animal.

“You wanted Nikolai to marry you,” I continue in a ragged pant. “You are hurt that he chose me instead.”

“I wanted Nikolai to give me control of his Bratva,” she corrects, tipping her head to the side like she can’t understand how I could have ever been confused. “And I’m not hurt that he chose you—I’m merely puzzled. Who would want you when they could have me?”

“Anyone with eyes,” Nikolai snarls.

Xena can say what she wants about not carrying that Nikolai doesn’t want her, but I am close enough to see the anger flash through her. Her nostrils flare. She doesn’t even look human anymore.

She is vengeance incarnate.

I can hear Elise weeping over Howard behind me, but I can’t focus on that because Xena is zeroed in on Nikolai. I know this isn’t going to end well.

All of the pain and suffering—it will continue. This feud between them won’t end until we’re all dead or until Xena feels she’s gotten what she’s owed… whichever comes first.

As for me? I’d like to end this death train before it reaches my sister.

That’s all that’s left to care about.

“Kill me,” I say suddenly.

Xena blinks and looks back to me. “What?”

“Kill me,” I say again. “If revenge is what you want, then kill me. I’ll be punished for ruining your plans. And if Nikolai loves me the way you think he does, he’ll be tortured. Win-win.”

But I know better. I know Nikolai won’t be bothered. He can find another woman to fuck, and one day, maybe he’ll even find a woman to marry. Someone he actually loves.

The thought of that alone makes me wish Xena would press her gun to my temple and get it over with already.

“Let everyone else go,” I beg. “Take me instead. Kill me.”

Nikolai roars, “Don’t touch her!”

“Kill me,” I say softly, repeating the words like a mantra. “Kill me. Kill me.”