Chapter 84 84
Lois
The pain in my chest is unbearable. Every breath is a battle, a constant fight between what I know I should do and what I desire with every fiber of my being.
I can’t let them feel this. I can’t allow them to see the storm raging in my mind. I can’t share this pain with Emmanuel and Ezequiel—or with Aidan, wherever he is, whatever is happening to him.
So I close the bond. I block them out. I hide my thoughts behind a wall I build in frantic haste.
I know they’ll notice, but I can’t let them know what I’m really thinking.
This is all my fault. Aidan has been kidnapped. The fight with Alpha Thorne. And now… now the twins have their own family turned against them. All because of me. Because I’m weak. Because I’m not a mate worthy of an Alpha like Emmanuel. I’m just an omega, and I can’t change what I am. No matter how hard I try, I can’t fight my nature that condemns me to always be… less.
I condemned Emmanuel to this myself. When I accepted him, I knew I didn’t belong in his world—nor he in mine. What the hell was I thinking?
Then Ezequiel… and now Aidan. Because of me, he saved me—and now he’s in the hands of vampires, a place he doesn’t know, a place he doesn’t belong.
What have I done?
Emmanuel fled his duty for me.
Ezequiel was torn away from us because of me.
Aidan was exposed because of me.
It’s always been my fault.
Even my parents—their whole lives have been harder because of me. And they’re not even my real parents.
How many people have I already hurt just by existing?
The words in my own mind strike me hard. I’m the problem. I’m the reason they’re in danger, the reason Aidan is in Enzo’s hands. All because I wasn’t strong enough, because I couldn’t protect them—couldn’t even protect myself.
They’ve risked their lives over and over. To protect what?
A mere omega?
I look at Emmanuel and Ezequiel—my mates, my loves. I feel their love for me, their devotion, but I also feel the weight of their sacrifices. They’ve risked everything for me. They’ve left their family, their pack, everything they knew. Emma has given up becoming Alpha… and for what? For an omega who can’t even protect herself, let alone them.
My mind floods with doubt and fear. I know they love me. I know they’d do anything for me. But I also know that if they keep going down this path, they’ll lose everything. And worse—I know that if they reject me… if they leave me… I might die. But that’s the only way out of the path we’ve taken without thinking.
My body would rebel, agonize until the pain consumed me completely. But what other choice do I have? If it’s for the greater good, if it’s what they need to survive, to have the lives they deserve… maybe, just maybe, I should let them go.
I have to accept it—that’s the way out of all this, at least with the two of them. With Aidan, I don’t even know how to help him. I have no idea what I can do for him. I’m nothing. I’m nobody. I can’t even help myself.
The thought tears me apart, but I don’t push it away. I imagine Emmanuel with another mate—someone strong, someone truly worthy of him, exactly as his parents planned. Someone who can stand beside him without the whole world crumbling. Maybe that would fix everything. Maybe if I step aside, if I let them go their own way, everything would fall back into place.
But then reality hits me even harder: I know Emmanuel would never leave me. Ezequiel already left us once—he wouldn’t do it again.
I know him too well. I know that even if I tried, even if I forced it, he would never accept being without me. And Ezequiel… Ezequiel would follow me anywhere. And that’s what hurts most—knowing that no matter how hard I try, no matter how much I want to protect them from all this, they won’t let me.
I feel my strength fading, the weight of guilt and the love I feel for them crushing me. I want them safe. I want them happy. But I know that will only happen if I’m not in the way. And still, the thought of being without them—of letting them go—is unbearable.
Tears slide down my cheeks, but I don’t let them feel it. I don’t let their voices reach me, don’t let their worry breach the barrier I’ve raised. This is my fight, my burden. I have to make this decision alone.
Even so, deep in my heart, I know I won’t be able to do it. I won’t be able to let them go. I won’t be able to sacrifice myself. Because the love I feel for them—and the love I know they feel for me—is the only thing keeping me standing.
But what price are we willing to pay for that love?
I wrap my arms around myself, trying to soothe the pain consuming me. What scares me most is knowing that even if I tried—even if I sacrificed myself—nothing would change. Emmanuel would never leave me. And if something happened to him, if something happened to Ezequiel… I don’t know if I could go on.
I try to prepare myself mentally for whatever might happen to Aidan, but I can’t even think about it. I’m not capable.
I want it all to end. I want this nightmare to be over. But I know it won’t be. Not while I’m here. Not while I remain the cause of all this chaos.
I want to be strong. I want to be worthy of them. But the truth is I’m not. I’m an omega, and I always will be. And no matter how hard I try, that will never change.
What if I die? What if I just… die?
The two of them are strong. I know Aidan is too. They could bear it. They could recover from my death. And at the same time—not everything, but many things—could be resolved.
Emmanuel could accept another mate, accept the Alpha position. Ezequiel could go his own way, reintegrated into his brother’s pack. They would remain as close as ever.
I like to think Aidan would fit into the vampire kingdom—that his world would improve, that he’d realize he belongs there. That he wouldn’t be alone anymore, that the people around him would be like him and welcome him as an equal. He’d never feel excluded again. He’d never have to hold himself apart.
When I picture them without me, everything looks so perfect that it’s painfully clear what I should do.
(…)
Aidan
My hands are bound, raised above my head, while my legs dangle free. I’m completely naked—not a single scratch on my skin—but the cold of the room seeps into my bones. The collar warms me a little; the cold itself doesn’t matter much. It’s been so many hours, and I’m clinging to anything real. Feeling the cold is proof I’m still here.
The last hours have been an endless parade of questions, all asked by that vampire, Misha, who delights in my silence. I haven’t said a word. I’m not going to.
Misha holds a goblet of blood, bringing it to his lips whenever my eyes meet his. He drinks with calculated slowness, savoring every drop while his gaze pins me, assessing every reaction. Finally he stands, hands the goblet to one of his servants—who retreats quickly, footsteps echoing—and leaves me alone with him.
I don’t want to be alone with him. The way he looks at me… unsettles me.
“Why is it I can’t hurt you?” Misha asks, his voice high and grating, like a knife scraping glass. “You haven’t said a single word. You have no intention of speaking. I could torture you… see if you bleed.”
His voice grates against my brain, but I keep my expression blank. Misha is dressed all in black—even his nails. He’s thin, long dark hair falling down his back, giving him an even more sinister air. He moves with a smoothness that’s more glide than step, approaching like a predator stalking prey.
When he reaches me, his cold fingers touch my bare chest, tracing the lines of the tattoos marking my skin. I feel deep revulsion, but I don’t let him see it.
“You think you’re better than us?” he asks, fingers continuing their exploration, as if studying every inch of my body. My instinct screams to pull away, but I’m bound—any movement could trigger something worse.
Misha leans in, close to my lips.
“You stink…” he whispers, disgust thick in his voice. I turn my head aside, trying to escape his nearness, but Misha pins me effortlessly. His strength is superior, but I won’t give in.
I gather all my energy and kick him, trying to drive him back. Misha, quick as a snake, catches my legs and forces them around him, pressing my naked body against his. The contact fills me with nausea.
“When this is over, I’ll make sure to turn you into my whore,” he whispers, so close to my lips I feel his cold breath. “I’ll feed you well, dress you decently, try to earn you a little respect among our kind. I promise you’ll be my pet—after you stop stinking of wolves. I hope it’s not embedded in your skin, or I’ll have to peel it off.”
His tone is mocking, contemptuous, but I know he means it.
My body tenses; disgust and rage boil inside me. With a desperate effort, I drop my legs and kick him in the throat. Misha staggers back, startled, but before he can react the door opens and Enzo enters. I brace myself for the blow, for the pain.
Misha stiffens instantly—his posture, his submissive glance shifting. Enzo’s power floods the room like a tangible presence that shakes me, makes me tremble. It’s no longer just the cold.
“You’re bothering my guest, Misha. Leave,” Enzo says, voice soft but weighted with undeniable authority. That calm appearance is only a deadly weapon. His hand nearly pierced my chest the first time he saw me—I still don’t know why he didn’t kill me then.
Without a word, Misha vanishes, leaving the room silent.
Enzo approaches, his eyes roaming over my naked body, assessing every detail.
I feel inspected like meat. It’s uncomfortable, terrifying—even more than death.
“So, Aidan—are you ready to talk?” Enzo asks.
I stay silent, eyes locked on his. I don’t know what he wants with all this, but I won’t break. Not for him. Not for anyone.
My thoughts race to Lois, to Emmanuel and Ezequiel. I don’t know where they are, but I know they’re fighting—that they haven’t abandoned me.
And that’s what gives me strength.
Enzo stops in front of me, gaze piercing, and waits. The silence stretches, but I won’t move. I won’t speak. I feel the weight of his power, the danger he represents, but I won’t yield.
“Curious,” he says at last, tilting his head slightly. “I thought you’d have started begging for your life by now, Aidan. But it seems you have more in common with wolves than I thought.”
His words don’t touch me; I let no reaction show. Inside, though, a spark of pride flickers. I won’t bend. I won’t give him the pleasure of seeing my fear.
He remains in front of me; this time his collar and mine stay in place. He studies the stone nestled against my chest, but his gaze drifts lower.
“At dawn, we’ll switch collars. Mine was made for me—with my blood. It only works for me. Which means it will hurt you. A lot. At the same time, I’ll know if yours is custom… or if it works for any vampire.”
My jaw clenches at the thought of Lois.
If I suffer, she will too. I have to avoid harm.
“I’ll talk!” I shout. I can’t let myself be hurt—or she will suffer.
“It’s happening anyway—the collar switch. And know this: I can make you talk whenever I feel like it. You haven’t been harmed because Thorne wants to ask you some questions. I thought fear would make you spill everything on your own, but I see it hasn’t. See you later, Aidan.”
His hand comes to my chest, brushing my collar.
I know it hurts him from the grimace on his face.
Something tells me mine only works for me.