Chapter Eight—Swayze

Her day off couldn’t have come at a better time. The first week at the King Ranch had been like a roller coaster on crack. The job itself was easy, a blessing so big she was sure she didn’t deserve it.

On the other hand, being around him was slowly stripping away everything she had tried so hard to hide. He knew something because he had asked her real name. Fear had taken over her, with running being the only solution to stop it.

What would she do if he never gave up? Would she eventually have to leave in the middle of the night in a cab because he started digging?

Swayze figured she’d hang in there, save her money, and get out when the time was right. She had hoped to make a place in Pine Valley, but with the sexual chemistry she felt with Montgomery, it most likely wouldn’t work out.

Sighing, Swayze shifted her weight on the bench at the park as she watched Ryker play in the sandbox with a couple dollar buckets and shovels. It was hot as hell, so they left first thing in the morning on Saturday so they could miss the midday heat.

Swayze watched him dig up the sand and move it to the bucket. How nice it must be not to have a care in the world. Before Swayze knew it, two hours had gone by, and it was time for Ryker’s morning snack. She gathered his things into her bag she’d brought and started walking home with him.

She never knew if the nagging feeling of being watched came from paranoia or an actual feeling, so she shrugged it off because getting Ryker to walk the mile was enough trouble.

When they finally got to their driveway, she noticed her next-door neighbor stood out on her porch, cane leaned against the doorway, palm cupped over her eyes, looking in their direction.

“Hi,” Swayze said. “Nice day, isn’t it?”

Swayze couldn’t remember her name and had only met her once briefly when she moved in. “Yeah, baby, it is. I was comin’ out to ask you if you had been hearing a noise at night?”

Swayze picked up Ryker, swinging him onto her hip. “It’s a raccoon. I saw him in my trash can the other night.”

She shook her head, reaching for her cane. “Those nasty things. Maybe you could ask Mont King to get him, since I assume you two are dating.”

Swayze frowned. “I’m not dating him.”

“Well,” she said, shrugging her shoulders. “He is over here dropping you off every day, so I figured…”

“I work for him,” Swayze corrected her. This was how rumors got started.

“Ah,” she said, fluffing her wild hair. “That makes sense. You should really get you a vehicle. It would be better for the little one. It’s hotter than hell here in the summer.”

Swayze knew that and didn’t need any preaching on getting a vehicle. “Yeah, that would be nice, but I’m a single mom, and that’s out of the question.”

The lady gave her a sideways eye. “The youth today,” she whispered. “That’s why you’re supposed to get married first, then have a baby—people want to jump into bed with people, and it’s just a tragedy.”

Swayze didn’t have the patience to give the lady a lecture on how she had been married, but she did want to give her a lesson on manners. Instead, she smiled and walked them toward her door.

“See you later.”

She didn’t wait for an answer. She led them into the cooled duplex and shut the door behind her.

***

Swayze spent the day with Ryker working on going to the big boy potty, watching Mickey Mouse Clubhouse, and learning their alphabet. She loved her days off with him because she was all he had, his world revolved around her, and knowing she was the best mom she could be helped her get up every morning to fight for him.

With Ryker asleep, her shower and bedtime routine finished, she walked outside onto the front porch to look at the sky. Would it always be this hard? Running for the rest of her life? Sitting down, she propped her feet onto the railing of the porch in front of her.

There were nights she dreamed of having a normal life again. Nights she wished she wasn’t lonely, wasn’t broke or hurting.

“Maybe one day,” she whispered to no one.

The rattling from her trash can made her jump. “Jeez,” she whispered as the salvaging raccoon continued his mission to find half-eaten food. She was sure her trash can was a prize for him with Ryker being the king of half-eaten food.

Perhaps she should take her neighbor’s advice and ask Mont to catch him. She decided to go inside once she felt the seventh mosquito bite and tuck herself into bed beside Ryker.

He stirred but didn’t wake as she snuggled in beside him. She moved his dirty blond hair from his face. She’d never loved anyone as much as she loved her son.

Closing her eyes, she willed herself to dream good thoughts, but in the back of her mind, she felt him trying to squirm his way inside to destroy what strength she had built since leaving.

She’d survive because that was her only choice.

***

What in the…

“Momma! Somebody’s outside!”

Swayze woke to Ryker bent over her on the bed, still sleepy eyed as someone banged on the door. She jerked awake, grabbing Ryker as she raced to the locked door to peek outside.

Montgomery stood on the other side. She sighed, looking back at the small wall clock that read 7:30 a.m. It was late for them to sleep in, but damn it if she hadn’t been enjoying it. Swayze snatched the door open, not thinking about what she looked like.

But she suddenly regretted it, because she noticed what he looked like. Mont’s shirt was plain white but fit his biceps like paint, and even though his torn jeans looked like they’d been through the ringer, he wore them to the point that Swayze felt her body tense.

Dark hair fell to his forehead, but he didn’t push it away. He didn’t move. Montgomery’s eyes were dark considering the light color and the early morning light. He looked hungry in a way she had never seen him.

Then she followed that hungry stare to her bare legs and her T-shirt that hit mid-thigh.

Swayze swallowed the thick lump in her throat and steadied herself. “What in the hell are you doing here? It’s Sunday…and it’s early.”

Mont slowly drug his gaze from her legs up to her scowl, which didn’t seem to faze him. “Taking y’all fishing. I figured Ryker would love it.”

Ryker jerked around on her hip until she let him down to run toward Mont. Traitor. “Ryker wants to go; do you?”

No was her immediate reaction, but the thought of being alone at the house for hours frightened her. “No, I better not.”

“Come on,” he said. “Put some clothes on, and let’s go.”

Swayze bit her lip, looking at Ryker hanging on to his shoulders with a big grin on his face. “For a little bit.”

Mont grinned, putting Ryker down. “Go with ya Momma so we can go fishing.”

Ryker squealed, having no idea what fishing was but excited nonetheless. “But I got ya some boots to wear.”

Swayze glanced at the tiny rubber boots in his left hand, not noticing them before. “No—”

“Since you won’t let me get you anything, I decided I’d get Ryker—my buddy—something because he can’t say no.”

Swayze watched as Ryker grabbed the boots and demanded she put them on. “Let’s get dressed first. Come on.”

She walked toward Ryker’s room, which he didn’t sleep in, noticing Mont still stood at the door. “You can come inside.”

She hurried to Ryker’s room to dress him before she went to get dressed. Mont sat on the couch when she walked back into the living room, Ryker beside him, pointing to different characters on the small TV in the corner. “Is he making you watch Dory?”

“He loves the water, I see.”

“Yeah, he does.”

Mont stood. “Y’all ready to go?”

She grabbed her purse, getting a good view of Mont, not that she hadn’t remembered every detail from the doorway.

“Yes,” she said, grabbing Ryker’s bag. “Ready.”

Mont walked them outside, opening the door for Swayze while Ryker held onto his back for a ride to the driver’s side. Ryker assumed he’d ride in Mont’s lap now.

“I really need to get him a car seat,” she said more to herself.

Mont glanced over. “Has he never had one?”

“Well, yeah, but when we left, I…My neighbor asked if you could catch the raccoon in our backyard.”

She almost told him about abruptly leaving. If he knew she’d left in the middle of the night, running away from her husband’s killer, he’d know too much.

Mont glanced over at her. “Yeah, I can set a trap out for you anytime.”

“Thank you,” she whispered, looking out of the window. She waited for him to ask what she was going to say, but he didn’t. He cranked up the radio to an old Alan Jackson song, rolled down his windows, and started singing.

Ryker laughed, pretending to drive while singing a completely different tune. Her heart hammered at the connection the two had. Everything inside of her screamed that it wasn’t a good idea, but something in her heart said stay.

For a little while, I guess.

***

“All right now, Ryker, cast it out.”

Swayze sat on the bank of a river close by, her flip-flop clad feet resting in the water’s edge while she watched Ryker fish for the first time.

“Wooooooh!” he screamed as the line went into the water.

“Way to go, Ryker,” Swayze said.

“Now, we wait,” Mont said, sinking to his knees beside him. Ryker focused for a couple of minutes, which was more than Swayze thought he would last, before dropping his pole and tossing rocks into the river.

Mont chuckled, taking off his ball cap to wipe the sweat gathered on his forehead. “That lasted longer than I thought,” he said.

Swayze and Mont fell into a comfortable silence while Ryker played by the water’s edge. “What do you like to do for fun?”

The question caught her off guard. She turned to look over at him. Before everything happened, she had liked to dance, scrapbook, and write. It’d all been a hobby for her, but it was something that could take her mind off of certain things.

She hadn’t done any of that since it happened.

“Dancing, I like to go dancing,” she said. “Write in my spare time.” She shrugged, suddenly embarrassed.

“Oh yeah?” he asked. “Dancing, huh?”

Swayze turned to look at Ryker, who ran circles around a small flower wedged between the rocks. “Does that embarrass you?”

Swayze scoffed. “No.”

He grinned. “I think it does. I can imagine you dancing. You dance like a white girl, or a teenage girl with her boyfriend at a school dance?”

“Oh jeez,” Swayze said, hiding her laugh. “Just drop it.”

“Okay, okay,” he said.

“What do you like to do?”

“Ride bulls, mostly. I enjoy a good carpenter project. I like working on the ranch with the animals. Fishing. Hunting.”

“Just a good ole country boy, huh?”

“Nothing wrong with the simple life.”

She couldn’t agree more. Growing up poor, she’d always dreamed of having nice things, but once she had them, she realized it never mattered as long as she was loved and safe.

“Fish!” Ryker yelled.

“Whoop!” Mont jumped up, running over to catch Ryker’s rod from slipping into the riverbank. “Come here, boy! Let’s get this fish.”

Swayze sat up to watch Mont bend down behind Ryker, helping him reel in the small fish that hung from his rod. “Fish!” Ryker began to yell.

The light in his eyes was priceless. “Look-a-there,” Mont said, grabbing the line to show Ryker. “You caught a fish!”

Ryker squinted his brown eyes at the fish and began to point and laugh. “The fish, Momma!”

Swayze stood up so he could hug her waist. “Your first fish,” she said. “Congratulations.”

Ryker stopped to watch Mont put the fish in the cooler he brought along. “No put fish in there!”

Mont looked up at his pouty lips and saddened eyes. “He has to go in the water, see?”

Ryker looked into the empty cooler full of ice and water, finally deciding it was okay for the fish to be in there.

“Another,” he said.

Mont smiled as he cast the line back out into the river. “Looks like you’ve got a little fisherman on your hands.”

“I blame you.”

Mont sat back down beside Swayze, his legs outstretched beside hers. “You have any plans later?”

She gave him a side eye. “I don’t know. Would it matter? You showed up this morning without asking.”

“True, but I thought I’d be nice and ask.”

“No, but I don’t have a babysitter, and I’m not going to dinner with—”

“Hold your horses, Momma. I’m not asking you on a date because it’s obvious our barn date didn’t go too well. I wanted to take Ryker and you riding.”

“In your truck?”

“Nah, on our horses. Ever ridden a horse?”

She’d never ridden a horse before because she’d never had the chance. There had been a period in her youth where she begged her single mom for a horse, but of course, she couldn’t afford one. “No, but I’ve always wanted to.”

Mont nudged her shoulder with his, and she hated that it made her stomach flutter. “Well, today is your lucky day. Let’s let Little Man catch another fish, and we can head on down to the ranch.”

Mont got up to go help Ryker, who banged the rod into the riverbank. It wasn’t a good idea, she didn’t have to think about it to know it wasn’t, but for some reason she felt that letting loose for one day wouldn’t hurt.

Would it?

***

“Easy, she can sense you’re nervous.”

Swayze’s legs were wrapped tightly around the horse’s sides, her fingers tight around the rope Mont had handed her. Could the horse really sense her fear? “I’m nervous,” she whispered.

“You’re fine; calm down. You’ve got her under control. Now tap your legs gently, and she’ll go forward.”

Swayze tapped her heels against the horse, lunging forward as it took off. “Shit! Help me!”

Swayze heard Ryker hollering from the hay bale where he sat with Abigail and Kathryn, watching, but she couldn’t look because she held on for dear life. The horse wasn’t in a full run, but Swayze bounced around like a lunatic until she felt someone grasp the reigns and then the pressure of him jumping on behind her.

“Hey, girl,” he shouted.

Montgomery pulled back the reins, his arms on either side of her as he halted the horse mid-step. The horse slowed to a standstill, and she began to laugh.

Mont’s chuckle from behind her warmed her neck along with his body heat against her. If he hadn’t saved her life, she would have jumped down immediately to get away from him.

“Maybe I should have ridden with you this time,” he said.

Swayze sighed, wiping away the stray tear from her cheek. “I thought I was a goner,” she said.

Mont laughed, hopping off the back. “Nah, girl, I wouldn’t have let anything happen to you.”

She looked down at his green eyes and outstretched hand. He had the same lopsided smile, baseball cap, and smug eyes. How was a man like him single?

Because he wants you.

She shook her head, trying to erase the thought of her wanting him closer to her again. She took his warm hand and let him help her down. She landed with minimal space between them, his breath minty and close to her mouth. Her lips parted, and a small piece of her wanted him to lean down and put her out of her misery.

The sane part said to take a step back.

Ryker ran up to Mont just as her eyes met his, and the fun slipped away from his gaze, a seriousness she’d never seen on him took over. The amount of want and hope inside that moment scared her. The few short moments of what ifs felt like a little slice of heaven. Her imagination carved him out to know exactly what he was doing with his mouth.

“Momma! The horse fast!”

Swayze broke her stare from him. “Yeah, Momma almost had a heart attack,” she said.

Abigail walked up behind them, smiling ear to ear with a squawking Kathryn beside her. “So, you’re definitely not ready for the rodeo.”

“I think she’s better suited for a kid’s ride around the arena on a pony.”

She shot him a look, even though he was mostly right.

“How about you, Ryker? You want to take a ride with me?”

Ryker started pointing toward the horse as Mont grabbed him and climbed onto the saddle. Swayze watched as they started a slow waltz into a run around the far side of the field, Ryker yelling the entire time.

She laughed.

“He is good with Ryker,” Abigail said.

Swayze nodded. “Seems like it, yeah.”

“You found you a boyfriend yet?” she asked.

Swayze gave her a look, which made her laugh. “Just asking. Mont doesn’t seem to hide his feelings for you. Do you not like him? I can tell you’re attracted to him, but why not give him a chance?”

Swayze pressed her back against the hay bale, watching them ride away in the distance. “You’re right. He’s a good-looking man, but—I’ve got issues,” she said. “That no man would want to work through. I’m not here to date. I’m here to start over.”

Abigail turned her head to the side, fidgeting with the end of her braid laid against her shoulder. “Why do you have to do it alone? Why can’t you start over and give Mont a chance?”

Heat began to crawl up her throat. She wanted more than anything to get this off her chest and tell her, but she didn’t. “It’s just better this way.”

Abigail nodded, taking the hint that Swayze wasn’t talking. “But he is cute,” she said.

Swayze nodded. “Yeah, he is. So is Kaden, by the way.”

She got a faraway look and grinned. “Yeah, he wasn’t always like this, I heard at least. Closed off.”

“He has been since you met him?”

“Yeah, I fell in love with him despite the guard around his heart. When he lets it down, it’s amazing. I don’t know, he—he seems like he has lost some of himself.”

“What do you mean?”

“They lost their parents several years back, and I think it affected Kaden differently than Mont. Mont left to get away and move on, but Kaden didn’t. He stayed here and is living in the memory of them. I think that’s why he’s so closed off.”

Swayze looked out at Mont and Ryker on the horse. There was no way their passing hadn’t affected Mont. Maybe he handled it differently than Kaden, repressed the memories? Or hid it?

“But anyway, maybe you should give Mont a chance. I don’t know him well, but he seems like a good guy.”

That was what scared her.