25. Zia's POV - Sweet Delusions Hurt

25. Zia's POV - Sweet Delusions Hurt
Zia 

So I jogged and huffed and made my way up the stairs to the classroom. With the number of stairs we had to climb every day and the number of times we had to climb it, I’m still absolutely surprised as to why I haven’t lost all this weight yet.

As I approach the class, suddenly I feel self-conscious.

The sweat that’s soaked my collar and armpit must be really obvious. That’s why everyone is staring at me. People on the corridor too.

They seem to be fighting to maintain eye contact, before turning to their friends to snicker.

When I get to class, it’s worse.

A concentrated set of judging eyes, including the teacher’s.

"And where are you coming from? Do you think you can just come in and sit here as you wish?" he asked. His gaze lingered a little longer, with a little more hatred than usual.

Wait—hatred?

It was always disgust and unbotheredness that the teachers used to look at me with. Why hatred now?

I cocked my head to the side as the situation felt like a puzzle I needed to solve—that was until he snapped his fingers at me.

"Are you going to remain mute or will you answer my question?"

What question? I furrowed my eyebrows.

"Oh... hmm, I wasn’t feeling too well, I’m sorry," I apologized and lowered my head as the whole school erupted in laughter.

I looked up in confusion at the class.

What was so funny?

Then at the teacher, but he wasn’t in a hurry to scold them, to tell them to stop laughing.

"Just go in and sit down. Don’t disturb my class," he said as I took a step in, my temperature starting to burn from the partiality.

The moment I walked to my seat, I noticed that my chair had been replaced. I have a harmed chair, but the yellow one tucked into my desk was armless.

I glanced around briefly and noticed my chair at the far back of the class.

I could make a quick trip and exchange the chairs, however, the teacher’s gaze was fixed—impatient and full of criticism. The class continued to snicker underneath their breaths, passing papers to gossip and causing the class to be divided, but his gaze was trained on me.

Me alone.

My legs were starting to shake like they couldn’t carry the heavy weight of everyone’s gaze, so I took the chair out, placed my book on the desk, and sat.

Then the class erupted in another round of laughter, some people banging their tables, stomping their feet on the ground. It was deafening and tears stung my eyes.

No, it wouldn’t be the first time people would laugh at me. It wouldn’t be the second either. In fact, I’ve lost count, but the fact that I hadn’t just sat, but crashed into the chair then the ground was what made the tears roll down my cheeks.

I sniffled and tried to get up only to realize that the plastic was stuck in my leg and had drawn blood. The breeze blowing on it made it hurt even more.

My chair had been intentionally replaced with a broken one and they all knew. This was the joke—trap they were waiting for me to fall into.

How? Why?

"Do you need a hand?" I raised my tear-filled eyes to look at my class captain’s outstretched arm as she looked at me with a smile.

But I just didn’t see myself taking that hand. Because the class had gone silent again as if they were waiting... baiting.

"No, thank you, I’m fine," I struggled to get up with the help of the wall instead.

And when I was finally on my feet, she leaned in and whispered, "At this rate, you might end up breaking all the school’s furniture. That’s selfish, you know? We all need to sit as well."

My eyes widened with more tears.

"I will kill them. All of them and feed their bodies to the fishes," Gina’s voice sounded throaty and full of anger, but this time, I didn’t try to appease her.

I willed the anger to fester, because it was the only thing that held me from breaking down right at that moment.

It was the anger that blinded me to what everyone was saying or doing to mock me. Instead, I made my way to the back, limping.

It was as if everyone in the whole school except me was in on a joke—and it hurt.

It hurt so much, I felt ashamed.

I lowered my head, took out my pen, and sat down, unable to push away the feeling that there was something else.

As soon as the class was over, I was out just like everyone else.

Except they all headed to the cafeteria while I went the opposite way to the back of the school.

I felt aggrieved, offended, upset—and despite the fact that Tyler scared me the most, I found myself hastening my footsteps, lengthening my strides just so I could see him as soon as possible.

The faster I walked, the closer I got to our secret spot. It used to be mine alone, but ever since yesterday, I didn’t mind sharing.

When I got there, to the front of the door and moved it to the side, it was silent. When I stepped in and looked around for my third mate, it was still silent. He was nowhere to be found.

"Why?" I cried out. Why wasn’t he here when I needed him the most?

I took in deep breaths in huge gulps as I fanned my face and continued to ask myself desperately as I searched, paced, and waited.

Where was he?

Why wasn’t he here yet? I asked myself this question for one minute, five minutes, then ten, as I sat on the cement chair platform.

Then after another five minutes of waiting, I told myself, "He’ll be here soon."

"Maybe something happened to him? I’m worried," Gina sounded in my head as she for the first time worried for someone that wasn’t me.

I was surprised, but I couldn’t help but agree.

"Let’s just wait a little longer, he’ll come soon," was my reply as I rested my hand on my palm and brought my knees up to support my elbows.

Tyler will be here, and he’ll comfort me like he did yesterday. Then all my pain and worries will go away.