Chapter 4
The next few days passed in a blur as Alex fumbled through coding assignments, his attention elsewhere. One or two of his online friends noticed his distracted state, but he shrugged them off with vague excuses, claiming he was working on other games and the multitasking made it hard for him to concentrate.
Hard being the operative word.
He’d sat there for ten minutes in the boardroom after Kate’s departure, trying to get control over himself.
It’d taken another five for him to straighten his shirt and not look like a drunken bum staggering home after a night out.
Candy had smiled and informed him that there was a taxi waiting for him downstairs to take him wherever he liked. The smirk on her face told him he wasn’t the first to stumble out of an interview at HP, hard and aching for release.
He’d made it all the way home without touching himself, intently concentrating on the cabbie babbling about the local sports teams.
Unlocking his front door was followed by a mad dash to the guest bathroom on the bottom floor.
He wouldn’t have made it upstairs.
As it was, he almost came as he yanked his jeans down again, cursing as he pulled at his underwear to free himself.
One, two strokes with his hand, and he’d emptied himself into the toilet, propping himself up with his left hand flush against the wall to keep from falling. He shuddered again from the memory of her inspecting him, studying him from top to bottom.
He looked at himself in the mirror.
What the hell are you getting yourself into?
Alex grinned at the reflection, a sudden euphoria racing through his veins.
Exactly what I want.
The phone call came a few hours later with a polite female voice asking when the best time to schedule would be. She made the appointment with as much emotion as if Alex were going to the doctor, her cheerful tone reminding him again to leave some extra time before and after the appointment.
The following Sunday afternoon at 2:00 p.m.
It wasn’t until Saturday night that he wondered what he was going to wear for their first time together.
If anything.
What did someone wear for their first BDSM session?
The books were no help, either the fiction or nonfiction. The majority of them were set in a club with leather thongs and naked oiled bodies; the few that dealt with a home environment were couples expanding their horizons, so to speak, and lingerie mixed with leather in a comfortable setting.
He had no idea what he was getting—hopefully something between the two.
All he got out of his reading research was even more excited, his arousal tempting him to take things in hand. Literally.
He’d lain awake more than a few nights, his fingers itching to slide down his torso and stroke himself, the image of Kate fresh in his mind.
It’d taken a concentrated effort, but Alex denied himself the simple pleasure. It wasn’t that he worried about performance issues, if he couldn’t or wouldn’t get hard when she visited—that was a given. Even thinking about her had his cock twitching for attention.
But he had control.
And he would wait. The real thing wasn’t going to compare with the written word, and he wasn’t going to spoil himself with imaginary scenarios when the legit event was so close to happening.
He did pick up a spare toothbrush to stash in the bathroom, just in case.
A few hours before the appointment, Alex surveyed his wardrobe, trying to decide what to wear.
Suit? Shorts? Socks?
He settled on a simple dress shirt and jeans.
Minus the shoes and socks.
He didn’t want to spend time pulling at anything that wasn’t important.
Alex sat in his living room with the television set on and stared at the clock, willing the hour hand to move faster.
1:30 p.m.
1:31 p.m.
1:32 p.m.
1:53 p.m.
“Oh frak.” Kate thumped the car’s dashboard. “You have got to be kidding me.”
The traffic jam enveloped her in a steel cocoon, giving her no way out. The radio babbled something about an overturned tractor-trailer, and the nearest exit was at least three miles away.
This was not how she expected to be spending her Sunday afternoon.
She extracted her cell phone and typed in Alex’s number.
“Hello?”
“Alex. It’s Kate.” She flipped the bird at a motorcyclist who whizzed by her on the shoulder. “I’m sorry, but I’m caught in a traffic jam. I might be a bit late.”
“It’s all over the news. A big one. No injuries, but they’re having trouble getting the trailer upright and off the road. Not to mention the spilled syrup,” he said. “You could be there for hours.”
“Syrup?”
“Yeah.” She imagined him smiling as he spoke. “All we need now is a truck filled with pancakes or waffles to tip over nearby, and we’ll be all set.”
“Don’t curse me.” She paused. “But that doesn’t mean we can’t start on time.”
He chuckled. “Do you have an ejector seat in your car? Otherwise—”
“Alex.” Kate lowered her voice to a heated whisper. “Are you listening to me?”
He swallowed loudly. “Yes, Mistress.”
He’s a quick one.
Good to know.
“Where are you?”
“In my living room.”
“Good. I assume you have a couch, a coffee table in your living room.”
“Yes, Mistress.” The confusion in his voice warmed her heart.
Don’t guess at what I’m going to ask you to do, Alex.
Just do it.
“What are you wearing?”
“Jeans. Shirt. Briefs.”
“Well, that won’t do. Strip down. Everything off.”
The sudden intake of breath had her grinning, despite her traffic situation.
This was going to be fun.
“Alex?”
“Yes, Mistress?”
“Do you have a speakerphone function? Turn it on if you do.” She sent a brief text to HP detailing her problem and informing them she’d be late sending the safety code signifying her arrival on site.
After it cleared, she turned her own speakerphone on and placed it on the dashboard in front of her, making sure all the windows were up.
The car ahead of her moved a fraction of an inch.
The one beside her moved a foot.
She listened to the rustle of clothing, the grunts signaling his efforts.
“I’m done, Mistress.”
“Good. Is your clothing neatly folded and placed on the couch? I don’t like a messy room.”
“Ah—”
“Do it right now. I’ll wait.”
She imagined him standing in a generic living room, stark naked and feeling somewhat foolish with a pile of clothing sitting on the couch.
“My clothing’s folded, Mistress. Just as you ordered.”
“Good,” she purred. “You told me you’d gotten yourself some toys when we last met. Tell me what they are.”
Alex cleared his throat. “A butt plug, a cock harness, a—”
“Aren’t we presumptuous about what you think I need?” She cut him off. “Unless you like playing alone. In which case—”
“No, Mistress,” his breathless reply rang out. “I just wanted to, ah…”
She could hear the imaginary wheels in his mind spinning, trying to find the right answer.
“Alex.” Kate put as much disapproval in her voice as she dared, not being able to see his face.
“I bought them when I first applied to Hooded Pleasures. I wanted to make sure you weren’t lacking for anything.” He spoke rapidly, tripping over his own words. “I didn’t realize you would be prepared. In retrospect, I should have asked you first.” He paused. “Mistress.”
“Good answer.” She couldn’t help grinning at the concern in his voice. “Now kneel in front of the table.” Her inner eye pictured the living room and the naked man now on his knees. “Do you use your left hand or right hand when you jerk off?”
She relished the sudden intake of breath as the harsh language bit at his senses.
“Right hand.”
“Start stroking yourself. Use your left hand.”
“What?”
The disbelief in his voice made her smile.
This was going to be good.
“Are you questioning me? That’ll earn you another five strokes with the paddle, Alex,” she whispered. “Now get to business. I want to hear every moan, every sigh until you’re ready to come. Then…” She drew out the word as long as she could, visualizing his discomfort. “Then stop.”
“But—”
“Again with the questions? You’re up to ten strokes. Want to go for more?”
“No, Mistress. I’m starting now.”
Kate knew that he’d be off-kilter not being allowed to use his dominant hand, the unfamiliar routine slowing his arousal despite his best efforts. It’d keep his mind and body busy until she arrived.
The car ahead of her began to move slowly, a snail’s pace. If she could get to the next exit, she could speed along Lakeshore and make it to Alex’s house within ten minutes.
“Ah.” The pained grunt caught her attention. “Ah,” he repeated, and she heard the tension in his voice.
“Don’t come,” she warned him. “I will be very disappointed if I get there and the show’s all over.” She clicked her tongue. “We might have to reschedule the appointment.”
“No. I can do this.” He ground out the words around clenched teeth.
“I’m sure you can. After all, you don’t want to disappoint me. Not on our first time together.”
A whimper came through the tiny speaker.
“Stop.” She jerked the wheel to one side and skimmed the shoulder for a few feet, enough to make it onto the exit ramp. “Go get your cock harness and put it on.”
“Now?”
Kate held back a giggle, hearing the disbelief in his voice. At this point, it’d be painful, if not impossible, to get the leather and metal harness on. “Yes. Now. Go to the front door and unlock it so I can get in. Kneel down in the hallway and put your hands behind your head as you wait for me to arrive.” She tapped the gas pedal and swerved around a slow-moving car in the fast lane. “I’ll be there soon enough. And I’ll know if you came without permission.” She paused. “You can’t hide it from me.”
She cut off the connection before he could answer, and focused on threading a path through the light traffic.
Always leave them wanting.
He was going to die from blue-ball syndrome. The first man to die due to not being able to come. They’d find him dead in the living room, a cock harness hanging from his balls.
He didn’t even want to begin to imagine the obituary.
The leather harness cut into his skin as he wrestled it over his balls, cursing and swearing as he pushed the metal ring over his cock. It was hard, painful and horribly, horribly arousing.
He stopped twice, way too close to coming to continue. Thoughts of cold showers and icy rocks, and he managed to get it half on, the leather and metal biting into his sensitive skin.
Son of a—
This wasn’t going to work.
Alex gritted his teeth and fumbled with the strap, trying to push it through the buckle to hold it in place.
Not a fucking chance.
My Domme’s first visit, and I’m screwing this up.
The thought tore at his soul, and he grabbed at the ring again.
Someone twisted the doorknob, jiggling the brass handle.
It didn’t open.
Shit.
Alex dashed for the hall and skidded along the polished hardwood floor, his bare feet having trouble negotiating the turn.
The doorknob turned again and stopped, restricted by the dead bolt.
“Coming,” he yelled, not caring about the double entendre.
He bounced off the hat rack and grabbed it before it hit the floor.
There was no sound outside the door.
If she’s left—
He twisted the dead bolt and fell to his knees, panting. A last horrible thought raced through his mind as he heard the doorknob turn again.
I hope it’s not some kid selling cookies.
The door swung open as he gritted his teeth, the cool summer breeze blowing across his bare skin.
She’d heard the frantic pounding, the running and cursing as she waited at the front door.
It was hard not to laugh.
She congratulated herself on thinking of the self-torture she’d come up with for Alex. It was a lovely distraction, keeping his mind off of watching the clock until she arrived.
The dead bolt opened with a low metallic scream.
Kate waited a few seconds, then turned the doorknob for a third time and opened the door.
Alex knelt in front of her on the narrow rug, gasping for air.
She stepped in just enough to clear the door and close it behind her. A flick of the dead bolt relocked the door.
No interruptions.
Kate turned back to study her newest acquisition.
Alex was a mess. Sweat beaded on his forehead, sneaking back into the crow’s nest of black hair. From his expression, he was right between pleasure and pain.
Excellent.
His gaze ran over the long raincoat she wore, ending at the black pumps on her feet. Alex stared at them for a minute, mesmerized by the black leather. He made a small sound, and she knew she’d chosen her attire wisely.
He’s a foot-and-leg man.
Kate filed the information away.
She cleared her throat.
He smiled and sighed, locking eyes with her.
A tilt of her head and a frown was all the warning she was going to give. It might be his first time, but he should know better than to stare at her openly.
Alex lowered his eyes and flung his hands up behind his head, a wheezed pant accompanying the effort.
“Mistress.” He stared at the floor, his chest heaving.
Kate eyed the half-done cock harness. The leather strap swayed back and forth, the bondage unfinished.
She knelt in front of the flushed man. “You made me wait. I had to try two times to get in here. After driving like a madwoman to make our appointment. I risked getting a ticket at least three times to get to you.”
He nodded, studying the hardwood floor. “I’m sorry, Mistress. I—”
“I don’t want to hear your excuses.” She strode by him and turned to go into the living room. “Stay there and catch your breath. I’ll call you when I’m ready for you.”
Alex stayed silent.
Kate dropped her duffle bag on the couch and swore silently. She hated being late, hated being rushed.
But she’d make the best of it, because she owed Alex the best she had.
It took a minute to tap in her safety code on her phone, alerting Hooded Pleasures she was on site and working.
The initial chime went off, signaling the start of the session. A gentle tone would sound every fifteen minutes, allowing her to pace herself and the client.
It was easy to lose yourself in the scene and forget the time.
Always leave them wanting more, her inner voice laughed, but make them enjoy the trip.
She stripped off the raincoat and threw it over the far chair. As she unzipped the bag, she took in the living room, noting the décor.
The black leather couch was there, Alex’s clothing neatly folded at one end. The coffee table was an abused antique, the worn wood showing where coasters should have been used for drinks and weren’t. A thin light brown carpet covered the hardwood floor almost end to end.
The computer desk at the wall held one of the best setups she’d seen in a long time—a large monitor and speakers, the computer tower on the floor one of the pricey models she’d considered the last time she’d upgraded.
His laptop sat beside the keyboard, turned off and silent like its big brother. His cell phone lay atop it, the screen dark.
He’d followed the instructions to the letter, cutting all links to the outside world—or at least as best as he could.
Well done.
A few minutes, and she had most of what she needed out of the duffle, tucked under the bag and hidden from sight.
Anticipation, after all, was half the fun.
Time for Alex to get on board.
“Come in here,” she called.
Alex padded in and knelt at her feet, his hands behind his head. He had calmed down somewhat, his breathing almost back to normal.
Good.
Now to take him out of normal.
“This—” She picked up the riding crop from the couch and touched the tip to his quivering balls. “This is not acceptable.”
“No, Mistress,” he whispered. The tremor in his voice told her he was finally realizing what he’d gotten himself into.
Fantasy made reality.
She savored his momentary panic, drew from it.
This is what you want. This is what you need.
And it is my pleasure and honor to give it to you.
“When I give you an instruction, I expect you to follow it.” She drew the leather square up along his cock. “Why isn’t this harness fastened properly?”
“It wouldn’t fit.” He grunted through clenched teeth, his hips bucking involuntarily.
“Why not?” She saw him respond to the crop’s touch, his cock bobbing for further attention.
He gasped. “Because I’m harder than hard, and it wouldn’t fit over my dick.”
She snapped the end against his inner thigh. Not hard enough to leave a mark but enough to sting. “Wrong. Try again. The harness wouldn’t fit because—”
“Because I got too aroused?” His tone rose on the last word.
“Yes.” She put the tip of the crop under his chin and edged his face up. “Exactly. Consider it your first lesson in self-control.”
His light blue eyes were wide and unfocused.
Kate allowed herself a secret smile. He was already sliding away from this world, this reality.
Mine.
Kate locked eyes with him. “Well done. You were doing what I asked you to do even if you knew it was going to be painful and well-nigh impossible.” She leaned forward and placed a wet kiss on his forehead. “Thank you.”
He shuddered under her lips, and she knew she had him.
Alex couldn’t look away.
God, she’s beautiful.
The merry widow was made of black leather and lace, the garters reaching down to hold up long black silk stockings. The high heels smelled of leather, the rich scent dominating his senses.
He almost came right there and then.
She glared at him. “What are you thinking?”
“You look…you look lovely,” he sputtered, suddenly afraid.
She raised one eyebrow.
“You look lovely, Mistress.” The flash of panic for not answering properly shot right to his balls, coiling around his cock as he waited for her response.
“Thank you.” The crop moved down to flick the dangling leather strap. “Take that ridiculous thing off.”
He fumbled with the cock harness, all thumbs as he wrestled with the leather and metal.
“I’m waiting.” A flash of heat shot up his spine at the disapproving tone.
“Sorry, Mistress.” He pulled it free and tossed it to the side. “Stupid thing,” he muttered.
The crop touched the inside of his thigh again. “What did you say?”
Oh godohgodohgod…
“I said it was a stupid toy. Mistress.”
“No.” She knelt and put her lips to his ear, the heated breath raising goose bumps on his skin. “It’s not a stupid toy when used properly. And I’m the one to show you how to use it, Alex.” She drew his name out like a long piece of taffy. “All it takes is a bit of control. That’s my area of expertise. Teaching you self-control. To start with.”
He shivered as Kate stood again, his attention now on the garters holding those stockings on those long, slender, lickable legs.
He bit down on his lower lip, fighting back the urge to lean forward and press his lips to them, tear the nylons with his bare teeth to get to the deliciousness hiding within.
“I have a present for you.” She reached under the pillows and pulled out a thin leather collar. The long strip held a simple buckle at the back and a metal ring adorning the front.
His eyes widened at the sight.
“This is your collar. No one has worn this before you, and no one will wear it other than you.”
Alex sighed as she stretched it out in front of him.
“You will keep this here and keep it safe. You will wear this for every appointment. Every time I arrive, you will have this sitting on the table, unlocked and ready for me. I will put this on you to signify the beginning of our session.” She showed him the locking buckle on the back. “I will lock it and keep the key safe until the end of our meeting. You will be my submissive and under my control and command until I unlock your collar and take it off your neck. Do you understand?”
Alex nodded.
She slipped it around his neck and clipped the small lock closed.
It was like she’d flipped a switch in his mind.
He wasn’t in charge anymore. He wasn’t dealing with stupid businessmen or deadlines, worrying about what had to be done or what needed to be said or who to call and what to say. All he had to do, all he needed to do, was fulfill her wishes and make her happy.
Tell me what to do.
Kate reached over and placed the key in her duffle bag.
“Now, let’s begin.” She wagged a finger at him. “Stand up and face the couch.”
The traffic jam had turned out to be a bonus giving her an excellent place to start training him.
“Put your hands on the armrest and bend over.” She motioned at the couch. “Remember your safe-word.”
Alex nodded and assumed the position, bracing himself.
“Since this is your first time, we’re going to start off slowly.” Kate moved out of sight before pulling out the single fingerless leather glove from under the bag. She tugged it on slowly, making him wait in anticipation. “Enjoy this now—I won’t be as gentle next time.”
She ran her right hand along the base of his spine and saw him tense up at the cool leather on his bare skin.
The first slap didn’t catch him unaware but startled him all the same, a grunt escaping as she delivered another one to the other cheek.
“Don’t even think of counting. We haven’t started yet,” she murmured as she increased the frequency, spanking his now-reddening cheeks with her gloved right hand.
Kate stopped after ten.
He hadn’t cried or yelped, hadn’t worded out or turned on her.
Good.
She drew her nails along the inflamed skin, seeing the muscles flex under her touch.
“Thank you, Mistress.”
The whisper took her aback. New clients usually didn’t have the wherewithal to speak at this point other than to safe-word out.
“Don’t thank me yet,” Kate answered as she moved to take the leather paddle out from under her bag. “That was just to warm you up.”
Alex began to turn to watch but stopped himself, staring straight ahead.
Good, Kate mentally said. Don’t look or move until I tell you to.
He might be new to the scene, but he’d done his homework and was putting it to good use.
She made sure he didn’t see it straight on but instead out of the corner of his eye. It built up more mystery, more tension if the client didn’t see all of what he was about to get.
“Let’s start with the ten for you questioning me on the phone.”
He flinched as the leather paddle slapped his bare ass, the skin pinking nicely under her application.
Kate hummed her appreciation as he said nothing, did nothing other than exhale loudly as the spanking continued.
Sweat beaded on his forehead as she finished her count.
“You failed to meet me at the door as requested.” She bent over his back, pushing on his ass with her thighs, letting him feel the garters against his oversensitized skin. “Correct?”
The answering whisper sent a warm glow through her. “Yes, Mistress.” He didn’t hesitate, didn’t push back.
“That’s worth at least twenty.” She picked up the riding crop.
Kate ran the long cane under his chin, lifting his head with a slight pressure. His hair brushed against her face. The leather collar pressed on his skin—not enough to leave a permanent mark, but he’d see the redness in the mirror for a few hours.
A temporary reminder of how he’d belonged to her, body and soul.
He arched his back and grunted.
“Do you agree?”
“Whatever you want, Mistress.” There was a trace of fear in his voice mixed with acceptance as he settled into his new role.
“Yes.” She released his head and drew the crop down the center of his spine before putting it aside to pick up the paddle. “Whatever. I. Want.”
Kate stepped back and viewed her target. She didn’t begin right away, waiting to prolong the anticipation.
Alex didn’t say anything, waiting for her to start.
He knew his place in this relationship.
She nodded her appreciation, even though he couldn’t see it.
Good.
She drew back, relishing the perfect balance of the paddle in her hand.
It took pacing to deliver so many strokes without breaking the skin or bringing up blisters, the reddening skin needing to cool down between sessions. His body wasn’t used to this, so she went light on him for their first time, angling the paddle to make more of a slap than needed to heighten his reaction, letting the sounds carry him more than the physical pain. Kate broke it up with murmured comments to him about how he was doing so well, adding the occasional caress and squeeze to his tortured skin.
A bit of honey to go with the vinegar.
He was in heaven. Or hell. Or someplace in between, he didn’t know and didn’t care.
His ass hurt, and it was the best type of hurt, the tingling spreading down his legs and up through his balls and straight to his cock. The rhythm of Kate’s counting made it easy to follow, tensing up before the paddle hit and relaxing as she pulled back for another go.
Alex swallowed, feeling the leather collar tight around his neck.
Freeing him from all responsibilities, all control. His only job now was to serve his Mistress and give her what she wanted.
The best feeling of all—no guilt.
No disapproving look. No worry about what she’d tell her friends or what might carry back to Jane. No cruel comments about being a freak or a perv.
Nothing but pure pleasure.
“Let’s change up the game, shall we?” Kate’s smooth voice in his ear startled him out of his introspection. He tensed up, waiting for her touch.
It never came.
She waited behind him, keeping her body away.
“You zoned out there for a bit,” Kate murmured.
“Yes, Mistress.”
“You need to stay focused. Let’s work on that next.” Her long hair brushed over the back of his neck.
He shivered, and his hips shifted forward as if she’d hit him, rubbing against the smooth black leather.
He envisioned digging a hole through the fabric with his cock, ripping it open with his repeated motions.
Alex wasn’t worried.
He could afford a new couch.
If he didn’t bronze this one and set it up as a trophy somewhere.
“I’m tired of counting. Your turn.” The command sent a flash of heat down his spine.
He had a second to brace himself before the paddle landed, the snap of leather sparking his senses.
“One.”
He got to five before his mind checked out and he could do nothing but moan, the delicious friction ripping away his consciousness and replacing it with a sensual fog.
“What number are we up to?” The question brought him down to earth with a shattering thud.
“Uh—”
He swallowed hard not knowing what to say.
Ten? Fifteen?
What will happen if I guess wrong?
“Did you lose count, Alex?” The whispered question in his ear had him thrusting his hips against the couch instinctively, twisting under her.
He blinked away sweat, his foggy mind trying to figure out the answer.
“Did you lose count?” she repeated, walking around the couch to face him. The riding crop appeared again, held against his chin. She pressed it up, lifting his head so he could look directly into her eyes. “Did you?”
“Yes, Mistress.” Alex moaned, feeling a surge of disappointment threaten to wash away his arousal. “I forgot.”
The softness in her gaze brought tears to his eyes.
“I’ll forgive you this time, but only because it’s our first meeting.” The leather stroked his chin. “Next time you lose count, we’ll start over again from the beginning.” She rapped the edge of his nose with the crop. “Over and over again from zero until you get it right. And while you might think that could be fun, let me point out that I’ll know if you’re trying to top from the bottom, attempting to control what happens next.” The flap of leather rested under his chin. “I am not a stupid woman. I will make you pay for it if I catch you doing that, and then I will no longer be your Domme. Do you understand?”
He nodded.
“That’s a good boy.” She turned to her duffle bag. “Time for a change of pace.”
He gulped as she extracted a large metal hook from her duffle bag. For a split second, he thought about his safe-word.
Kill switch.
Kate looked at him and pursed her lips, her eyebrows coming together in a frown as she picked up on his fear.
“Calm down.” Her smile soothed his panic away. “Stand up and turn around. Face me.”
He did so, wincing as he straightened up. A few of his back muscles protested, not used to being in that position for so long.
There wasn’t a workout routine to prepare for a spanking.
At least none he’d heard of.
Maybe a search online could turn up one.
The disconnected thought pulled him back from the fear of not knowing what was next.
“Don’t worry, Alex.” Kate went to the closet door in the hallway and opened it. She placed the hook on the top of the door and closed it, locking it in place. “It’s not going into you.” A sideways wink sent his heart racing. “Although there are options if you’d like to explore them. But we can discuss that later.”
She returned to the duffle and pulled out a set of leather cuffs.
He sucked in his breath at seeing them. It was one thing to see pictures, imagine having them on him, even buying a cheap set to play with by himself—another to see them in the hands of a professional.
Kate held them in front of him. “The hook is going to hold you up while I flog that beautiful bare back.” She tilted her head to one side with a smile. “Since you don’t have an actual dungeon here, improvisation is the name of the game.”
He nodded and stayed silent as she fastened the leather restraints around each wrist. The Velcro bands were snug against his skin.
Alex frowned, wondering why she hadn’t used cuffs with buckles.
As before, Kate was ahead of him. She ran her fingers along the edges of the wide bands, softly brushing against his skin.
“Easy release.” She eyed him. “I always use these for the first few times with someone new. Fewer panic attacks. If I have to get them off quickly, it’ll work a lot better than fumbling around.”
He wanted to tell her he’d be able to handle the real thing right here, right now, but he couldn’t.
He couldn’t. His tongue was thick and frozen in place as he stared at the restraints on his wrists, the feel of the leather mixed with the roughness of the collar on his neck sending shockwaves through his body.
Alex looked at her.
“I know what you’re thinking, but not yet. Walk before you run.” Kate stroked his cheek. “Trust me. I understand what you want, what you need.”
She does.
The revelation almost broke him open.
She gets this.
“Now get your hands up. I don’t have all day.” She pushed him toward the door.