Chapter 36

*Twenty years ago…*

*“James! Time for dinner, bud!” Panic sliced through me and looking at Marcus, he felt the same way. His blue eyes were wide with fear staring back at me. We had always been able to communicate without speaking words. I knew without a doubt, if we failed, Marcus would die.

“Don’t tell him. Promise me!” Terror filled his words as he begged me to keep quiet about where he was. And where he was going. Although I didn’t know where he’d end up so I couldn’t spill the beans. “Please, James.” His words came out as a whimper.

“I promise.” And I really did. “I won’t tell.” I threw my arms around Marcus, giving him a hug for the final time. I watched as my oldest friend disappeared into the woods, the mop of brown hair bobbing until I couldn’t see him anymore. Finally, I turned and ran towards the cabin, where my dad was waiting.

“Hey, buddy.” Dad always greeted me with a smile. He ruffled my hair, the same color as my best friend, and I slipped past him headed to the kitchen. “Where’s Marcus?” He followed after me, and I tried to control my racing heart. Lying to my dad sucked, but Marcus had to go away. He couldn’t stay at home anymore, and no one would understand. I was the only one could help him.

“He was still swimming. I told him to come. He’ll be here in a minute.” I smiled up at my dad, praying he didn’t detect the lie. “Is Mr. Johnson still gone?”

“Yeah, so Marcus is with us for the night.” There was no way to know for sure, but my dad sounded irritated about Mr. Johnson’s absence. This was supposed to be a guys trip, just the four of us camping, fishing and hiking all weekend. I didn’t mind Mr. Johnson’s absence, though. He was so mean to Marcus and took the fun out of everything. Also the longer he was gone, the greater chance Marcus would get away.

I sat at the table and tried to steady my shaking hands, hoping dad couldn’t notice how scared I was. If Mr. Johnson found Marcus, he’d kill him. We had to buy enough time for Marcus to get far away. Twenty minutes later, when Marcus hadn’t come in, my dad started to get concerned. “Hey, James stay here. I’m going to go out to the water and get Marcus.” My palms were sweating now and my heart felt like it would beat out of my chest soon.*

*James*

I shot out of bed in a panic. The nightmares had gotten better these last six months since Liv has been here, but I guess the shock of Nick’s death was enough to bring them back full force. Glancing at my wife laying in bed next to me, my heart cracked a little more. How much more could this woman handle? Quietly slipping out of bed, I grabbed my cell off the nightstand and padded to my office. Closing the door behind carefully so I don’t wake Liv, I sat at my desk and pulled up the messaging app on my phone.

***Was this you?***

I tapped the words into a new message feed and sent it to the secured phone number I’d been given. I stared at the phone, willing a response to come through. Finally three dots appeared letting me know a reply was forthcoming.

***No. But I’m not upset about it.***

Not knowing if I should be relieved or concerned at this response, I turned to the window in my office. There was an unmarked car across from the house, no doubt the security Travis and I decided to hire until we found out who murdered Nick. The police had no leads. Whoever it was knew how to cover their tracks, and until we knew why Nick was killed, I wouldn’t assume Liv was safe. My phone buzzed, drawing my attention back to my phone.

***How is she?***

Taking a deep breath, I considered how best to answer this. Liv had such a complicated relationship with her father. He was horrible to her, but losing a parent is never easy. She may not be mourning the father she lost, but I’m certain she’s mourning the one she’ll never have.

***Overwhelmed. Confused. She feels like an orphan.***

I stare at the message feed for a long time, but no response comes. Tossing my phone aside, I pull up the contact information for Nick’s attorney. Surely he’ll have information on what burial plans Nick had in place. Nancy is refusing to even speak to Liv, much less help with the planning. After leaving a message with his secretary, I lean back in my chair and start to doze.

*“Nick! Call me back immediately! It’s an emergency!” My dad is practically screaming into the phone. He kept pacing the living room, which he started as soon as he couldn’t find Marcus in the water. Dad’s cell phone rang a few minutes later. “Finally! Where the fuck are you?”

He silently listened, “I’m not going to cover for you this time, Nick. This is too far! What if he drowned and someone finds him?” I can’t hear what is said after that, but dad throws his phone across the room against the wall, shattering it.

“James, where did you see Marcus last?” He kept asking the same question over and over.

“He was swimming in the lake, dad.” The panic in his face was terrifying. I felt awful not telling him the truth but Marcus was afraid he wouldn’t help. That’s the moment tears started to roll down my face.*

“James?” Liv’s voice brought me out of the dream. It felt so real, like I was right back there. Ten years old. Helping Marcus escape. I looked up at my wife, fresh tears in her eyes. Jumping up from my chair, I put my arms around her, letting her cry into my chest. “I’m sorry.” Her words coming between sobs. “I woke up and you were gone.”

Realization dawns on me that everyone in her life has left her. Either by choice or circumstance. “I’m sorry, sweetheart.” Squeezing her a little tighter, I pressed my mouth to the top of her head. “I was reaching out to Nick’s lawyer. I thought I could help handle the arrangements. You were finally sleeping and I didn’t want to wake you.” Fresh sobs came as her shoulders shuddered in my arms. I walked us back to our bedroom, and crawled into bed with her, letting her cry until she had nothing left. We laid in bed, my fingers running through her hair, silence filling the room.

“I don’t know who I am anymore.” She spoke so softly I almost didn’t hear her. “My father is dead. My mother isn’t my mother. My brother is dead. My whole life has been blown to pieces.” I struggled to find words that would comfort her, but before I could she continued. “I’m so lost.” Reminding her that she has me, and the rest of the Wilson clan, feels inadequate so I just hold her tighter.

A couple hours later, Beth arrived with breakfast for us. Seeing her best friend’s face brought another round of tears. We sat at the kitchen table, eating Liv’s favorite breakfast tacos and drinking coffee. “Is it too early for tequila shots?” Liv’s voice breaking the silence. Beth’s face spread into a wide grin as she reached into her bag and grabbed a brand new bottle of tequila. We all burst into laughter at that, and it felt good.

“I’ll clean this up, then follow up with the attorney again. You two camp on the couch and relax.” I stood and started clearing plates.

“James, its not your responsibility to plan Nick’s service. I can do it.” Liv argued, but her voice betrayed her hesitancy.

“Olivia Wilson. When we said I do, that meant in good and bad times. You have been through more in the last six months than most go through in a lifetime. Take the day, hang out with Beth. I will get the process started but won’t finalize anything today.” I pulled her in my arms again, leaning down to brush a soft kiss on her lips. She sunk into my embrace, relief washing through her body.

“You are too good for words, James Wilson.” She pressed a kiss to my cheek, then retreated to the living room with Beth. As her words echoed in my mind, guilt pierced my gut once again.

I stood at the sink washing dishes and let my mind wander back to that dark day. The day I lost my best friend. The day everything changed. My phone buzzed in my pocket and I fished it out, and lost the ability to breathe when I read the words on my phone screen.

***Tell her. Or I will.***