Chapter 42 Rachel
Zara’s POV
He laid on the bed with her.
They had enjoyed all intimacy, finding all the pleasures he could get from her. And I’d thought I was starting to secure my place with him. But it was all fallacies. No place for me with him.
“Tristan.” I struggled to speak, suppressing my breath so she wouldn't see the weakness in me.
So I did not sound desperate. But of course I’d never been able to hide it.
Tristan didn't answer. Her hands were still holding him back. What else did she want?
“You have to come with me,” I said.
Sluggishly, as though she was a magnet slowing his movement, he walked toward me. I left the door, walking at an unusually slow pace to match his. I couldn't stand to be so close to him—not after what he did outside.
He was behind me. He didn't quicken his step to meet me. He didn't bother. But as we walked further, the footsteps I heard doubled. Someone else was behind him. Who else could that be except Celine?
Why would she be following behind us?
Had he finally given her the place as a mate, or marked her and she’d accepted?
I could have turned back to confirm, but I didn't. I was sure it was her.
But what was also concerning was that I feared I was starting to develop fear for him. Fear that his darkness had enveloped him, closing off his kind nature to return to the beast he once was. It went far above that—I didn't think I could still be that free with him.
Soon, it was just him walking behind me. That was when I turned back to look.
I should have said something, but it didn't seem like there was a need to. Maybe he should have, but he didn't care to.
“You need to see this,” I said.
All he did was nod.
We stepped outside the building, closer to the spot I'd seen him tending the burning fire.
The boy he’d locked in the underground prison lay lifeless on the floor, burn marks and claw marks on his skin.
“You killed him.”
He didn't speak, just looked at the body, while two gammas stood beside it, ready to carry it out.
“He wasn't a spy,” I told him.
He didn't flinch.
“This.” I rolled open a letter that had its ink almost washed out. “Read it.”
He didn't touch it.
“He came to visit his sister, but he was trying to sneak in because he heard rumors of war. He was only trying to be careful to see his sister.”
He was staring down at the floor. His eyebrows weren't even twitching. Not even his eyeballs rolling.
“Tristan? I’m talking to you—see what you did.”
That was when he raised his gaze to meet mine.
“His name was Cory. He wasn't a spy. He was innocent!”
“I didn't kill him.”
“What? What do you mean you didn't?”
He kept shaking his head. “I never intended to. I never did.”
“You had it in mind.”
“No.”
“I saw you holding the knife at him in the council hall, but I never thought you'd go this far…”
Looking over at the body, it felt like our positions were switched and I lay lifeless after a wrong conviction had been given for me. But it was scary to imagine that Tristan would do that to me.
He wouldn't.
But he did to this innocent Cory.
“He was supposed to be reunited with his sister, but you cut that short.”
“I didn't.”
“The burn marks on his skin… the burning fire I saw you watching as though it gave you the most pleasure you’d ever had.”
“You call that the most pleasure?”
“You love darkness, don't you?”
It became silent between us. I felt a tinge in my heart. I shouldn't have said that, but I couldn't withdraw the words. Even if I could, that wouldn't stop them from being true.
“I asked him to leave.” He broke the silence. “The fire wasn't for him.”
His voice had no life, but it wasn't weak either. It wasn't something new about him.
“But his body is here, and your clothes were stained with blood.”
His eyes locked into mine. I found myself taking a step back from him, holding my breath, and releasing slowly.
“You don't believe me?” he asked.
“I do… I’ll always believe you.”
“You believe I didn't do this?”
“You didn't.”
I’d already started walking away before he made another sentence. Nothing he would say would matter anymore.
My legs were close to failing me, but I was trying so hard to walk fast. He might call me back.
I didn't want that. Just a few steps and I would be out of his sight, then I would run, not considering that I would have to meet him again.
My mind had gone insane.
Just to be clear, I wasn't walking out of the palace, and not inside the building either.
\---
I bumped into one of the chief gammas.
“Zara?”
“Oh… sorry.”
“You're going out?”
I increased my pace. “Yes.”
Tristan could mindlink the gammas to stop me from leaving. I had to avoid that. I would always come back to meet him. Even when I vowed not to, I always did. My insane level of attachment to him.
I needed to clear my thoughts. I needed to get to Rachel, the only friend I had ever since my parents left this pack.
They’d left after Tristan became the Alpha, and that insane level of attachment had made me refuse to go along with them. As of this moment, I didn't know if I should regret my decision, but I did miss my own family.
“Hmmm.” I sighed.
I was far from Tristan's palace. Far from the sight of the gammas, except for ordinary guards patrolling the pack.
I was in the surroundings of Rachel’s house.
She was the only one left in this pack. Her own family had also left.
But she had made herself busy. She’d turned herself into a gardener in her own home, causing the scent of flowers and trees to provide serenity, and maybe subtle quietness.
“Rachel.” I called close to the staircase leading to the front door.
It was just the sound of wind blowing against the trees I heard.
She would have run out to meet me by now. I hadn't come to visit her for over a month.
And then I knocked.
No answer.
The wind blew the door open. The chairs and tables had been toppled over. The mirror that was normally placed in this sitting room had cracks all over it, some of its shattered glass on the floor.
“Rachel?”
She wasn't expecting me to come at this time, but I knew she barely left home, especially in the early hours of the morning.
“Are you in here?”
I got to the room door, and then I knocked. She must have been far gone into sleep, probably too tired the previous day.
But so many knocks should have woken her up by now.
I pushed the door open.
I froze.
“Ra… Rachel?”
Her body was on the floor, her neck ripped apart by claws.