I woke slowly as the soft fur brushed against my cheek. For a moment I was confused, then I recalled the small white ball of fur cuddled against my chest. A thick blanket was draped over us, one I didn't remember pulling over myself. My brows furrowed as I tugged it closer as more confusion settled in. It smelled faintly of sandalwood and something else-something dark, almost bitter. Him.
The small dog shifted and his tail wagged slightly. Caressing his ears, I spoke. "Did you do this?" scratching his ears as I glanced around the room. Of course, the dog couldn't have fetched the blanket. My lips twitched at the absurdity of the thought.
"Ms Rosewood," I gasped at the sudden voice and looked wide eyed at the stairs where Daniyellei was standing. She bowed slightly as if she was apologetic and muttered in accented English. "It's time for dinner."
Dinner? How long had I been asleep? I pushed the blanket aside and stood. "I'll be there." I replied softly.
As I made my way to the kitchen, Chester trotted at my heels. Yes, I would name him Chester. His claws clicked lightly against the polished floors as I chuckled and pretended to run. The moment I stepped inside, I froze.
And there he was.
A storm draped in stillness. Where silence screamed louder than words. The shadows didn't just follow him; they worshipped him, curling at his feet like smoke.
He didn't move, yet the air bent around him, trembling under his reign. His eyes-dark fire, molten amber, cold ice and deep oceanic-burned through me like a song I didn't know the words to but felt in my soul.
And I run to the things they said would destroy me.
My chest tightened. My breath faltered. It was first time in days I was seeing him and I didn't know how I felt. It was overwhelming in a way I couldn't decipher. Like I was looking at the Sun yet I couldn't handle the burn. It shouldn't hurt the way it was. Looking at him shouldn't hurt.
Judas.
The devil I couldn't look away from.
I was terrified by this dark thing that slept in me; all day I feel its soft, feathery turnings, its malignity just by a look at him.
He sat at the head of the table yet his sharp eyes flicked to mine briefly before settling back on the tablet in his hands.
I swallowed hard. He did not look at me, and yet I felt seen-as if his eyes grazed my soul, discarded it, and moved on. Without a word, I slipped into the farthest chair, trying to make myself as small as possible. My chest tightened as I picked at the edge of my sleeve, my appetite suddenly nonexistent.
I was a flicker in the corner of his vision. Nothing more. And yet, I burned. He burned me. I didn't know what bothered me more.
"Come here," Sin wrapped around me and I ignored him. He had no right to make me feel insignificant whenever he wanted. I was a human, I had a heart unlike him. I felt things, even if it was from him. They did hurt me, and I wonder he was even aware of that.
When I didn't move, I felt a sudden shift in air. Like I just provoke a sleeping lion.
Did I care? Yes.
Was I scared? Yes.
Would I obey him? No.
He was looking at me now; I could feel his heavy and expectant gaze.
Eyes that raked over my soul. After a moment or two, when it was too much, my throat went dry as I stood, Chester padded beside me as I approached him.
Why did I stand? God. I was insufferable.
"Sit with me," he gestured to the chair beside him. Voice so deep it touched the depths in me and I clenched my jaw. This was not what I should feel.
I hesitated as the lump in my throat grew. Before I could move, Chester barked sharply at him, his small frame vibrating with rebellion.
"Chester," I scolded softly, kneeling to calm him. "Hush."
"Where did you get that?" I looked up as Judas's lips twitched in what might have been amusement as his pale eyes raked over Chester.
I glanced at Chester and back at Judas, feeling my cheeks flush. "I found him outside," I mumbled afraid if he'd take him away from me too. "I'm sorry. I'll leave him out tomorrow."
To my surprise, he leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms. "Keep him."
I blinked. "Really?"
He nodded once and started typing on the tablet. I stayed knelt on the floor for quite some time. He really let me keep a stray dog? Or would he use him against me in future?
Daniyellei's entrance broke the train of my thoughts as she placed the food on the table and her usually composed demeanour seemed unusually tense.
I sat on the chair as she approached Judas and leaned down to say something to him.
"Sir," Daniyella began in Russian, "We've picked up a potential threat."
Judas's jaw clenched as a muscle under his eye twitched. "Details," he ordered.
She glanced at me briefly before continuing in Russian. Their words flowed rapidly, sharp and clipped. I shifted uncomfortably, feeling like an intruder in a conversation I wasn't meant to hear.
My cheeks burned as I looked down at my hands, biting the inside of my cheek to stop the rush of anger building inside me. I hated this-being out of place, being left out.
Whatever Daniyellei said made Judas tense, his knuckles whitening against the edge of the table. His gaze flicked to me briefly, and I felt a shiver run down my spine.
When they finally finished, I felt like I'd swallowed a rock. Daniyellei stepped away and I couldn't stop myself anymore.
The tension in the room snapped like a taut string.
I pushed my plate away, my hands trembling as the ceramic scraped against the wood. The sound was deafening in the heavy silence. "Excuse me," I muttered, scooping Chester into my arms. My voice wavered, brittle, barely holding. "I'm not very hungry."
His voice lashed across the room. "Sit the fuck down."
I froze mid-step, my breath catching in my throat. Chester squirmed, his small body restless in my arms, but I couldn't move.
"I'm not hungry," I repeated.
I flinched as he let out a heavy snarl and the chair scraped against the floor. My heart thundered as he stood. I barely had time to react before he was in front of me, towering over me, looking at me as if he wanted to strangle me.
I craned my neck to look at him.
His hand clamped around my arm pulling me to his chest. I gasped. "You don't leave unless I say so," Voice low and edged with something that made my knees weak.
"Let me go," I whispered tightening my arms around Chester who squirmed in my arms.
He barked sharply but Judas didn't even blink. His grip tightened, just enough to remind me of his strength.
"Don't play with me, Ptichka," he hissed, leaning in close. His breath brushed against my skin, hot and dangerous. "I've been far easy on you. I gave you time, gave you fucking space you wanted. But it seems like the more lenient I am, the more rebellious you're becoming."
"I'm not defying you. I…" I stammered, but the venom in his eyes stole my breath.
"Don't lie," he cut me off. "Do you think I don't see the disdain in your eyes? Do you think I don't hear the silent screams of rebellion clawing at your throat every time you look at me?"
"And what about the disgust in yours?" I shot back, the words tumbling out before I could stop them. I didn't care if he'd hurt me, but I would not bottle up my emotions one more time. "You look at me like I'm dirt beneath your feet. Like I'm ugly."
His eyes flashed, and he hissed through gritted teeth, "I wish you were. But even that wouldn't stop me. You're fucking temptation carved from hell. You're a curse I can't fucking unbind!"
"I'm a curse?" I laughed bitterly. "If I'm carved from hell, then you must be the devil himself."
He fisted my hair and I hissed. "Careful," he growled. "You don't want to play games you can't win."
"I'm not playing anything," My voice trembled but I pressed on. "You hate me, don't you? Then let me make it easier for you. Let me go."
His jaw clenched so tightly I thought it might snap. And he seethed. "Hate doesn't even begin to describe it. You're in my veins, running like poison. I can't rip you out, no matter how hard I fucking try! Can't you understand?"
I shoved at his chest but he barely budged instead I felt him losing his control and I loved it. I had the power to unravel him too. "Then stop trying! End it! Let me go before you destroy us both!"
His hands shot out, gripping my neck and he laughed sending shivers down my spine. "Let you go? You think I can? You think I don't wake up every damn day wanting to destroy you just to silence this madness in my head?"