Chapter 58 "Rec Time"
Ember
The cafeteria was massive easily three times the size of any dining hall Ember had seen on campus. Rows and rows of long metal tables, all bolted to the floor. A serving line at one end where women in hairnets were slopping food onto plastic trays. Officers stationed at strategic points, watching everything.
And the noise god, the noise. Hundreds of women talking, laughing, arguing, their voices bouncing off concrete walls and creating a cacophony that made Ember's head pound.
"Stay close," Shanice said, getting in line. "Don't look at anyone too long. Don't stare at anyone's food. Don't talk unless someone talks to you first."
Ember nodded, her mouth dry.
They moved through the line. Ember accepted a tray with sections for each part of the meal: something that might have been Salisbury steak, mashed potatoes that looked like paste, green beans that were grey-brown, a carton of milk, and a piece of white bread.
The smell alone made her nauseous.
Shanice led her to a table in the middle of the cafeteria not too close to any particular group, but not isolated either. A strategic position, Ember realized.
"Eat," Shanice said, already digging into her own food. "I know you don't want to. I know you feel sick. But you gotta eat anyway. You don't eat, you get weak. You get weak, you become a target."
Ember forced herself to take a bite of the mashed potatoes. They tasted like cardboard mixed with water and something vaguely chemical. She chewed mechanically, swallowed, then took another bite.
Around them, the cafeteria pulsed with life. Groups of women clustered together obvious cliques based on race, or gang affiliation, or just time served together. Officers circulated, breaking up arguments before they escalated, keeping watch.
Ember felt eyes on her constantly. The new girl. The one from the news.
The killer.
"Yo, Shanice!" A woman approached their table thirties, Latina, with intricate tattoos covering both arms. "Who's your new cellie?"
"Ember. She's fresh."
The woman looked at Ember with open curiosity. "You're the college girl. The one who killed three dudes."
Ember didn't know how to respond, so she just nodded.
"Damn. You don't look like a killer." The woman sat down without invitation. "I'm Rosa. Did twelve years of a fifteen-year sentence for trafficking. Almost done, thank Jesus."
"Only got eight months left," Shanice added. "Rosa's been counting down days since year eleven."
"Damn right I have." Rosa studied Ember. "So what's your story? How'd a college girl end up murdering three guys?"
"She don't want to talk about it," Shanice said firmly.
"Everybody's got a story in here," Rosa pressed. "Might as well tell it before someone makes one up for you."
But before Ember could respond before she could figure out what to say a commotion erupted three tables over.
Two women were standing, shouting at each other. One shoved the other. The other shoved back, harder.
And then they were fighting really fighting. Fists flying, both of them crashing over the table, trays scattering everywhere.
"Fight!" someone yelled, and instantly the cafeteria erupted into chaos.
Women jumped up, some moving closer to watch, others backing away. Officers rushed forward, batons out, shouting for everyone to sit down, get back, stop moving.
"Don't get involved," Shanice hissed, grabbing Ember's arm. "Just sit here. Don't move. Don't look."
But Ember couldn't help looking. The two women were on the ground now, rolling, punching, pulling hair. Blood was streaming from one woman's nose. The other was screaming something Ember couldn't make out.
The officers reached them, pulling them apart with practiced efficiency. Both women were cuffed, still screaming at each other, and dragged from the cafeteria.
The whole thing had taken maybe two minutes.
"Sit down!" one of the officers barked at the women who'd stood up. "Everyone sit down now or you're all going back to your cells!"
Slowly, the cafeteria settled. Women returned to their seats. Conversations resumed, though more subdued now.
Ember's heart was racing. Her hands were shaking so badly she could barely hold her fork.
"That's nothing," Rosa said casually, going back to her food like nothing had happened. "Wait till you see a real fight. That was just a disagreement."
"Happens all the time," Shanice added. "You'll get used to it."
Ember didn't see how she could ever get used to this. Any of this.
She forced herself to eat more of her dinner, each bite sitting like lead in her stomach. Around her, the cafeteria had returned to its previous volume as if two women hadn't just been dragged away bleeding and handcuffed.
This was normal here. Violence was normal. Fear was normal.
How was she supposed to survive ten years of this?
After what felt like an eternity, the buzzer sounded again.
"Rec time," Shanice said, standing with her tray. "Two hours before lockdown. You can go back to the cell if you want, or come to the common room. Up to you."
Ember wanted to hide in her cell. Wanted to climb into her bunk and pretend none of this was real.
But Shanice had said you needed allies. Needed people.
"I'll come to the common room," Ember heard herself say.
"Good choice."
They dumped their trays at the collection point and followed the crowd back to Unit B's common area. Most of the women headed there some claiming tables to play cards, others gathering around the TV, a few just sitting and talking.
Shanice led Ember to a table where Rosa and two other women were already setting up a card game.
"You know how to play spades?" Rosa asked.
"No."
"You'll learn. Sit."
Ember sat, and for the next two hours, she tried to focus on learning the card game instead of thinking about where she was. Who she was with. What her life had become.
The women at the table were surprisingly patient teachers. Rosa explained the rules. A Black woman named Tasha showed her which cards to play. Even a quiet white woman named Becca offered occasional advice.
They didn't ask about her crimes. Didn't push for her story.
It was almost... normal. Or at least, as normal as anything could be in this place.
Around them, the common room hummed with activity. Women watching a reality show on TV, arguing about which contestant was the worst. Others playing chess at a different table, their game intense and silent. A group gathered near the windows, talking in low voices about something Ember couldn't hear.
"New fish alert," Tasha said suddenly, looking toward the entrance.
Ember followed her gaze and saw officers escorting another woman into Unit B. She was young maybe Ember's age or a little older with blonde hair pulled back in a messy ponytail and wide eyes that were trying very hard not to show fear.
"Damn, they're packing this place," Rosa muttered. "That's the third new girl this week."
The blonde girl was being given the same speech Ember had received earlier, though Ember was too far away to hear the words. The girl nodded, her arms full of bedding and supplies, looking overwhelmed.
The officers left her standing there, alone, clearly lost.
"Someone should help her," Becca said quietly.
"Not our problem," Rosa replied, playing a card.
But Ember found herself standing up before she could think better of it.
"Where you going?" Shanice asked.
"Just... I'll be right back."
Ember walked across the common room, weaving between tables, her heart pounding. She didn't know why she was doing this. Didn't know what she could offer this girl when Ember herself was barely surviving.
But she remembered standing in the doorway of her cell earlier, terrified and alone. Remembered how grateful she'd been that Shanice had spoken to her, had offered even the smallest bit of guidance.
Maybe she could do that for someone else.
The blonde girl was still standing where the officers had left her, clutching her supplies, looking around like a rabbit surrounded by wolves.
"Hey," Ember said softly when she got close.
The girl's head whipped around, her body tensing like she was ready to run.
"Sorry," Ember added quickly. "I didn't mean to startle you. I just, I got here today too. Thought you might want someone to show you around. Or at least tell you where your cell is."
The girl's shoulders relaxed slightly. Up close, Ember could see she had green eyes striking against her fair skin and freckles across her nose. She looked like she should be in a college dorm, not a prison.
"I'm Ember," Ember said, offering a small smile.
The girl stared at her for a long moment, something flickering in those green eyes. Recognition, maybe? Or just the natural wariness of someone trying to figure out if this was a trap.
Then, slowly, she smiled back. It was tentative, uncertain, but genuine.
"I'm Sienna," she said, her voice soft with what might have been a slight accent Ember couldn't quite place.