Chapter 39 Mind Blown
I'm dumbstruck. Did he just-
My brain has short circuited, replaying his words over in my head again, trying to figure out if this is all some crazy dream, or if he had actually just handed me the answer to every prayer I've every prayed.
“Josie. Marry me,” he stated, stepped forward, taking my face in his hands. “I can take you away from Beth. I can keep you safe. You and your sisters will be protected. I can take care of all of you financially. You won’t have to work unless you want to! Just marry me,” Rick whispered, swallowing hard.
I am officially speechless. He actually said those words! He just- I blink looking at him trying to pick my jaw up from the floor.
“Please, little dancer. Marry me," he insisted, the only thing that could save him was my answer. But how do I answer something like that?
"Josie, please. Be my wife. Let me take you away from your aunt and uncle. I know you had to take Charlotte to the hospital last night and you used up most of your savings just to take care of your sister. I can help. You just have to say yes," he whispers urgently.
"Rick..." I breathe. I blink the tears that are threatening to fall. This is the best offer I've ever had in my life, and yet, I don't know if I can fully trust him. "I... I don't know..."
And then his lips are on me, warm, firm, and insistent, sending jolts of pleasure rushing through my bloodstream. I don't know how to stop myself from responding to this kiss I never thought I'd have.
I instinctively clench his shirt in my fists, pulling him down to me. He groans in approval and slips his tongue between my lips, teasing mine. He nibbles on my lips and sucks on my tongue and my head starts to spin from over-stimulation... I've never been kissed like this before.
I moan into his mouth, needing him more than I need my next breath. I reach up on my toes and press my body up to his firm form.
I can feel his hand curl around the back of my head while the other slip down my back and landing on my ass, holding me firm to his body. I can feel his heart pounding against mine. It's good to know I'm not the only one who's gone crazy.
"Josie," he rasps into my mouth. "Let me have you. I've wanted you for so long... I would've had you if my dad hadn't messed everything up for me."
"Rick... I'm still-" I gasp for breath as he reaches up and squeezes my breast. It feels so good... My brain struggles to focus on my arguments, but looking up at him has every argument die on my tongue at the look of lust in his eyes.
"Don't you dare tell me you are giving him a chance he doesn't deserve! I never cheated on you Josie! I was just trying to keep you away from me. I knew if I hurt you there was no way I could get my hands on you," he argues. "I only did it because my father is an asshole and didn't think we were good together. But he was wrong! Little dancer, we were made to be together!"
I blink back sudden tears. I'm so confused right now. He did say something about his dad telling him that I wasn't good enough for him. He told me he was pushing me away... And then he found the contracts.
Was it all just to keep me away from him, or is there some other reason he bullied me? Did he have to hurt me so badly just to keep me at arms length? Could't he just say "I'm sorry, but we can't be friends?" and leave it at that?
Why the hell does if feel so good in his arms when I'm supposed to be with James? Why have I never felt like this with James? He's the one pushing for sex, and Rick hasn't said anything about it. He just asked me to marry him. Would it still feel this good if we got married? Does that make me the cheater?