Chapter 115 Died

Chapter 115 Died
VINCE’S POV:
“ENOUGH, ALYSSA!” 
My voice echoing fiercely, making the woman before me convulse in pure dread.
Her lips were silenced though it was followed by the sudden realization of my lost composure.
Alyssa flinched violently. 
Her whole body trembled, and a sudden terror flooded her wide, tear-filled eyes. 
“Al… Alyssa….” 
She took a swift step back, her hands coming up reflexively to guard herself as if she expected me to strike her.
No, no, no, I would never raise my hand….
My heart rate dropped, unwanted apprehension began to creep into my skin.
What the hell did I just do?
“Alyssa…” 
I breathed out, the rage instantly disappearing into the air, replaced by a sickening panic. 
“No, wait. I'm sorry. I-I didn’t mean to yell…”
I took a careful step toward her, reaching my hand out. 
“I'm sorry. I lost my temper…” My hand almost came near her face, eyes narrowed with desperation to redeem.
“Look at me, sweetheart. I would never hurt you…” 
“Don't touch me!” she screamed as she pushed my hand away with all her strength. 
My heart was constricted but I couldn’t do anything.
I had fucked up.
“Stay away from me!”
“Alyssa, please,” I pleaded with her, stepping closer again, desperately trying to pull her into my arms to stop the shaking. 
“I'm sorry. Just let me hold you. I shouldn't have yelled. I didn’t mean to… I swear.” 
"Get off me! Let go!" She thrashed against my chest, shoving her palms against my shoulders and weeping uncontrollably. 
“Don't touch me! Just stop!”
"Alright, alright, I'm letting go," I said quickly.
Backing up a step and putting my hands up defensively to show her I was giving her space.
Though every instinct inside me demanded I hold her against me and fix this. 
“See? I'm stepping back. Just don’t… panic. Please."
She fell onto the edge of the bed, burying her face in her hands. 
“Stay away from me… you are not the man I loved…” 
My feet froze with wide eyes. Though it was explicitly clear from her blind faith but to hear from her tongue.
It was an entirely different feeling.
“I can't do this anymore, Vince,” She cried, unable to look up at me.
Her shoulders shook with thundering, heartbroken sobs that echoed in the room and pierced my heart.
“I just want him back... I just want the man who loved me back…”
The intensity of her words caused me to flinch.
The agony in her tone wasn't just about her father—it was about me. 
The soft, gentle husband she thought she had. The man I had fabricated to win her over Arden. 
The man… I ended up becoming one.
“Alyssa…” 
I clenched my fists at my sides, my head hanging low with unsaid shame. The truth burned at my throat.
But I had never shared my heart, my pain with anyone. 
How could I…?
“I am sorry…” 
She looked up at me, tears streaming down her pale cheeks, her eyes searching mine for any trace of the past. 
“Where did he go, Vince? Where did my husband go?”
I swallowed hard, forcing myself to look straight into her eyes, refusing to give her a lie to cling to.
"That man you loved never existed…" I whispered wretchedly.
Forcing my steps to come closer and sit on the ground, right beside her knee, the harsh truth spilling out between us. 
“He was a lie I created in order to steal the woman Arden loves from him. To make her mine.”
My gaze lowered with dejection. “I never meant to marry you or use your heart for my selfish purpose.”
Her broken tone came, “But, you did, Vince. I did.”
I shut my eyes, “I know I did and I am shameful. But… I wanted him to lose what he cherished too.”
My head slowly caressed against her knee, hanging my head low, lips quivering, unsure how to speak my next words.
“But why? Why would you want such destruction for the man you considered your brother-alike?”
I stared at the ground.
The dead body. 
The pain.
The screams flashed before my eyes.
“He took everything away from me, Alyssa."
“And it is your justice that I pay for whatever he did?” 
“Call me selfish.” I looked up at her, unwanted moistness near my eyes.
“But, yes.”
She stared at me for the next few seconds before shattering under the weight of hatred I had for Arden.
“Why…?!” Alyssa yelled sorrowfully, hitting the mattress.
“Why did my life have to end up like this?! What did I do to deserve the absolute worst of everything?!”
Her sight—wretched, sobbing until she could barely breathe—completely destroyed whatever cold frontage I had left. 
Anguished me more than I could have imagined. 
I shifted and wrapped my arms tightly around her waist and pulled her trembling body down into my chest.
“I'm sorry,” I spoke against her hair, “I'm sorry, Alyssa. For every pain I have given you.”
She didn't fight me this time. She clutched the back of my shirt, weeping into my shoulder. 
Slowly, trembling, her hand reached down and searched blindly for mine. 
Her fingers intertwined with mine, squeezing with a hopeless strength.
“Please…” she breathed out, looking up at me through a blur of tears, her voice barely a whisper. 
“Just for a moment... just hold my hand. Be the man who loved me. Please, Vince…  even if it is just pretend.”
I stared down at our joined hands before glancing into her shattered eyes.  
How could she still seek the man who ruined her?
This was wrong. 
That was not what was supposed to happen.
“I can't, Alyssa,” 
“Why not…?” she wept, her grip on my fingers tightening until her knuckles turned white. 
“Just pretend… For one minute…”
"Because that man is dead.” I whispered.
“He was killed, Alyssa."
Alyssa froze, a fresh wave of agony twisting her features. 
“You killed him... You killed the only good thing I had…”
“I built him to get close to you.” 
I rested my forehead against her, her hand joined with hers as I attempted to control my tightening beats.
“I finally thought my life was becoming beautiful…” Her voice came muffled against my chest, weakly hitting my chest.
“I was happy, Vince… With you, I was actually happy for the first time in my life… And you ruined it.. You ruined everything!”
“I know,” I gulped, swallowing hard yet I kept her close, “I know, I ruined it all.”
I kissed the top of her head, refusing to let her go. 
“But I could not have the same outcome as Lucia….” 
Her eyes narrowed, “If your sister died that doesn’t mean you will too, Vince…”
“I did, Alyssa. Trust me….” 
A broken smile spread on my lips.
“I died too.”