CHAPTER 78

CHAPTER 78
Sophia felt on top of the world Monday morning when she rode to work with James. Optimism, an alien concept to her until now, simmered in her mind.

So she hadn’t been able to make love to him without him being tied to the bed. Yet. But they had made love! That was a huge step for her.

She was . . . happy. When was the last time she could say that and really mean it? Her old version of happiness was merely a shell, a code word for simply existing. It wasn’t until she got involved with James that she realized just how much of her life was passing her by while she kept her head firmly in the sand.

The weekend had been utter bliss. They hadn’t made love again since Friday night, and both seemed reluctant to push too hard and too fast, but the intimacy had grown around them to such an extent that she knew it wouldn’t be long before they took the plunge again.

And maybe this time she’d pluck up the courage not to tie him up for the act.

She’d been worried about him after he’d confided about his childhood to her, but other than being a little quieter than normal Saturday morning, he didn’t seem to be much worse for the wear.

She’d purposely kept the mood and tone light between them, not wanting him to go back to the blackness of his past. She’d told him she loved him countless times and had been openly affectionate with him.

She hadn’t chosen to confide in him about her childhood, not because she didn’t trust him, but because him confiding his had taken a huge toll on him emotionally and she hadn’t wanted to add to it. In time, she’d get around to it. When the moment was right. She wasn’t looking forward to it, but neither was she avoiding it at all costs.

Dealing with it. That’s what she was doing and would do. With James’s help. His love and support. What else could she ask for?

Toward noon, Derrick stuck his head in her office.

“Can I come in?” he asked from the doorway.

She motioned him forward. “Of course. What’s up?”

He sat in one of the chairs, the same one James had occupied seemingly a lifetime ago when she’d pondered getting rid of them. Now? She didn’t mind the intrusion of either him or Derrick in her office. Especially James.

“You’re looking good, Sophia. You look happy.”

She blinked in surprise, discomfort crawling up her spine at the personal note the conversation took. But sincerity was clearly etched on Derrick’s handsome features so she shoved aside her instinct to clam up. It’s what she would have done in the past, no doubt. But she was trying on the new Sophia for size. Someone who could open up more to her friends. To people in general.

She’d never be the bubbly, friendly breath of fresh air that Karla was. Nor would she ever be as sweet and loving as Sandra. But they were rubbing off on her just as James was, and she found herself more relaxed around her circle of friends. More willing to let her guard down. At the very least, she wanted to lose the bitchy, abrasive aspect of her personality. Things she’d used as a defensive mechanism before.

“I am happy,” she said simply.

“Sandra wanted me to invite you and James over this Friday. Karla and Ken will be coming too. Nothing fancy. She’s itching to cook a good meal and have our friends over.”

Heat surged into Sophia’s cheeks and she dropped her gaze, ashamed of how her last trip to Derrick’s house had gone.

“I’d like that,” Sophia said in a low voice. “I’m sure James would too. And Derrick, I know I apologized to Sandra, but I’ve never really apologized to you for how I reacted when you told me James was becoming your partner.”

“Already forgotten,” Derrick said, his voice warm. “I know you didn’t mean to hurt Sandra. I was pretty pissed at the time, but I know your heart, Sophia. And I know you love her and would never intentionally hurt her.”

“I’m trying to be a better friend. A better person,” she amended. “I know I’m not always easy to love.”

She said the last with a grin, marveling that she could even joke about matters she was normally extremely sensitive about.

Derrick chuckled. “Well, neither am I. I think we all know that by now. But I also want to offer you an apology.”

She lifted her gaze again, her eyebrows rising in confusion. “Whatever for?”

“For taking advantage of you.”

“What?”

“You work hard. Damn hard. And James’s right. You’re more than capable of contributing more to this company than just your duties as our administrative assistant. I read over the proposal you prepared for the S&G contract. I was very impressed.”

She blushed, uncomfortable with the sincere praise. But extremely pleased as well.

“Those were James’s ideas as well. I can’t take the full credit.”

“But that’s James’s job,” Derrick said dryly. “I’d expect as much from him. I’m only sorry it took his prodding to wake me up to the fact that you would be an invaluable asset as a partner.”

She smiled. “It’s okay, Derrick. I wouldn’t have been ready before. I didn’t have enough confidence in myself. But I will. I’m working on it. I certainly won’t turn down such an opportunity or challenge. But I don’t want anything given to me that I haven’t earned. And I want to earn your and James’s approval and eventually perhaps a partnership as well.”

“You have my approval, Sophia. You always have. You have my confidence as well and certainly James’s. He recognized your abilities right away, something I’m ashamed to say I didn’t.”

“He’s good like that,” she said with a soft smile, warmth flooding into her mind at the thought of James and how much he believed in her when she wouldn’t believe in herself.

“I’m very happy for you,” Derrick said, his voice going quieter. “I know it hasn’t been easy for you since Clement died. I miss him too. He was my best friend. He—and you—are family.”

She swallowed the knot in her throat, proud of the way she maintained her composure when her brother was mentioned. She truly was making progress. She’d come so far in just a few weeks. Thanks to James.

She knew she couldn’t fully credit him with her progress. She’d done a lot on her own. She had to. No one could make her do so but herself. She had to be willing to move forward, and until recently she hadn’t been. But James had definitely kick-started her way down the path. Without him she’d still be hiding from the world, going through the motions of each day and not living. Truly living.