Chapter 238

New text from Andy: Dare I ask?

I am traumatized.

New text from Andy: Poor bb, ill kiss it better ::kiss emoji::

New text from Andy: wh happn? She fnd old condoms in hall bthroom or smth?

…Shit, now Scooter had to go check all the cabinets in the hall bathroom.

Discreetly. 19

“I can’t believe you still haven’t told our parents,” Mark said. His bulk took up half the space at the picnic table across from Simon, providing much needed shade from the setting sun.

Simon brushed the wrinkles out of his shirt. “I will tell Mother and Father what they need to know, when they need to know it.”

“You always did play your cards close, but this is extreme, even for you. Don’t you think they should know?”

“Have I, at any point in our lengthy relationship, ever given you the impression I will do what you ask just because you nag me? No? That’s because I have not,” Simon said. “I asked for your support, I appreciate that you are giving it. Now, stop rehashing this argument.”

“Just be careful,” Mark said, clapping Simon’s arm. “There are more hearts at stake than your own.”

Simon rolled his eyes. Mark could get on his very last nerve. He scanned the crowd again; events at the park were well attended, but he’d been quite precise when selecting a meeting location. “What do you know of hearts, brother?” Simon had barely gotten the words out when he spotted Howard, and from Howard, it was easy to trace the line to Stahl, and then to the tiny creature running at them, full tilt.

“Mark!” she yelled, and flung herself directly at them, trusting Mark to catch her before she brained herself on the table. Which he did, of course, big oaf that he was. He picked her up and swung her around, letting out a booming laugh at her squeal of delight.

Stahl and Howard looked significantly less pleased as they caught up. “Mark,” Howard greeted, somewhat coolly. “Simon.” That was downright frigid.

Simon waited, unmoving, until Mark realized he was being watched by several sets of gazes and rather reluctantly put his niece on the ground. “Go say hi to your dad,” he said, giving her a gentle tap in that direction.

Simon leaned forward almost unconsciously, wanting to touch that small face and search it for the resemblances. He blinked several times. This. This is what he could have had and did not.

“Good evening,” Simon said, extending a hand to the girl. She gave him a suspicious look that was…remarkably like her mother.

She just looked at him for a moment, somber, her cheeks still flushed from the excitement of a moment ago. Finally, she took his hand and shook it, a bit hastily. “Hi. They said you’re my, my father.”

“I am also so informed,” Simon said. “It was perhaps as much of a surprise to me as to you. A strange, unexpected, and wonderful surprise. You certainly have the look. It’s astonishing.”

“What look?” she asked, taking a step back to lean into Stahl’s side.

Simon tapped his face, just to the side of his left eye. “You have my eyes, princess. Not common among your extended family. Your Uncle Mark, you see, has blue eyes, as do both our mother and father. I am somewhat of a throwback, I’m told.” He tried on a smile; Mace had once told him his smile was charming. It was not his usual expression. “I see your mother in you as well.”

Billie’s head cocked to one side as she studied him. “I guess so. Do you like Legos?”

“At one point, Mark and I had quite a number of them.” Simon said. “But I have not seen them in years. Are they a favorite of yours? I’m afraid I’m not well versed with what interests children, but I am willing to be educated. We could make an attempt to learn together, could we not?”

Mark was being distinctly unhelpful, rolling his eyes behind the girl’s head and peering around at the scene as if bored. He probably was. Mark barely had space in his head for more than one thought at a time.

She shook her head. “My favorite is playing house. But boys aren’t very good at it.” She gave Stahl a pitying look, amusingly out-of-place on her young features. “Legos are okay. I have lots.”

“Perhaps boys haven’t had very good instruction in playing house,” Simon said. “I shall depend on you to teach me. So, I shall offer you an alternative for the moment. I would like to speak with your Uncles Stahl and Howard. Would you like your Uncle Mark to take you over to the playground—there, princess, where the castle is—or should you like to contribute to our discussion?”

That caught her attention, and she looked somewhat flattered by the offer. “What are you gonna talk about?”

“Legal matters and the results of the paternity test, and your preferences for your living arrangements, and those sorts of things. As it applies to your future, it might have some small interest to you, but I am also getting the impression your uncles wish to yell at me for a while, so I thought we might not bore you with that.”

Billie grinned hugely. “Better you than me!” she singsonged, catching hold of the hem of Mark’s shirt. “Will you push me on the swings?”

Stahl cleared his throat expectantly.