Chapter 39

He staggered back, unsteady and Jane wished she could take the words back.

"What the fuck did you just say?"

The tears that ran down her face didn't seem like it was stopping any time soon. With those few words, reality crashed down on her. She realized that she was bound to do what her father wanted for her, not what she wanted for herself.

"I'm to be married."

She watched Sebastian's eyes close, hiking the ground would open up and swallow her. So many what-ifs are passed through her mind. What if her family wasn't rich? What if she could choose to do whatever she wanted? What if she could choose Sebastian? Could she live without her family?

"I see." His eyes opened again and all she could see swirling in those brown orbs was defeat. "That's why you rejected me."

"I didn't—" She started then stopped. She didn't what? There was no point in denying it. "I don't have a choice. We have to stop this…whatever this is."

"I love you, Jane."

A sob escaped her. "Please stop." She told him, backing away. She had to get out of here. She had to leave. She just had to.

"Kitten—"

"Don't call me that." She cried. Even after she'd told him the truth, he still wanted her.

How was she to tell him that she loved him too? How was she supposed to live with choosing him after betraying her own family? They needed her. The company needed her. She couldn't live the thought that she'd abandoned her own family when they needed her the most.

Sebastian took a few steps towards her, his eyes misty. "Tell me you don't love me, Kitten. Look me in the eye and tell me you don't love me."

The ground was suddenly very interesting. She loved him. She loved him more than she'd ever loved anyone. But who was she kidding? Nothing good would come out of them together. Sure, they might have a good run but somewhere along the way, she was going to sit back one day and think about how she didn't have a family to go back to—because there was no way her father would forgive her if she didn't marry that arrogant piece of shit—and she was going to hate herself for abandoning them and then she was going to hate him for making her choose.

So Jane did what was best. For her, for him, for everyone. She looked him in the eye and uttered the most u true words to ever come out of her mouth, "I've never felt so neutral towards anyone before. I don't love you and I never will."

And then she ran. She ran so he wouldn't see the stream of tears that were flowing down her face and she ran so her breaking heart didn't entirely collapse from the hurt in his eyes.

It felt like that was what she'd been doing her whole life: running. All through her life, she'd run from her doubts and fears, telling herself that being the daughter of a billionaire business tycoon was the biggest privilege any girl could get. Telling herself that she was fortunate and that she didn't have any right to complain. Life had been good to her, after all.

She'd told herself that the least she could do for her family was make them happy, even at the expense of her own happiness, like there was a pedestal so fucking high up in the scale and she and the rest of the world had placed herself on it. So that was what she did. She woke up every day, did her business and went to work. She didn't hate her job; she only hated the conditions that came with it.

She never even had time for love. Elijah had been an unexpected and advantageous occurrence. It had happened when she least expected it, had even had to keep it a secret for the reason that she didn't want it to be taken away from her. It had felt good to have someone to talk to, even if he hadn't listened to a word she'd said and was more interested in getting her naked. And not surprisingly, it had amounted to nothing. Why? Because before anything or anyone else, her family came first.

No one knew that she wished for a quieter life. One where her decisions were hers to make and the consequences were solely hers to bear. A life where she wasn't judged by the instance of her birth or the social status of her family. A life where she could decide who to love and who to marry when the time came. A simple quiet life that equaled happiness, freedom and satisfaction.

A life where Sebastian was in it.

Sebastian. The only man she'd really loved.

Her heart broke into a million pieces. The look in his eyes haunted her. He must've felt that she led him on with the knowledge that nothing could ever happen between them and he'd fallen for her. And now she'd gone and broken his heart. It didn't matter. He was never going to see her again. He was never going to kiss or hug her or touch her again. She wasn't going to belong to him because the sad and painful truth was, she didn't even belong to herself. She was a slave to her family's wealth and status.

"Jane."

The stern tone halted her in her tracks.

The man in front of her was the last person she'd expected to see in the world. Dread filled her. Her life was over. The thought rang in her head a few times, fixing her on the spot. It was all over.

"Dad?"