Chapter 234 Chapter 234

Chapter 234 Chapter 234
Violet
It happened so quickly I almost missed it, but then his jaw tightened hard enough to tremble and he looked away from me briefly, blinking once like he was trying to regain control over himself.
“I can't," he said quietly. The softness of it hurt more than anger would have.
I should have walked out minutes ago.
Instead I stood there staring at him while my chest twisted into knots so painful I almost hated myself for still caring.
Elijah inhaled slowly before speaking again.
“Do you think there has been a single day where I haven’t wished I could take it back?”
I swallowed hard.
“You let me fall for you while everybody else knew it was some sick game.”
“That part wasn’t real,” he said immediately, his voice rough. “The bet existed, yes. I’ll spend the rest of my life regretting that, but what I felt for you was never fake. Not once.”
“You expect me to believe that after seeing Nicole all over you?”
The second her name left my mouth, something ugly flickered across his face.
“I never loved her.”
I laughed bitterly.
“Right.”
“I didn’t.” His voice sharpened suddenly with frustration. “I tolerated her. There’s a difference. Nicole was hungry for power and status…and she is an obsessive stalker. I was too arrogant to think I could get rid of her easily when I had made perfectly clear that we were just fuck buddies. But then she wanted more, and got me drunk enough to exchange rings with her.”
I stared at him in utter disbelief.
“I don’t remember shit about the engagement or the rings but she had this whole album of photos, friends celebrating our union, us exchanging rings and smiling happily. I felt trapped and ran away because I didn’t know how to prove myself correct. I went to another city to avoid her but when she barged into my life again, demanding marriage and that I don’t leave her, I used the bet as an escape…”
His eyes met mine again.
“Of course I have no proof to prove my truth to you…” he inched closer again, his voice going down. “But I know some part of you still wants to believe me,” he whispered.
Anger flared through me immediately at how easily he read me.
“No, I don’t.”
“You do.”
“You’re delusional.”
“Then why are you still standing here?”
I opened my mouth but couldn’t think of a proper response.
Elijah stepped closer again slowly, his face too close to mine.
“I know you hate me,” His eyes searched mine restlessly. “But don’t stand there pretending this thing between us disappeared just because you’re angry. Because if the bet was real, this is real too. All the kisses we shared, all the promises I made, those were fucking real, Violet.”
I physically leaned away a little and a dark chuckle rose up in his mouth again.The raw honesty in his voice made my stomach tighten painfully.
“You know what scares me?” he asked softly.
I said nothing.
Elijah laughed weakly under his breath, though the sound carried no humor whatsoever.
“It isn’t losing you.”
I turned to look at him, our lips a hair’s breadth away from each other.
“It’s realizing I would still want you even after.”
“That’s not going to happen.”
His smile turned bitter. “It’s pathetic, right?”
My throat tightened.
“You think I enjoy this?” he continued quietly. “You think I enjoy standing here begging for scraps of attention from somebody who can barely tolerate looking at me anymore?”
My pulse stuttered painfully.
Elijah was not a man who begged. Everything about him screamed power and control and ruthless confidence yet here he was unraveling in front of me piece by piece.
“Elijah—”
“No, let me finish because you keep walking away before I can.” His voice broke slightly now, frustration and desperation tangling together. “Do you know what it feels like watching the woman you love slowly teach herself how to live without you?”
The ache in his voice was almost physically hurt to hear.
“I would rather you screamed at me,” he continued quietly. “I would rather you hit me again, curse me, cut me open if you want. At least then you’d still be looking at me, still talking instead of shutting off completely.”
My chest tightened so violently I had to look away which was a bad idea because the second I broke eye contact, Elijah’s hand moved instinctively toward me before stopping midway again.
“You used to reach for me first.”
I squeezed my eyes shut briefly.
“Please stop doing this.”
“What? Telling the truth?”
“You’re making it harder.”
The second the words slipped out, silence crashed into the room.
My eyes widened slightly. Shit.
Elijah went completely still.
Then very slowly, carefully, he asked,
“Harder?”
Heat flooded my face immediately.
His voice had gone dangerously soft again and hope flared across his expression so suddenly it looked painful.
“Violet,” he whispered and I took a sharp step backward instantly.
“No. I didn’t mean it like that.”
His face fell immediately.
“You want honesty?” he asked quietly.
Before I could react, he stepped even closer and my back hit the wall behind me.
“Elijah, this isn’t…”
“I wake up angry every single day because you still affect me this much,” he said roughly. “I hear your name and my chest tightens like some fucking teenager in love for the first time.” 
His eyes burned into mine. “The mere thought of another man near you makes me genuinely start imagining violence.”
My breath caught.
“And the worst part?” His voice cracked slightly. “The absolute worst fucking part is that even now, after everything, if you asked me to crawl on my knees for you, I would.”
The confession slammed into me so hard that my vision blurred slightly.
“Elijah…”
“No, listen to me.” His breathing had become ragged again. “You think this is an obsession? Fine. Maybe it is. Maybe I’m too far gone where you’re concerned.” 
His eyes glistened now, unshed emotion making them shine unbearably. “But don’t ever insult what I feel for you by calling it fake.”
I stared at him silently.
“You think I broke your heart but you fucking ruined me, Violet.”
The words nearly knocked the air out of my lungs.
“I was fine before you,” he whispered shakily. “Cold. Empty. Cruel maybe, but functional.” His eyes searched mine helplessly. “Then you happened and suddenly everything mattered too much.”
Something hot burned behind my eyes so I forced myself to move and put distance between us.
“Violet, please. Tell me how to make it right. Tell me what should I do so that you will forgive me? How do I prove to you that you mean the world to me, that I love you like I would die if I don’t see you everyday?”
“I can’t do this right now.”
“You can,” he said quickly, stepping toward me again. “Yell at me more if you want. Hit me. Break me. I don’t care. Just…” His voice cracked badly. “Just don’t leave me again. Please, I’m begging you.”
“I’m getting married to Dane” I blurted out.