Chapter 253 BENEATH THE SURFACE
Percival
It all kicked off when I wanted to get stronger, to be a better wolf for Edeline. For my buddy. But with Nixx’s big trouble coming up, my wolf and I chose to go a different way. We would get stronger, but our reasons for it would just keep growing. We are totally down to do it for Edeline and to help me deal with things. Let’s get my two sides to chill and vibe together. And we would absolutely do it for power—like getting back at my dad. Gaspar was totally on board with that idea.
“Hey, does that rib hurt at all, dude?” Gaspar looked up at me as we strolled through the woods on our way back to the cabins.
I shot Gaspar a quick look and shook my head, signaling 'no.' Honestly, I was not really feeling much of anything. After taking so many hits from him, I had learned to bounce back each day and do it all over again. I had just become numb to a lot of things. There was something about the internal pain that I liked. It gave me a sensation to cling to instead of feeling weak. I really did not want to feel weak ever again.
My parents totally thought I was crazy when I decided to get a few tattoos. I had a big one slung over my shoulder that reached down to my bicep—our crew's tribal symbol. I also had another large one on my back and a warrior symbol on my inner bicep, courtesy of Gaspar. But my favorite was a cool tattoo guys get when they find their match. It sat just below my waistband, right in the middle of my stomach. A symbol that looked like this: ∞.
I might have also gotten my lip pierced. I was getting hooked on the pain.
Right now, though, I was feeling pretty numb. While hanging out with Daisy during therapy, I realized that my dad's mistakes had really messed things up for me. Anita had given me a hard time, but she was gone now. And Tatiana... she had pushed Edeline way too far. If it weren't for Anita, none of this would have gone down. My wolf had given me some trouble, but really, it was mostly on me. I just never had the strength. When it came to my skin, I usually just went with the flow. So, my wolf was totally the boss now. I was cool with him sharing what he wanted or needed, and we were meeting halfway.
Anita was still on my mind, you know? The stuff she had done...
“I really wish I could take care of her myself,” I muttered, feeling that familiar weight of frustration settle over me again.
These days, I was just not feeling happy about anything. Fighting was the only thing that made my wolf and me feel alive, aside from all the good times Edeline and I had shared.
With all this testosterone pumping through my system, I felt aggressive lately. I just could not chill with my friends like I used to. The guys kept wanting to take me on, and my dad was keeping me away from the other pack members—not just because of the challenges, but also because my wolf and I were always feeling a bit on edge. We were constantly checking things out, always alert. Even Mirabelle and Nixx could not hang out with me too much because their wolves got all weirded out.
I totally got it.
My wolf did not see them as a threat, but since we were always on high alert, it made them a bit wary. Not great. The only wolves I could hang out with were my dad and Gaspar, but honestly, every time I saw my dad, my wolf and I just wanted to take him down. He had not been around for over a month now.
He had no idea how much I had grown.
My mom dropped by sometimes—only when Gaspar was not around. I had mixed feelings about her too, mainly for not being honest with everyone and for what she did to Gaspar that nobody knew about. But I would never go after her. My wolf just could not handle the idea of taking down a female. We could deal with teaching submission, but taking a life? That was just not going to happen.
Gaspar was the only one, along with Daisy and Doc, who could handle the vibe I put out. He could deal with me, and I could keep my urge to take him out in check. Honestly, I wanted to get back at Gaspar a lot of the time because of how he teased me. My wolf and I totally understood that he was the reason we were tougher.
Daisy had been way more like a mom to me than my actual mom. Doc kind of felt like a stepdad, you know? His wolf could see that I was stronger, so he could not really look me in the eyes like he used to, but he knew I was not going to hurt him. He and Daisy had been hanging out a lot, and I was totally cool with it.
When we hit the treeline and spotted the cabins ahead, Gaspar turned to me, his face a mess of bruises. "Alpha Maxim is swinging by tonight to see how you're doing. Your mom invited him over for a pack barbecue, but you can't go." He winked. "Alpha's gonna swing by for a private chat. I'll catch you at the field after the pack wraps up practice. You’ll have to deal with that broken rib again. Just feel it, own it." He gave me a playful slap on the side, knocking the breath out of me as that rib jabbed painfully.
I wanted to chase after him, to make a fuss, but instead, I just glared at his back as he strolled off to his cabin. Instead, I stepped out of the woods and into Daisy's cabin.
The warmth wrapped around me, and the familiar smell of herbs stirred my senses. Dragon chai tea. The door shutting let Daisy know I was back home. She and Doc were lounging with their usual morning tea when I walked in, still covered in blood and sweat. No tears today. I don’t cry anymore.