Chapter 22 – The right to intrude.

Hannah's been unleashing someone that wasn't really her. She hated doing it but she had to. For the sake of one family that she had unintentionally kept apart.

Just now, Elisha's been crying for the nth time this week dahil lagi niya itong pinapagalitan. Kaunting bagay na hindi naman nito kasalanan ay nagagalit siya. Hindi nga lang niya ito sinasaktan physically. Hindi na niya magagawa iyon sa anak niya na hindi naman dapat paluin. Eli was a good girl. Hannah's proud to have raised her like that.

Pero kailangang lumayo ang loob nito sa kanya. That's what she'd been trying to do. Pero si Elisha nagmamakaawa sa kahihingi ng sorry sa kanya. Hindi ito nagagalit. Kaya mas nahihirapan siya. She wanted so badly to pacify her but she needed to be hard on her.

"Mommy... Sorry! Mommy!" Yumakap ito sa binti niya. "I'm not going to play dolls again if you don't want, mommy," mga manyika kasi ni Eli ang napagdiskitahan niya kanina. Wala lang. 'Di naman nakakalat. Gusto lang niyang magalit.

"Let go, Eli!" galit niyang sabi na pilit tinatanggal ang pagkakakapit nito. "Go to your bed and sleep!"

"But I don't want you to be mad at me. Mommy, please... I'm sorry! I love you so much, mommy! Please don't get mad!"

"Eli you're being hard headed!" Tumulo na rin ang luha niya. Why was it so hard?

Pumapalahaw pa rin ng iyak si Elisha nang tumawag si Adam. He was asking if they could meet. Pumayag siya. Hindi na siya nagdalawang isip. Okay lang kahit malaman ni Nate. Mabuti nga kapag nagkagano'n para magalit na rin ito sa kanya. That way, ito mismo ang magpapalayas sa kanya.

Isa pa, napapagod na siya sa sitwasyon sa bahay. Sumisikip na ang malaking mansyon ni Nate and Hannah's getting tired of living a double life.

Hindi nga lang doble. Kailangan niyang magpanggap sa bawat taong nakakaharap niya. She had to appear strong for Olive, she had to be cruel with Elisha and appear fine in front of Nate.

But in all that, no one bothered to ask her true condition. Nobody cared enough to know how she really felt.

Madali siyang nakaalis sa bahay. Tiniming-an niyang naka-assemble ang mga guards para sa mga instructions ng head nila. Isa lang ang naiwang nagbabantay sa gate. Sa madaling sabi, nakatakas siya by wearing a maid's uniform.

"Thanks for coming, Hannah," si Adam na ipinaghila siya ng upuan.

Medyo nalate siya kasi nahirapan siyang makaalis ng subdivision.

"What do you want to talk about?" Diretsong tanong niya na inihingi rin ng despensa ang pagpunta niyang naka-maid's uniform.

"It's dad. Yesterday, his doctor told him na hindi na siya magtatagal," sabi nito at alam niya na ginagawa nito ang best nito para maging matapang. "Six months at the most, Hannah... That's all he's got left... H-have you already talked to kuya?"

"I'm sorry..." sumakit ang dibdib niya sa kaalamang may taning na ang ama ni Nate. Pero anong magagawa niya? "Andami-daming nangyayari ngayon. I'm sure aware ka. Napaka-busy ni Nate. Hindi ko siya makausap."

"Yeah... It's Olive, right?" Ngumiti ito nang medyo sarkastiko. "Bilib din naman ako sa babaeng iyon. After what he did to my brother?"

"He must have really loved her," parang hiniwa ang puso niya sa sariling sinabi.

"He's stupid. The perfect girl is in front of him all along and yet he still rushed for his ex's rescue..." ginagap nito ang kamay niya sa ibabaw ng mesa." How are you coping up?"

"Ano ka ba? Okay lang ako. I knew that this time would come. Nate told me that I cannot stay forever. So yeah, I'm okay." 'Wag lang kumidlat at tamaan siya, Hannah was confident she had said that with conviction.

Tumango-tango ang kausap niya at 'di na pinalawig pa ang issue.

"Bakit hindi n'yo subukang lumapit ulit kay Nate?"

"As if we can set foot in his house again." Umiling ito. "I'm sorry for dragging you into this. Alam ko na wala ka namang kinalaman sa amin pero ikaw ang aming inaabala."

"Gusto kong tumulong, Adam. I honestly wanted to. I just hope magkaroon ako ng pagkakataong kausapin si Nate tungkol dito."

"You live in the same house, Hannah."

"I'm leaving soon." She smiled bitterly.

"Why so sudden?"

"Of course not. Over staying na nga ako eh."

"Hannah Rodriguez?!"

Sabay silang napalingon ni Adam nang may babaeng lumapit sa mesa nila. Sa dibdib nito ay may nakasabit na 'press' habang may camera man naman sa likod nito.

"No," si Adam ang sumagot na protective na tumayo upang harangan siya. "Please leave us."

"Ms. Rodriguez," hindi pinansin ng babae si Adam. "Totoo ba na may relasyon kayo ni Nate Sarmiento?" Tiningnan siya nito na parang disgusted sa sarili nitong tanong. Hannah knew why. How timely it was. Naka-maid's uniform pala siya.

"Ginagamit mo ba ang anak ni Mr. Sarmiento para mapalapit sa kanya? Alam mo ba na dahil sa 'yo naghiwalay sila ng aktres na si Olive na natagpuan kamakailang halos wala ng buhay?" Sunud-sunod nitong tanong kahit pa halos itulak na ito palayo ni Adam. "Ms. Rodriguez, totoo bang ikaw ang nag-utos sa hindi nagtagumpay na pagpatay kay Olive?"

Handa naman sana si Hannah na 'wag na lang itong pansinin. Kaso sa huling sinabi ng reporter ay nagpanting ang tainga niya.

Siya ba? Tinangkang patayin ang sarili niyang kaibigan? Gusto niyang tumawa sa harapan nito hanggang sa sumakit ang tiyan niya.

But the reporter's words were like a painful stab in her heart. Saan galing ang akusasyon nito? Ganoon na ba siya kasama sa mata ng publiko?

Siya na wala namang alam sa lahat ng nangyari?

"Please leave," pakiusap ni Adam.

"Hannah Rodriguez!" Pilit pa rin ng babae.

She was mad. Everything's getting out of hand. Hindi na siya pwedeng manahimik na lang. If Nate wouldn't stand up for her, then siya na ang gagawa no'n para sa sarili niya!

After all, she didn't need anyone in her life then except for Eli. Kung kailangan niya ng magtatanggol sa kanya, she could be her own defender!

-----

"What did you do that for?!" Halos pasigaw na tanong ng frustrated at galit na si Nate kay Hannah.

"What?" Painosente niyang tanong.

"D*mn it Hannah! Don't play dumb with me!"

Syempre alam naman niya ang tinutukoy nito at naiintindihan niya kung bakit ito nagagalit.

"Why did you tell everyone that you're my maid? You know so well you are not just some maid! And then pretend that Adam is your boyfriend?! Why are you even seeing him without telling me?!"

Naunahan kasi siya ng inis niya kanina. She was too tired of being judged by the people who do not even know her in the slightest. Nagkataon lang na nakasuot siya ng maid's uniform at si Adam ang kasama niya.

Ang problema, imbes na nalinis niya ang pangalan niya, she added lies to the story. Na katulong lang siya ni Nate at si Adam ang totoo niyang karelasyon.

"I don't have any obligation to tell you my affairs." Sinalubong niya ng parehong intensidad ang titig nito. He was mad? Huh, siya rin.

"Really, Hannah? You did this to me?" Hindi nakaligtas sa dalaga ang bahagyang sakit na dumaan sa mga mata nito. "You know how I feel about my brother. I trusted you!"

"I'm sorry," yumuko siya. Guilty siya ro'n. Pero hindi naman niya sinasadya. Kahit naman sino, may boiling point din. "But I needed to defend myself!"

"Defend?" Ulit nitong napasuklay sa buhok. "I was trying to protect you, Hannah! But you still went your own way and put the matter into your own hands!"

"Protect me?" Hindi niya napigilang maging sarkastiko ro'n. "How? By keeping me and Eli inside your house? Do you even watch the news? Do you even know that while you don't want to talk about the issue, all the public thinks that I am destroying your family? You can hold your peace forever, Nate and you wouldn't give a d*mn even when the world thinks that I'm a bad person!" Pumiyok ang boses niya. "Me, a home wrecker? A slut? A killer?!"

"What are you talking about?!" Bahagyang naningkit ang mga mata nito. "You aren't any of those!"

"See? You don't know! That's what I thought. You weren't trying to protect me by keeping mum about the issue. You do not even know what's happening, Nate!"

"So you think your lies helped?"

"At least it helped clear something out!"

"Which one? That you're a maid or that you're not related to me because you're secretly in a relationship with my brother?"

"It doesn't matter!" Frustrated na rin niyang sabi. "I actually did you a favor, right? Now you do not have to explain who I am in your life!"

"Really?" Sarkastiko itong tumawa. "By pretending to be with Adam?" Dugtong nitong halatang 'di maka-move on sa issue involving his brother. "Of all people, Hannah, it really had to be Adam?!"

"Nagkataon lang na siya ang kasama ko. If it wasn't Adam, I'd pull whoever is close to me at that time and tell everyone I'm dating him!"

"Why were you with Adam, Hannah?"

"H-he asked to see me."

"Why?!"

"What is it to you?" Sa nakikita niyang galit sa mga mata nito, she couldn't tell him the truth.

"D*mn it!" Sigaw ng binata na ikinapaigtad ni Hannah. "'Wag ko lang malalaman na nag-uusap kayo para pagkasunduin kami. Because I don't remember giving you the right to intrude in my family's affairs!"

Napapikit siya nang mariin sa sinabi ni Nate. Oo nga naman. Wala siyang karapatang makialam. Sino ba naman siya, 'di ba? But she promised herself hindi niya ito hahayaang matulad sa kanya. Na sa puntod na lang ng ama nito ito hihingi ng tawad.

That would be too painful to any child and Nate Sarmiento was no exception.

"No... of course not." Pinigilan niya ang luhang sumungaw sa kanyang mga mata. "Why would I even think that I have a right to do so?"

Hindi ito sumagot na tila napipilan nang makita ang mangiyak ngiyak niyang itsura.

"I- if there's nothing else, I'll go check on Elisha," sabi niya after a few awkward seconds.

"Hannah." Tumayo rin ito at mas malumanay na ang boses ng magsalita ulit. "What I'm trying to say is– like I told you before, my situation is different and–"

"I got it, Nate," she snapped. "I understand. I'm sorry."

"Hannah," he called bago siya makaalis. "Please... "

"What?" She smiled bitterly. "I told you, naiintindihan ko kung anong gusto mong sabihin. I'm not dumb."

"You don't—" napalunok ito as he looked at her with tired eyes. "I didn't mean to shout, I'm not angry. I'm not—"

"Don't mention it." Binirahan na niya iyon ng pagtalikod before her tears started their way down her cheeks.

It just hurts so badly because she genuinely wanted to help.

"Hannah?"

Okay, kamalas-malasan naman, nasalubong pa niya sa hallway si Olive. Tulak-tulak ng nurse nito ang wheelchair nito at mukhang papunta rin sa silid ni Elisha.

Hindi naman ipinilit ni Olive na sabihin na agad-agad kay Eli ang totoo. Pero ramdam ni Hannah na interesado na talaga itong maging ina sa anak nito.

"Liv!" Pinasigla niya ang tinig sabay tuyo sa mga luha.

"Are you okay?"

"Y-yeah. Of course." Pinaalis muna niya ang nurse at siya na ang umalalay sa kaibigan. "You want to see Eli?"

"Yeah. I promised her we're going to play dolls today," her friend's face lit up with happiness, making Hannah hurt at the sight of it.

Paano siya magiging masaya para sa kaibigan niya kung alam niyang kaunting panahon na lang ito na ang tatayong ina sa batang solo niyang binuhay ng apat na taon?

"T-that's good," she lied at pumusisyon sa likuran ng wheelchair nito para marahan iyong itulak papunta sa silid ni Eli. Para na rin itago ang obvious na sakit na nasa mga mata niya.

"Narealize ko na ang sama kong ina kay Elisha. Sana mapatawad ako ng anak ko. I seriously wasted so much time away from my daughter."

"Don't worry... She's a good kid."

"Yeah. Thank you so much, Hannah."

Pagdating sa silid ni Eli ay nadatnan na nila itong naglalaro pero agad itong lumapit nang makita sila.

"Mommy!" Tumakbo ito sa kanya at naghintay na lumuhod siya at kargahin ito gaya ng lagi niyang ginagawa noon. But like what she'd been doing the last few days, hinayaan niyang makontento ito sa pagyakap sa kanya na umaabot lang sa kanyang hita. "Mommy."

"Hi Eli," bati ni Olive na hinawakan ang anak nito sa isang kamay para kunin ang atensyon nito.

"Eli, tita Olive is here. She said you're going to play dolls with her."

"Yes but won't you join us, mommy?" Malungkot nitong tanong.

"No. I'm going to do something in my room. You enjoy with Tita, okay?"

"Can we play in your room instead?" Hopeful na tanong ni Elisha.

"Let's not disturb Hannah, Eli," si Olive. "She's busy. Besides, I'm here."

Nagpahinuhod na lang ang bata pero bilang tumayong ina at ama nito mula sanggol ito, alam ni Hannah na hindi ito masaya.

Tahimik siyang lumabas at nagkulong sa sarili niyang silid.