Chapter 22 Unfinished Love
"Do you still love him?"
Kairo's questions hang between them like a knife.
Zephyra opens her mouth. Closes it. The reality is complicated. Messy. Not the clean answer he deserves.
"I do not know what I feel right now." Her voice is small. Sincerely, "I am confused.Irritated. Unhappy. Everything at once.
Kairo's jaw works. "That is not an answer."
"It is the simplest one I have."
They sit in silence. The café buzzes round them. Life continuing while their’s fractures.
Finally, Kairo stands. "I want air. I will wait outside."
He leaves earlier than she can prevent him.
Zephyra stares on the envelope Felix left. Her past offering her a future. But what type of future? And at what price?
She picked up her phone. She nearly calls Kairo. Put the phone down. He needs space. She needs clarity.
Neither seems possible right now.
Ten minutes pass. Maybe fifteen. She pays the Bill. Steps out of the door.
Kairo leans against the café wall. Arms in pockets. Face unreadable.
"I am sorry." The phrases feels inadequate. "For all of this."
"Don't apologize for his choices." Kairo's voice is tired. "However, I want to know something. And that I want the fact."
"Ok."
"Do you wish things had been different?" He looks her in the eye. "Do you wish he'd stayed? That you'd built that life with him instead of this one with me?"
The question cuts deep. Deeper than she expected.
"Sometimes" The honesty tastes like betrayal. "Not because I don't want this. I want you. But because I spent so long wondering 'what if.' So long thinking I wasn't enough. And now I know the truth. That it wasn't my fault. That he loved me. That we could have had everything we planned.”
Kairo nods slowly. "So where does that leave us?"
"I don't know." Tears spill again. "I don't know what I'm supposed to feel. How I'm supposed to process this. He broke me. But he also loved me. And now he's offering me everything I once wanted."
"Besides you are married to me." His voice cracks. "Or does that not matter anymore?"
"Of course." She reaches for him. He did not lean back but did not lean in either. "You matter. This matters. What we have built matters."
"But?"
"However I want time to think. To reason. To discern out what closure sincerely mean."
Kairo's expression shutters. Goes cold. "Take all the time you need. I'll be at the hotel."
He walks away.
Zephyra watches him go. Her husband. Her present. Her choice.
But Felix is her past. Her past love. Her unfinished business .
And she doesn't know how to choose between moving forward and understanding where she's been.
She walks. No destination. Just movement. Paris streets blur together. Memories on every nook.
That café where Felix first kissed her. That boutique wherein they spent hours sketching. That bridge where he promised that they would change fashion together.
Ghosts everywhere.
Her telephone buzzes. Text from Kairo: "I really love you. Whatever decision you make, just know that I love you. However, I can't compete with a ghost you've been mourning for five years. So figure out what you want. Who you want. After which tell me the truth."
The message breaks something in her chest.
She finds herself at Notre-Dame. Sits on a bench. Stares at the cathedral.
A tourist couple takes selfies nearby. Young. In love. Believing they're invincible.
Like she and Felix once were.
Like she and Kairo are now.
were?
Her phone rings. Felix.
She nearly doesn't answer. However closure means dealing with the whole lot. Not just the easy parts.
"howdy."
"Zephyra." His voice is gentle. Hopeful. "I recognize I ambushed you today. I'm sorry. That wasn't fair."
"No. It wasn't."
"However I meant every word." He pauses. "I have spent five years regretting leaving you. Five years building a career however feels empty. And once I heard you got married, I thought maybe I might have lost my chance."
"You probably did lose it, Felix." The words wonder at her. But they are right. "Five years in the past while you walked away. While you chose for me rather than with me."
"I know." His voice cracks. "However, can't humans get second chances? cannot mistakes be forgiven?"
"A few can." She watches the couple walk away hand in hand. "People change us too much. Smash us too much. And we turn out to be different humans."
"Are you saying there may be no saying for us?"
"I am saying I don't know who 'us' might ev be anymore." She wipes tears with her unfastened hand. "You are remembering a girl who doesn't exist. And i am looking at a man who harm me in ways I'm still healing from."
Silence stretches.
"What about the business proposal?" Felix's voice turns professional. Cautious. "That's separate.. from everything else. It is a real possibility, Zephyra. Your expertise deserves Paris fashion Week."
"Is it really separate?" She asks. "Or is it another way to get me to come back?"
"Both." His honesty is surprising. "I won't lie. I want you back. But I truly believe in your work. In what we could create together. Even if it is simply professional."
The envelope continues to be in her purse. Unopened. Waiting.
"I want to go." She stands. walking closer to the hotel. "I want to speak to my husband."
"Will you at least look at the proposal?" Felix sounds determined now. Scared. "Before making a decision? It's everything you've ever desired professionally, Zephyra. Don't let our past steal your future."
The words echo Dalia's. Distinctive context. Same message.
"I will have a look at it." She promises. "However I am not promising anything else."
She hangs up. Walks faster.
Kairo. She needs Kairo. Desires to look at his face. Needs not to forget why she chose him. Why does she keep choosing him?
However whilst she reaches the hotel room, she finds him packing.
"What are you doing?" Her voice is slightly a whisper.
He doesn't look at her. "Giving you space. I am going back to New York. You stay. Figure out what you want to do."
"Kairo, no—"
"I can't watch you pick between us, Zephyra." He later meets her eyes. "I can't sit down right here whilst you make a decision if your first love deserves a second chance. So I am taking myself from the equation. Make your desire without me influencing it."
He zips his suitcase. Heads for the door.
"Wait." She grabs his arm. "Please don't go. I want
you here."
"Do you?" His voice is hollow. "Or do you need time with him?"
How does she answer while she does not know the truth herself?