ELLIE
“Ellie?” he called, making me open my eyes.
Then I realized I was sitting on the shower floor, curled up. I wondered how much time had passed.
Seconds? Minutes? My head was throbbing. I tried to find the strength to tell him to go, but deep down, that wasn’t really what I wanted.
And then everything hit me all at once. The tears broke free, spilling uncontrollably, and I began to sob. I could barely breathe.
I heard the door open, and a second later he was in front of me, on his knees, trying to pull me into his arms.
“No. No,” I sobbed, trying to push him away. “Just go!”
“Shhh... I’m here.” His arms wrapped around me. “It’s going to be okay.” Leaning back against the wall, he cradled me in his lap. “Shhh... I’m not going anywhere. It’s going to be okay.”
No matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t stop crying. With my head resting on his chest, I gave up the fight. I didn’t have the strength to resist anymore. I was exhausted.
Gradually, his scent and the warmth of his body began to soothe me, easing the pain just a little.
*
I don’t know how much time passed before I finally calmed down. But when I came back to myself, we were still on the floor.
It was hard to accept the pain and the fact that it wasn’t going away anytime soon. All I wanted was to forget and pretend none of this was happening.
I just wanted to sink into his scent and warmth, into the comforting and familiar feeling of home that he brought me.
“Ellie?” he murmured, as I nestled my head into his neck, breathing him in deeply. “It’s cold here. You need a warm shower and then some rest.”
“She's dead...” I whispered, the memory bringing a twinge of pain.
I felt his body tense beneath mine.
“I’ll never be able to talk to her...”
“Shhh... Don’t think about that now.” He stroked my hair.
I didn’t want to think. I just wanted to forget for a while.
I just needed something to make me forget. And there was something tempting right in front of me.
Bracing myself on his shoulders, I adjusted myself, straddling his lap as I looked into his eyes.
*He’s still here. Even if just for a little while... he’s still mine.*
My heart was racing, and each beat seemed to ache in my soul. With my fingers, I traced the lines of his strong face, admiring him. Then, I leaned in to kiss him.
“Ellie...” he murmured, stopping me when our lips were just about to touch.
“Make me forget,” I whispered.
He kept his gaze on me, hesitating, as if questioning whether this was a good idea.
“Or just go,” I said finally.
I waited for a reaction, and when none came, I braced myself against the wall to get up. But before I could, he pulled me back against his body.
His arm wrapped possessively around my waist, and his hand gripped the back of my neck, pulling me into an urgent, hungry kiss.
I got lost in his firm, wet lips, feeling desire take over my body as I sought relief in his kiss. Desperate to forget, desperate to lose myself. Desperate to feel anything other than pain.
Hurriedly, we stripped off our clothes, and I began grinding against his cock, feeling the desire throbbing between my legs, growing more urgent, leaving me breathless.
His hands moved over my curves, exploring and teasing.
In that moment, this was all I needed. To feel his touch, his bare body, his warm skin against mine, to feel his tongue claiming every part of me. I couldn’t wait any longer.
Opening his pants, I held him in my hand and slowly slid down onto him. Then he was inside me, filling me deeply and deliciously, making me forget everything but the pleasure.
Every inch of him filled me with immeasurable pleasure. My reason started to slip away. Holding his face in my hands, I began to move, looking into his eyes.
His hands explored my back and hips, urging me on, and his lips trailed along my neck and breasts, sending shivers through my entire body.
The touch of his lips and hands sent waves of heat over me, setting my skin on fire. Leaving me increasingly desperate, as the sensation built up inside me, growing stronger and more delicious. I wanted more. I needed more.
I don’t know where I found the strength to keep moving, but I didn’t stop. I kept going with fervor, pulling his hair and running my hands over his chest and shoulders, leaving my marks on his skin.
I kissed him eagerly, savoring his taste, and bit his lip as my body was overtaken by a wild, raw pleasure that pushed away any thought of pain or anything else.
I surrendered to the climax, which rose up my spine, sending waves of pleasure over my skin, making it pulse, until it exploded right where he was hitting, deep inside.
My whole body trembled, and my mind dissolved in ecstasy. With parted lips and feeling dazed, I could still feel Ethan moving beneath me.
But soon I felt his entire body tense, and he joined me, resting his forehead against mine, breathless.
The sound of our breathing filled the room, and I could feel his heart pounding hard.
It all happened so fast. Only then did I realize how much I had missed him.
Thoughts of what would happen next threatened to invade my mind, but I pushed them away.
I still wasn’t ready to return to reality. A reality filled only with pain and the knowledge that Ethan would leave me soon.
Some time later, he helped me shower and then lay with me in bed. We remained silent the whole time. But deep down, I knew we were just trying to avoid the inevitable.
He was only trying to comfort me, but he would leave eventually. And once again, I would be left with my heart in pieces.