Chapter 11—Steven

Sweat creased my brow as I rolled off Madison and onto the mattress. I was having a bitch of a time catching my breath after that little episode. Madison folded her hands on my chest, propped her chin on them, and smiled at me. It was like a sucker punch to the gut. “I’m convinced you’re trying to kill me,” I said, putting my arm around her.

She laughed. “At least you’ll die doing something you love.”

More like someone. My brain came to a screeching halt. I. Did. Not. Love. Madison. I was mildly infatuated with her, and I was hooked on the sex, but I was not in love with Madison. Why that thought entered my mind was terrifying. Change the subject to something more comfortable. “Can I ask you a question?”

“Sure.”

“Why do you stop me from getting you off with my fingers?”

“What does it matter?” she said.

I tightened my hold on her when she tried to move away. “I’m just curious.”

She settled by my side, her head on my chest, and her arm draped over my stomach. And just like that, I was cuddling. It wasn’t so bad. I pulled her a little closer and kissed the top of her head.

“I’ll tell you, but then you have to answer a question for me.”

Good sense told me to run like hell, but that meant I’d have to let her go, and I didn’t want to do that. “Okay,” I said.

“The first guy I ever fell in love with, the same guy who took my virginity, decided about a year into our relationship that he wanted to try out a Dominant/submissive type of thing. I was naive, didn’t know any better, and I loved him, so I went along with it.”

I gave her a gentle squeeze and closed my eyes. I wasn’t sure I wanted to hear the rest of what she had to say.

“I didn’t like the control he had over my body. I started to resist the only way I knew how—I wouldn’t allow him to make me come. Now I guess I just have an issue letting go. I’m afraid to lose control of myself.”

I gritted my teeth. That bastard had stripped her of control, made her afraid to enjoy something as wonderful and natural as an orgasm. “But you don’t have any problems during sex,” I said.

“No, I don’t. And I don’t know why that’s so easy for me. Could you imagine if I told you to stop in the middle of sex?” She laughed.

“Now that would kill me.” I stroked my fingers up and down her bare arm, loving how she felt tucked against my side, her hair falling over my arms and chest. “Will you let me try something later?”

“Wait a minute,” she said, smiling. “Is Steven Lane making plans to stick around here for a while?”

She had me on that one. I tried to look despondent, but I couldn’t stop the smile that pulled at my lips. “Would you rather I leave?”

“Don’t go putting words in my mouth.”

I pulled her up the length of me so that her face was inches from mine. “Well, what can I put in your mouth, then?” I asked, sliding my tongue into her mouth, relishing in the way she responded to me—always so hot and eager.

“Mmm, that’s good,” she said, her eyes still closed.

“Just good?” I pushed her onto her back and leaned over her, taking possession of her mouth again. I reached for her breast, and she swatted my hand away.

“Uh uh,” she said. “You owe me an answer first.”

“Ask away,” I said, rubbing my thumb over her kiss-swollen lips.

“Why all the one-night stands?”

I should’ve seen that coming. It was the last thing I wanted to talk about, but she had opened up to me, and now it was my turn. Besides, the sooner I answered her the sooner I could fuck her again. “The last serious relationship I had I was sure it’d be the one. I loved her. The day I proposed to her, she laughed at me. She told me I wasn’t marriage material, and the only reason she’d kept me around so long was because I was good in bed.”

Madison put her hand on my cheek. “I’m sorry, Steven.” There wasn’t a hint of pity in her eyes.

“It’s been nothing but one-night stands since then. They’re safe.”

“Don’t you ever want more?” There was so much wonder and compassion in her words and her gaze. I wanted to bare my soul to her, but quickly pushed that thought away.

“If you want another answer, you’ve got to give me something else first,” I said playfully.

“Like what?” she said with a laugh.

What the hell was I doing here? Cuddling, engaging in pillow talk, laughing, and not having sex? I never should’ve come back here. I was in way over my head. A faint knocking sound drew my attention. “Is that the door?” I asked.

She pushed me off her, got out of bed, pulled on a long-sleeved button-up shirt, and went to answer the door. I realized she hadn’t put on panties. That little… What if it was a guy at her door? I jumped out of bed, yanked on my jeans, and stood by the bedroom door.

“Hey, what’re you two doing here?” Madison said.

“Well, you didn’t come back the other night, so we figured it must’ve been pretty bad.” It was Jessica’s voice.

“I brought ice cream.” Vanessa.

“Thanks, guys, but now really isn’t a good time,” Madison said.

“Did you go talk to Steven like we told you to?” Jessica asked.

Madison had talked to Jessica and Vanessa about me? What I wouldn’t have given to be a fly on the wall that night.

“Yes, I talked to him,” Madison said.

“Well? What did he have to say for himself?” Jessica asked.

“Did you tell him he was being a jackass?” Vanessa asked.

I smiled.

“No,” Madison said with a chuckle.

“I believe the exact phrase she used was pathetic pussy,” I said, walking out of the bedroom, shirtless and shoeless. Three sets of eyes widened at me, and I smiled.

“I was right, wasn’t I?” Vanessa smiled and looked at Madison.

“Right about what?” I asked.

“Nothing,” Madison said, a beautiful pink blush coloring her cheeks.

“Come on, Vanessa,” Jessica said. “This looks like a private party. Can I have a minute, Steven?”

I nodded and followed Jessica outside. I could tell by the look on her face that she was going to lecture me.

“It’s none of my business what you two have going on in there, but that girl wears her heart on her sleeve. Try not to hurt her.”

“I’d never intentionally hurt anyone, Jess.”

“I know. Just be careful, okay?”

“Okay,” I said, giving her a hug.