Chapter 4 The Accidental First Touch
That night, the house felt colder than usual. Aveline switched on the only lamp in the living room; its yellowish light highlighted the silent, dusty furniture. The wall clock ticked slowly, piercingly, as if mocking the solitude she was feeling.
Adrian had not come home. The hands of the clock had already passed eleven p.m.
Aveline stared at her phone screen, her fingers hesitantly typing a message.
Aveline: "Are you still at the office?"
The message was sent. A few minutes later, a 'read' receipt appeared. But there was no reply from her husband.
Her chest felt tight. It was like talking to a wall. Cold, hard, and unresponsive. She tried to convince herself that perhaps Adrian was busy, or asleep in his study as usual. But a small part of her knew her husband was intentionally avoiding communication with her.
She closed her phone, pulled the blanket up, and sat on the edge of the bed. Beside her, the bed was still divided into two worlds. One side that was once warm with Liam's small laughter, and the other side now empty, holding only cold, folded fabric.
She closed her eyes, trying to remember her son's face. The little laughs, the soft hair that often stuck to her cheek, and the gentle call, "Mama..." But the memory came with pain. And that wound bled again tonight.
Tears silently trickled down. She looked towards the bedroom door, as if hoping Adrian would appear and hug her, or at least look at her. But the door remained closed, silent like most other nights.
In the silence, suddenly another face appeared in her mind. Ezra. For some reason, the name seemed to turn slowly in her thoughts, like a note that was never fully played.
The young man... there was something strange about him. His gaze was too deep for an ordinary student. His smile was soft, yet concealed something that made Aveline unable to stop thinking about him.
She stared at the ceiling. Ezra's face crossed it, faint as a shadow. She tried to recall where she had seen that face before. There was a sense of familiarity, like a lost memory at the edge of her mind. But the more she tried, the blurrier everything became. Until finally, sleep quietly overtook her.
The following morning, the sun broke through the thin curtains of the room. Aveline was ready to leave for campus. She wore a white shirt, a soft gray skirt, and a thin scarf to keep her neck warm. She tried to look calm, but the image of Adrian's face, who hadn't come home last night, still clung to her mind.
Upon arriving in class, the air felt more alive. Students began to arrive, carrying colored paints, brushes, and canvases. Aveline tried to smile as usual. Today they would continue the assignment of painting human expression. Something she knew was difficult for most of her students.
Yet amidst the crowd, Ezra sat in the corner of the room, staring at his empty canvas.
He looked different today. Neater, but there were faint dark circles under his eyes. As if he hadn't slept either.
"Good morning, Miss," he greeted her in a low tone as Aveline walked past him.
"Good morning, Ezra," Aveline replied softly.
She tried to ignore the sudden irregular beat of her heart. She walked to the front of the class, explaining face proportions and the play of light. But every time she looked toward Ezra, the young man looked back, making Aveline flustered. His gaze was gentle, almost too calm for a young man.
When the class ended, most students began to pack up. But Ezra remained, neatly tidying his canvas and brushes. Aveline was moving some large canvases into the corner of the room when her foot nearly tripped over a lamp cord. Instinctively, Ezra quickly stepped forward to help her.
"Miss, be careful..."
His hand reached out, and they touched.
It was only for a moment. But the world seemed to stop revolving around them.
Aveline's fingers brushed against Ezra's. Warm, strong, yet gentle. A subtle electric current traveled from her fingertip to her chest. She froze in place, unsure whether to pull her hand away or remain still.
Their eyes met. Ezra stared at her, deeply, almost without blinking.
There was something in his eyes, a mix of faint sorrow, but also something else... something that made it hard for Aveline to breathe.
"Thank you," Aveline said, almost whispering.
Ezra only nodded, but a small smile on his lips made Aveline's blood strangely rush. She quickly pulled her hand back, feeling her face warm.
"Sorry," she said nervously.
"It's alright, Miss," Ezra replied gently.
Ezra didn't say anything else, but he remained standing there, looking at Aveline with his keen eyes. Aveline didn't know how to respond. She only stared at Ezra a few seconds longer than she should have, before finally pretending to be busy cleaning up the watercolor paints on the desk.
A few minutes later, she looked down, realizing her heart was still beating too fast.
She needed air right now. She needed distance from the young man.
Under the pretense of needing to use the restroom, she left the room. Her steps were quick, but her mind was chaotic. Inside the toilet stall, she looked at her face in the mirror. Pale. Her eyes were trembling, and her cheeks were still flushed.
"What just happened..." she muttered.
She touched her chest, trying to calm her uneven breath.
It felt ridiculous. How could just a brief touch make her feel like this? She was a lecturer, not a teenager falling in love for the first time. But the flutter was real. And that strange feeling refused to disappear.
Ezra's image appeared in her mind again. The look in his eyes, the tone of his voice, even the way he said "Miss" so gently. There was something that made her want to know more, but on the other hand, a small fear began to grow in her heart.
Maybe this was just because she was lonely. Yes, that was it. She was lonely. And Ezra... was merely a reflection of an unhealed sense of loss.
But just as she was about to splash water on her face, something inside her whispered.
"You know this isn't just loneliness, Aveline."
She stared at her reflection again, longer this time. Her own eyes looked foreign, like those of another woman trapped between grief and something dangerous.