Chapter 161: And I needed them too.

Chapter 161: And I needed them too.
~Lyra's POV~

The moment I stepped through the gates and into the lands of Salvatore, everything I had been holding together started to fall apart.

My legs felt weak, but it was not from the journey or the giving birth of Arianna but from bone deep exhaustion.

The near death experience, the thought of losing Ragel and never seeing again, the thought of losing my child.

I swayed gently, losing balance but Ragel caught me before I could fall and held me close, his arms wrapped around me and our Ari.

I could feel him watching me, for what's it worth, I found I could suddenly sense him in our bond.

I could feel his fear and worry that he might not have done enough but when I looked at him, he looked normal as if nothing was happening.

A silver haired man and lady appeared beside us as the gates sealed completely behind us.

From their appearance, I could tell immediately that they were gods because I could sense the power I felt in that orb with them.

“ Kaeldran, we should escort them,” the silver-haired male said, looking excited.

His expression reminded me of Cael. Ahh… yes, Cael was alive and a god. How that was possible was a mystery but I am happy he is okay regardless.

I don't think I would have been able to survive that realm if it weren't for Cael.

“ Shut up, Theron. You know we can't,” the female one said. He acted like an elder sister to the male one but I doubt they were siblings.

"The realm is sealed," the female one called Kaeldran said. She was looking back at where the gates had been, her expression sour. "Hades cannot escape now and will never escape that realm. He has ruined his chances."

She turned to me and bowed slightly. It was strange to see a god bow to anyone.

"You have my gratitude, blood moon born," she said. "You freed a god from imprisonment and that is a debt we do not forget."

Before I could respond, she and the male god were fading, their form becoming translucent.

"Wait," Ragel said, he beckoned to the male one called Theron. He looked down at him waiting for what he had to say.

"Will you come back?” Why was he asking that? Hasn't he had enough of gods meddling but I didn't say that.

It wasn't anyone's fault that I got deceived by Hades.

Theron shook his head slightly to Ragel’s question, looking sad.

"We must return to the god realm," he said. His voice was gentle but sorrowful as if he didn't want to leave. "Divine law demands it. We have intervened enough in your affairs. The rest is for you to handle."

He looked at me and I saw pity in his eyes and regret.

"I'm sorry," he said, sadly. "For all of this. For Hades. For the blessing Selene gave you without proper guidance. We gods don't always think of consequences and assume you all will be alright."

What should I do with that apology? Well, I didn't know but I wanted to know what I could do with the power I had now.

"What do I do?" I asked, trying to stay conscious but my voice was already getting weaker. "What will happen to me next?"

"Siofra will help," Theron said. He was already fading more, his form becoming see-through. "She owes you a debt as well. The gods remember those who save us."

Kaeldran was almost completely gone now, just a shimmer in the air.

"Take care of each other," she said. Her voice was echoing, becoming distant. "That is what mortals do best."

And then they were gone, Theron waved his hand as he disappeared and the world turned upside down.

The next thing I knew, we were standing in front of the palace which looked like it was on fire before being quenched.

Smoke was rising from the buildings. The sound of gunshots echoed across the grounds.

There were bodies scattered everywhere. The palace was under attack while we had been in the abyss realm.

"What…" I started but I could barely speak. My throat felt dry and my chest felt really tight.

"Battle," Ragel replies, softly. He looked away from me to assess the environment.

None of the other provinces or even the nobles would know that war was ongoing in the palace because the other places in the kingdom were safe and secure.

Ragel beast taking over to deal with the threat. "It seems they attacked while we were gone."

Among all of us, only Ragel and Seraffim looked any bit unbattered with injuries. The rest of us were very hurt.

Seraffim fell in step beside us, her eyes were still red from all the crying she had been doing and always constantly peeking at Darius.

I am guessing since they are bondmate, she could literally feel his pain.

She had even tried to give him her blood to drink but Darius refused saying he didn't want her to be hurt after we came out of the Hades' realm.

"Give me your daughter my queen," she said to me. Her voice was kind but firm. "You need to focus on getting inside, you look like you might fall apart.”

She wasn't far from the truth and I didn't want Ragel looking more anxious than he was already feeling so I hid my fatigue but it was getting to me.

"You can take her," I whispered.

The moment Seraffim took Arianna from my chest, the baby made a small sound of protest. But Seraffim held her close and promised, "I have her. I have you both."

I didn't know if she was talking to me or Ari but I turned to walk toward the palace entrance but my legs gave out.

And everything went sideways.

Ragel caught me before I hit the ground, his arms shaking and wrapping around me, to hold me up.

"I've got you," he whispered. "I've got you. Stay with me."

"Something's wrong," I managed to say. My voice sounded so far away. "Ragel, something's burning inside me."

"I know," he said. He was running, carrying me toward the palace now. "I know. We're going to fix this. Just stay with me."

How did he know? We made it inside the palace and immediately, soldiers started cheering.

"The queen is back! The king is back! The queen is back!"

"Get the healers!" someone screamed. "Now! The queen is injured!"

But I wasn't because of my injury. This felt different and I couldn't explain it.

The palace corridors were blurry around me. I caught glimpses of Tivel holding a small boy with red hair and green eyes.

I caught sight of a man looking at Tivel like she was his entire world. I caught the smell of blood and smoke and fear.

But mostly I felt like I was burning alive inside me. I knew the reason why.

It was the blood moon blessing that Selene had given me that was eating me alive from the inside out.

Just like Hades, when he gave power out to people and it ate them alive without proper care was the same thing that happened to me.

So does this mean I was going to die? But I didn't want to die.

I want to see Ari grow and take care of her. “ You won't die, I promise you, that,” Ragel whispers to me. I could feel his fear and self loathing in our bond.

I wanted to reach out and tell him that I didn't blame him but I didn’t.

He laid me on a bed and I lost count of time.

Hours passed. Maybe days. I couldn't tell anymore.

I kept slipping in and out of consciousness. In the moments when I was aware, I could hear voices around me.

Ragel's voice saying my name over and over like it was a chant.

A woman's voice, maybe the healer—saying things like "her body temperature is critical" and "I don't know how to stop this."

Then I would slip away again. During one of these episodes, I saw someone I have never seen in my dream since I lost her.

My mother. She was standing at the foot of my bed, looking at me with eyes so full of love that it made my chest ache.

"Mama?" I whispered, I tried not to cry, I must not cry, I was a mother myself now.

"I'm so proud of you, Lyra," she said with a sad smile. Her voice was warm and soft like I remembered. "So proud that I do not know what words to use. You were so brave."

"I'm dying," I told her. The words came out weak and the tears broke free. "The power is killing me."

"You're stronger than you think," she said. She reached out like she wanted to touch me but her hand passed through me. "You always have been,my sweet girl. Even when you didn't believe it yourself."

"I want to stay," I said. "With you. With Ragel. With my baby, Arianna. I want to live."

"I know," she said. And then she was fading, disappearing back into whatever place the dead go. "Hold on, my daughter. Hold on."

I tried to follow her but something pulled me back. Back to the pain and burning alive.

And back to reality, my eyes were but I could make out Tivel's purple hair and eyes that were welled up in tears.

“ Tivel,” I choked out, my voice hoarse.

"My queen," Tivel replies, coming close to my bed. I couldn't make out what she was saying for a while until I forced myself to concentrate.

"My queen, please don't leave us. Please fight and be alive. I am so sorry, please don't leave us. Fight my queen."

But I couldn't fight anymore.

The pain was worse than giving birth. So much worse. Birth had an end point, a moment when the baby came and the pain stopped.

But this was endless. This was consuming. The power had nowhere to go, burning through me, destroying me from the inside.

I wanted to scream but I didn't have the strength to.

I also wanted to tell Ragel goodbye but I couldn't form the words.

I wanted to see Arianna one more time but my eyes wouldn't stay open for long.

All I could do was hold on to the memory of my mother's face and Ragel's voice and the feel of my daughter in my arms and hope that someone, somewhere, could save me.

Because if I died, if I left them here, Arianna would grow up without her mother.

Ragel would lose his mate. And Tivel, who was crying nearby, would lose the only person who had ever truly been kind to her.

So I held on, even as the fire consumed me, I held on. Because they needed me.

And I needed them too.