Chapter 154 Losing respect - Miguel POV
I knock on my father's office door, the place practically deserted, most employees have taken the high road and left. Cargill and Partners has gone down the drain, and no matter how hard Father tried to keep some of the long standing clients, nobody wants anything to do with a rapist and now accused murderer, even if he is dead.
I feel some sadness when I open the door and see Father sitting behind his desk with his head in his hands, looking utterly defeated. This is the backlash I didn't want. In a perfect world, Ben would have paid for his crimes alone, and the rest of us who are innocent in all of this would go on with our lives.
But that's only wishful thinking. The truth is, Father is broken. Everything he worked for all of these years, pushing my mother to the side, taking me from her. All of that, was for nothing. The firm has gone down, and there's nothing he can do to save it.
"Are you happy now?" He asks from his hands before he lifts his head to look at me with a forlorn expression.
"Happy for what,exactly?"
"Isn't this what you wanted?" There's defeat in his demeanour, and maybe I should get mad at what he is saying, but it hurts to see him like this. "First you didn't even wanted to become a lawyer, going against everything I asked of you, then you somehow got involved with your brother's ex-fiance. Him being dead serves what you want, doesn't it?"
I withhold my words. He is speaking from a place of grief, and I shouldn't take to heart what is coming out of his mouth right now. He loves me, I know he does. I have taken hits for him that he doesn't even know about.
"Now Ben is dead, so you can have her, and live happily ever after. And this..." He waves his hand around the office. "This is all over. Everything I worked so hard for all these years, my name, my reputation. It is all ruined."
"I am not going to apologise for Madison." The hurt bleeds into my voice, "After everything, I think I deserve some type of happiness and she makes me happy."
Father chuckles humorously. "Just like that, huh? The world is crumbling around us and you're talking about your happiness. How selfish of you."
"Maybe I should've been selfish a long time ago." I hit back. "I saw her first! Then your psycho of a son came in to sweep her off her feet because he could never just let me have something for myself! I drew the short end of the stick in your house every single day, and you never even noticed."
"So everything is my fault." He holds his arms out. "All of this is on me?"
I shake my head, telling myself he's just too hurt to see what is right in front of him. But then again, he's always been blind, only seeing what he needs to for his own gain.
"I'm moving out today." I should've been gone the same day Ben was six feet under. "I bought a house a while back, I'm going to ask Madison to move in with me."
He looks at me like I've completely lost my mind. "Just like that? You want to annihilate the last bit of respect this family still has."
"It doesn't have any respect left, Dad." He scoffs at the use of the endearment. "Take your losses and move on. Even without this firm, you have more than enough money to last you ten lifetimes. Stop the toxic cycle here. This life didn't do any of us any good."
We're supposed to uphold this legacy, and for what? To marry people we don't want to? Pursue careers that destroy us? Who made these rules? Which Cargill decided that this is what all of our futures looked like?
"Do you think this is about money?" Father asks incredulously. "I fucking sacrificed everything for this firm and this family. All my blood, sweat and tears lives here, and I should just close it and call it a day? Where's the dignity in that?"
"The dignity is in letting go when you have no control over the outcome." Maybe I'm being too hard on him. Right now, he feels like he's lost everything, and that's a terrible place to be.
Yet, I know what that feels like. Only, I was a child when I had this feeling, and I had nobody who protected me, who looked after me.
"I'm going away for a few days." I straighten my tie, happy that I won't have to wear one every day very soon. "Good luck here."
I was going to stay and help him sort things out, but he doesn't deserve that. I didn't want things to end up like this, but these are the repercussions of someone's actions that I'm not taking responsibility for.
So I turn around, leave my father there, and walk out of the Cargill firm for the last time.
The only thing I can't leave behind, is the constant anger brewing inside me.