Chapter 105 Into reality
"Kev is so pissed off!" Mom's hand flies dramatically in the air, my aunt riveted to every word she says.
"And he was standing there in his underwear?"
"Yes!" Mom's eyes widen. "And guess what!"
"What!"
It's downright comical.
"He has a tattoo of pointes on the inside of his arm!" Mom points at the location on her arm where she spotted the tattoo. "My jaw was on the floor!"
"You're lying!" Aunty looks at me with shock in her eyes. "I knew it! I asked you that day he was at my house if you two have something going on! No man just gets a tattoo of you!"
"It's not of me." I comment drily.
"It might as well be!" Mom shrieks. "Guess what happens then!"
"There's more!"
"I tell them to get dressed so we can talk, then they only come out like half an hour later, with their hair wet and swollen lips!"
"They fucked!" Aunty slams her hand on the table counter. "No other explanation."
"And I have to keep the peace, because Kev wants to fuck him up!"
I sigh and cross my arms. "Mom, you do know that Miguel is an ex-SEAL, right? He could kill Dad with a flick of his wrist if he wanted to. That was him showing Dad respect."
I can't tell them that I've experienced first-hand how dangerous he could be.
"Respect!" Mom looks highly offended. "He was telling us off! Saying he will be back and hope we won't be in his way! That's not respect!"
I shake my head. I'm not going to win this argument. My parents think Miguel is bad for me, and I disagree. I feel more like myself now that I saw him. I even made an appointment to see Simon at our Chinese spot.
I don't know if I'll confess and tell him Ben is behind this because of me, or that I went through the same thing.
All that I know is, is that I'm not feeling as gloomy as I did before he came.
I know they're going to keep me on lockdown now, like I'm some kind of kid that is rebellious.
Luckily, T.J. saves me from all the drama when he comes to get me.
"You ready?" He asks me.
"Yes." I roll my eyes at Mom who glares at me.
"T.J., if you see Miguel Cargill anywhere close, you order him to leave!" Mom says adamantly.
T.J. chuckles and salutes them.
"Care to tell me what that was about?"
"Mom and Dad came home earlier than planned on Saturday and found Miguel here." I sigh. "One would swear it was Ben the way they're acting."
T.J. throws his arm over my shoulders and kisses me brotherly on the side of my head. "I can't exactly blame them. You've been a zombie these past few weeks, it's good to have you back."
I don't say anything to that, I know everyone was probably scared out of their minds because of the way I was acting.
I don't think anyone blames me, not after Mom told me about what happened to her. I think they're just trying to protect me.
And maybe they should.
Because I need protection from the depths of the feelings I possess for Miguel.
It's becoming overwhelming. It's like an itch underneath my skin that I can't satisfy unless he's near.
It could become dangerous. People aren't supposed to feel like that for another human being.
Feelings like that could destroy me, because what if all of this comes tumbling down like a house of cards and he ends up hurting me?
I wouldn't survive that.
I almost turn back around at the restaurant when I see Simon sitting there looking so lonely and clearly broken.
I did that.
But I don't turn around, because I have to fix what I broke.
"Hey." I say hesitantly at the table, and he looks up, dark circles underneath his eyes, making me feel even more like shit than I already do.
"Didn't think you'd pitch up." His eyes go down to his drink again.
No getting up to give me a hug.
"I'm sorry I ghosted you." I take the seat opposite from him. "I was.... Going through some things and I just didn't want to talk to anyone."
His eyes meet mine, and I wish I can take the pain away and bring the old jovial Simon back.
"Not even to me, who was in the hospital?" He shakes his head. "That was real shitty of you, I wouldn't have done that to you."
Do I do it? Do I tell him? Would he forgive me then?
My chest burns with trying to hold in the emotion, and I gulp, not wanting the damn tears to start flowing while we're in a public place.
I grab his hand across the small plastic table and squeeze it. "I abandoned you when you needed me the most. I will never forgive myself for that. But when you were drugged, and my uncle came to tell us about this drug that's doing the rounds, I realised I was drugged too. A couple of months ago already, and I just didn't know how to navigate that."
Simon's surprised eyes meet mine. "What?"
"Yes. I couldn't remember anything of that night, and I didn't understand because I didn't even drink that much."
"Same." He squeezes my hand back. "I think it was Robert who did it. I can't believe I fell for him."
I take in a deep breath, feeling like a damn coward, but I should be honest with him. He deserves at least that.
If he doesn't want to be my friend afterward, I deserve that too.
"It wasn't Robert, Simon." I shake my head. "We think Robert was blackmailed into doing it."
"Blackmailed by who?" Simon looks confused.
"By Ben. He's trying to destroy me, and now he's targeting people I care about." I close my eyes briefly, trying to mask how much this is really impacting me. "I'm so sorry Simon. This is my fault."