Chapter 57 chapter 57
I stayed. The choice tore through me like shrapnel but I could not leave him bleeding and broken because of me. Could not walk away when he had risked everything to save my life.
"You are an idiot," I whispered as I helped the doctor ease Damien back onto the table. "You could have died."
"Would have been worth it." His voice was weak but his eyes held mine with an intensity that made my chest ache. "You are worth dying for."
"Do not say that. Do not ever say that."
The doctor worked quickly and stitched the torn artery while I held Damien's hand and felt him squeeze through the pain. No anesthesia because he needed to stay alert. No complaints even though sweat soaked through his shirt and his jaw clenched tight enough to crack teeth.
When it was over the doctor gave me instructions about wound care and antibiotics and told me Damien needed complete rest for at least three days. Then he left us alone in the small room with the fluorescent lights buzzing overhead.
"Alexander will come for Mia," I said. "He will punish her because I did not go back."
"I sent men to watch her. If anyone gets close they will intervene." Damien shifted and winced. "She is safe. For now."
"For now is not good enough."
"It is all we have." He pulled me down to sit beside him on the narrow bed. "Talk to me. Tell me what you are thinking."
"I am thinking that loving you is going to get us both killed. That every choice I make puts someone I care about in danger." Tears burned my eyes. "I am thinking that maybe I am not strong enough for this."
"You are the strongest person I know. You have survived things that would have broken anyone else." His hand found my face and his thumb brushed away a tear. "But you do not have to be strong all the time. Not with me."
Something inside me cracked. All the walls I had built to protect myself crumbled and suddenly I was sobbing into his chest while he held me with his good arm. All the fear and pain and exhaustion of the past weeks came pouring out in ugly desperate gasps.
"I am so tired," I choked out. "So tired of pretending. Of lying. Of being someone I am not."
"Then stop. Just for tonight stop being Lisa the spy or Lisa the survivor. Just be Lisa." He pressed his lips to the top of my head. "Just be mine."
We stayed like that until my tears dried and my breathing steadied. Until the weight on my chest felt a little lighter.
The safe house Damien's men brought us to was small but clean. A bedroom with blackout curtains and a kitchen stocked with basic supplies. Windows that locked from the inside and exits mapped in case we needed to run.
I helped Damien to the bed and changed his bandages while he watched me with an expression I could not read. Soft in a way I had never seen him before. Vulnerable.
"You should sleep," I said. "Your body needs rest to heal."
"Stay with me. Please."
I climbed into bed beside him and he pulled me close despite the pain it must have caused. His heartbeat was steady under my ear and the rise and fall of his chest slowly lulled me toward sleep.
"I love you," he whispered into the darkness. "I know I have said it before but I need you to really hear me. I love you more than I have ever loved anyone."
"I love you too." The words came easier now. Like something I had been holding back finally set free. "I love you and it terrifies me."
"Good. Love should terrify you. It means you have something to lose." His fingers traced patterns on my back. "And I promise you I will do everything in my power to make sure you never lose me."
We fell asleep tangled together and for the first time in months I felt safe. Truly safe.
The next three days passed in a blur of wound care and stolen moments. I cooked simple meals and Damien ate them without complaint even though we both knew my cooking was terrible. We talked about everything. Childhood memories before The Syndicate. Dreams we thought we had lost.
"I wanted to be a teacher," I told him on the second night. "Work with kids who had nobody. Make them feel like they mattered."
"You still could. When this is over."
"When will it be over though? When Alexander is dead? When The Syndicate falls?" I shook my head. "There is always another enemy. Another threat."
"Then we make our own ending. We decide when enough is enough and we walk away." Damien reached for my hand. "We could disappear. Change our names. Take Mia and start over somewhere no one knows us."
It sounded like a fairy tale. Beautiful and impossible. But for a moment I let myself imagine it. A house with a garden. Mornings without fear. Just peace.
On the third day Damien's color returned and he could walk without grimacing. The wound was healing faster than expected and the doctor pronounced him lucky when he came to check the stitches.
My phone had been buzzing nonstop with messages from Alexander. Each one more threatening than the last. The final one came that morning. "You have 12 hours to return or I start cutting pieces off your sister. Your choice."
"I have to go back," I said. "Today."
"I know." Damien walked to a drawer and pulled out a small device no bigger than a coin. "Wear this. It has a tracker and a microphone. Military grade. Undetectable by standard sweeps."
"What if they find it?"
"They will not. But if you feel compromised swallow it. It will pass through your system in two days but until then I can monitor where you are." He pressed it into my palm. "This is about making sure I can get to you if things go wrong."
I stared at the tiny device. So small but it felt like a lifeline.
"Thank you," I whispered. "For everything."
"Come back to me. That is all the thanks I need." He pulled me close and kissed me. Deep and desperate like he was trying to memorize the taste of my lips. "Promise me you will come back."
"I promise."
But we both knew promises meant nothing in our world. Knew that good intentions got people killed.
I left before I could change my mind. Before I could choose him over duty and damn the consequences.
The Syndicate warehouse looked exactly the same. Gray concrete and shadows and the smell of oil and metal. But something felt wrong the moment I walked through the door. A tension in the air that made my skin prickle.
Alexander was waiting in his office. He did not stand when I entered. Did not smile or acknowledge my presence beyond a cold stare that could freeze blood.
"Where have you been?"
"The rival faction took me hostage after the meeting with Dimitri. I escaped when they moved me to a different location." The lie came smoothly. Practiced. "I have been hiding until I was sure they were not following me."
"Interesting story." Alexander opened a file on his desk. Thick. Full of papers and photographs. "Care to explain why three witnesses saw Damien Kane and his men shoot their way into the factory where you were held?"
My heart stopped. "I do not know what you are talking about."
"Do not insult my intelligence." He slid photos across the desk. Damien carrying me out of the building. His men forming a protective circle. The getaway cars speeding away. "Which means either he still cares about you or you have been working with him all along."
I forced myself to look at the photos. To keep my face neutral even though panic clawed at my throat. "He was there for his own reasons. Probably trying to use me as leverage against you."
"And you just happened to escape from him too? How convenient."
"I am resourceful. You know that."
"What I know is that you are lying." Alexander leaned back in his chair. "I have been very patient with you. Very generous. But my patience has limits."
"I am loyal to The Syndicate. To you."
"Then prove it." He pulled out another file. Even thicker than the first. My stomach dropped when I saw my name on the tab. "I have been investigating your background. Your family. Your past. And I found something very interesting."
He opened the file and the world tilted. Inside were photos I had never seen. Documents I thought were destroyed. Records that should not exist. Pictures of Damien and me together. Years ago. Before The Syndicate. Before everything fell apart.
"You knew him before," Alexander said softly. "Long before you claim to have met him."