Andy's POV
When we finally entered the car and fell into the same silence, Jason started the engine and pulled out of the parking lot. None of us wanted to say anything and everything was awkward but it was impossible to ignore. We had to talk about it somehow. The kiss. The way he had touched me. I could not get over it, I turned around and stared out the window, trying to distract myself and push my thoughts away.
I did not know how much time had passed before Jason finally spoke, breaking the silence.
“Do you mind us getting ice cream?” He asked in a soft and casual voice. He sounded as if nothing had happened between us and he had not crossed the very boundary we had created.
I was taken aback and I took my eyes off the mirror to look at him. “Ice cream?”
“Yes,” he let out as he looked at me before focusing on the road once again.
“There is this place that has amazing ice cream. Thought maybe we could stop, clear our heads.” he suggested.
I wanted to decline because I felt like I needed to stay away from him after everything that had occurred. But I loved ice cream and I could never say no to it. It was one of my favorite things and maybe it would help me breathe properly again.
“Okay,” I agreed quietly.
He gave me a small nod and I turned back to the window. After a while, he drove into the parking lot of a small yet beautiful ice cream spot. It looked like a place that if you didn’t know about, you’d never find- it was at the corner of the road and I was surprised someone as busy and sophisticated as Jason knew somewhere like that. I hoped the ice cream was as amazing as the place looked.
We got out of the car and walked to the shop. Jason was walking beside me and I could feel the tension radiating off of him. His presence was both comforting and overwhelming.
When we got inside, we each ordered a cone, and Jason led us to one of the small tables outside. The weather was cold but not too cold and the breeze blew through my hair. We just sat there, not saying anything, everywhere was silent save for the sound of cars outside, people talking around us and the sound of spoons clinking against their glass.
I scooped a spoon my ice cream and as it melted on my tongue I could not help but let out a small moan. It really was as good as the place looked, Jason raised up his head to look at me and I saw the way his eyes darkened.
“Easy tiger” he said and my cheeks grew hot.
“I just hope you would not run away and avoid me this time like you always do,” Jason suddenly said with a low voice as he looked away from me and I was stunned.
His eyes were back on the ice cream in front of him.
I swallowed the knot in my throat as the weight of his words settled in on me. I always ran. Every time things between us got too close, too real, I found a way to distance myself. But this was different. There was no running from what had happened today.
“I won’t run away,” I finally said to him, my voice barely audible as I looked at my melting ice cream.
“But… I need space. I need time to think about all of this.” I said.
He nodded, not pushing. “That’s fine by me.”
We didn’t say anything else, we just sat there, eating ice cream as I tried to gather my thoughts. There was so much to think about, I needed to figure this whole thing out- the feelings and Bree and just… everything. God, Bree.
“If we do go through with this… whatever this is,” I began slowly, my voice hesitant, “What about Bree? I'm worried about her”
Jason’s brow furrowed slightly, and he looked over at me, his expression thoughtful.
“She’s very important and her opinion matters,” I explained to him as I tried to calm my nerves. “She might not like… the situation. Scrap that. She won't like the situation”
Jason sighed, running a hand through his hair. “I know. I love her so much and even if our relationship is just getting better, I know deep down, she actually cares about me. And you too. She might be hurt” he said and I nodded in agreement.
I wasn’t sure about that. Bree wasn’t just his daughter; she was my best friend. This wasn’t some small secret I could keep from her. This was big. Life changing.
We fell into another silence again and I finished up my ice cream and I thought about his words over and over again. When we were finally done, Jason paid and we headed back to the car.
When we got to the car, I fastened my seatbelt and when I looked at Jason, his mouth was open like he wanted to say something but he closed it and focused on the road as he started the car.
I knew he had something to say. We both knew there was more to say.
Once we were back in the car, Jason broke the silence again. “About Bree,” he started, his voice softer this time.
“I don’t want to hurt her. I never do. But if I am being honest Andrea, I have never felt this way. Not for anyone else and not even… Bree’s mother.” he said.
I turned to look at him and my heart started beating faster as I heard his words. His voice was filled with honesty and his confession caught me off guard.
He sighed as he tightened his grip on the steering wheel. “You know, Bree’s mom… she left right after Bree was born. I’ve never told Bree much about her, and she never asks, but… it wasn’t pretty.”
I stared at him, surprised by the sudden mention of Bree’s mom. Neither him or Bree had ever talked about her. And I could tell he was finding it hard to talk about this but he continued.
“We were young,” he continued, his voice laced with regret. “We made mistakes. We just wanted to have fun but ended up pregnant. She left after she gave birth to Bree and not once have I heard from her since then. Sometimes I wonder what I could have done differently and I wish I could turn back the hand of time but it’s impossible. You just… live with it.”
I didn’t know what to say to him so I just remained silent and let him talk.
“I’ve been alone ever since,” Jason admitted. “Even the whole thing with Violet… it was just one kiss, and nothing else. I did nothing but focus on work so I could give Bree the best things of the world but in my doing so, I neglected her and was never around.”
I could hear the guilt in his voice and how he blamed himself for not being there when she needed him.
“I understand how you feel,” I finally said to him in a quiet voice. “I honestly do know how it feels like to be alone.”
He turned to me slightly with soft eyes.
“My parents died when I was very young,” I started, my voice barely audible. “Car accident. It was tragic. My brother and I survived, but… it was never the same after that. My brother, he threw himself into work. And hr did everything he could to make sure I was not lacking anything, to provide for me and give me a good life. And he did. But he barely had time for me too and now he is abroad and we barely ever talk because he’s always busy. I miss him.”
Jason’s eyes softened and I could see understanding coursing through him. I didn’t know why I told him that but I just felt compelled to.
“I’ve been alone too,” I added. “Even if my brother was there, I still felt lonely.”
The car fell into a silence again but this time it was a comfortable one as we drove back to the house.