chap27

(After Few months)

Kate

I looked like a fat buffalo damn my stomach is so huge that I can't even

looked at my feets. Alex parents laughed about it and say that im carrying a

Robbins baby so it's normal.

I do notice that whenever the topic of my pregnancy came along Alex become

guarded and very tense like my baby is becoming more real to him.

Some things have changed like he now never left the bed when we have sex and he do ask for my appointment but never visit one of the appointments.

Those moments make me believe how firm he is about his decision regarding

my baby girl. He never ever asked about the gender of the baby but he do

notice the things happening around him. Like his mom and Rachael helping me setting a nursery. Rachel has become a good friend of mine n in every visit

She brings pink nursery stuff and clothes.

The nursery is not big, it's a tiny room but since it's near my room I'm ok with it. My father does visit our home to take Emma to his house or park but never he asked about my baby and me but he somehow became a little bit civil . He greet me and then ignored me which is fine by me but when I saw him with emma how he changed to caring and loving grandpa I also want this for my daughter but I know its my wishful thinking

Doctor has told me to be ready next month when my little girl will come into this world and I'm so scared will Alex be there for me? will he hold my hand and hold our child for the first time?

Alex has gone to my father's house to pick emma. Me and Martha are preparing dinner. Since I can't stand not more than 5 minutes I'm using a stool mostly to do daily household chores. Martha being great helps support me at max but it's night time turns out to be most difficult when it's difficult for me to go to loo or to even take a turn.

My feets are killing me. They are so swollen and even I breath a lot when I walk around a little.

Everyone told me how their husbands helped them out during their pregnancy and I clearly remember how Alex used to dott on Emily when she had Emily. Like a dog guard he used to follow Emily's routine and Emily used to laugh how all night she used him as her personal masseuse.

But in my case Alex ignores everything. And honestly speaking I don't even ask him because of the fear of rejection.

I was lost in my train of thoughts that I flinched when i heard emma loud voice

and she started running and hugged me tight.

Alex admonished her 'Careful Emma, don't hurt your mom' and pass me a smile

I laughed ' Hi my fireball ... hold on a little let me sit I can't even see you

when you hugged my leg because of my huge tummy'

Emma giggled and I started to get up from my chair with an effort but all went in vain. My pregnancy is proving a little difficult to me day by day especially when I have to sit or have to stand.

I called Martha 'Hey Martha can you help me little'

Alex who was busy on his phone looks up and raise his brow

'Yes Kate' Martha smiles

'Can you pick me from the chair. The chair is little deep and its taking troll on me' I laughed nervously

Alex open his mouth to say something but then he looks away

Emma also jumped 'i will also help you mama'

I smiled and my baby with the help of Martha held my hands and picked me up. We three giggled cause small things like that becoming a funny issue for me

But then Emma dropped the bomb ' when will the baby come out of your tummy mama'

I see Alex was standing there and he become tense when he heard about baby

but he say nothing

I replied 'Soon baby very soon'

Alex said he will take a shower. I have a feeling something is wrong but

I don't know what.

Alex

Kate's pregnancy is becoming more real to me more day by day and it's unsettling. I will never get the award of husband of the year because i'm not a supportive husband to her in her pregnancy. I saw how she winced when she sat or stood... how difficult it is for her to turn in and go to the bathroom at night. How are breathing changed when she walks and takes a support of any chair or table to stand and in some day how are feets become so swollen that she can't walk properly and how she rubbed her shoulders and gave herself those small massages to soothe her pain.

Even when I see her like this I realize what shity person I am. I remember

When Emily was pregnant I used to spoil her so much. Give her the every

support she needs. She used to demand me to massage her back and shoulder and I loved those moments. If I ever treat Emily in such a way I was treating kate. Emily would have killed me but kate never complained

once. She just smiled and never shared her pain with anyone and I dont what can be more heartbreaking that she is going through all of this all alone without sharing ehr real feelings with me.

I made a promise that Emma is my priority and no ones going to take her place. Especially when today Emily's mother cried in front of me and said how much she missed Emily and after Kate gave birth .. emma will be neglected

I told Mona that no one neglect her but when Emily mother said I should

give Emma to her and live my life with a new family. I become shocked how dare she take my emma from me

She said ' Alex dont take it in a wrong way but this way emma will be

loved more and you will have a new family too... you think you know kate but no one knows better than me... once her baby is born she will

try to make you loved the baby more n this way emma will be neglected'

I replied ' No Mona... this will never happen ... I told Kate and I'm telling you Emma is my only heir to the Robbins no one...'

She said ' Then promised me ... that you will always put my dead child

daughter first and no one else... '

I looked uncomfortable but I somehow the words come out in my mouth ' I

promised you '

Kate

Martha was in the kitchen when I came to get Alex coffee. She looked to me

and said ' Kate I want to tell me something '

I picked her hands and said ' yeah Martha .. everything is ok ?'

Her eyes got moist ' Actually no... My daughter 's husband had an accident and he is alright but my daughter needs me... she has called many times to come to her... but I can't because I can't leave you in this condition... but her kids are so small and they need me...

I stopped her and said ' Martha why don't you tell me before of course you can leave and plz tell me if you need anything.... Now go and pack your stuff and don't worry about me... I still have time'

She hugged me and said thanks.

I picked Alex up and went to his office. He was staring at his laptop screen. I

put his coffee on the table and touched his hair that was growing a little bit . He looked and gave a hesitant smile and moved to look at something on the screen. I moved to stand beside him. Am I bothering you?

He looks up 'I'm busy but you can't bother me' and kissed me

I play with his hair ' Come one you can work some other time let's get back to bed' I give him a suggestive look and can see it was working

But then he passes me a look of sorry ' Im sorry I have something to finish this work ... you go and sleep'

I start massaging his shoulders and rubbing my hands on his neck then I

said ' everything is ok Alex... you look at little tense'

He was quite for a moment.. then he said .. ' everything is fine... just a

work....

He stop but I know he want to say something else

He looked reluctant and said ' Actually I want to tell you that I have a meeting this week but it's in Canada... I was delaying this but no I can't it's very important'

I become shocked and said ' Alex you can't leave me alone in this

pregnancy... you know my dates are closer'

He gave me one of his guarded looks ' I said I can't delay this anymore...

and besides you know who want this baby more'

Here it comes again. I'm stupid to bring my pregnancy in front of him but

Still he is going to leave me alone?

He looked uncomfortable about what he said and then he says ' kate you still

have time don't you? I'm going to be away at least for a week and then come back and you won't be alone but this is important trust me'

I give him a week smile 'I don't like it when you go for days'

He said 'Me too but I will try to be back soon...'