Part 29

Part 29
My lips pressed together as he waited for my answer. I couldn't think anything straight, couldn't even manage to look at his face without guilt crawling my body. How was he so calm about it? Why was he not scared about facing his fiancee?





"You're upset" He mumbled, turning to face me. Of course, I was upset. I was angry at myself and how stupid I was to lose control and sleep with him again.





"Aria" He softly whispered, his voice hesitant as he tried to come closer. It spurred me even more than I could imagine. Unable to hold myself I opened my mouth.






"Of course I am fucking upset" My voice was shrill and loud even to my own ears. The throbbing in my head was intense and my own voice was ringing in my ears. It made me wince.





Edward looked like he was slapped, obviously not expecting me to answer him. It had to be said because I was letting myself fall into the same trap again. Only this time his fiancee was involved.





He tugged at his hair, tucking them behind before staring at me. My eyes couldn't avert from his attractive face. The sun rays falling on his face made him look angelic. Even though he just woke up he had no sign of drool on his face. Freaking genes.





"Why are you upset?"




I dumbly stared at him. My mouth opened and closed, hoping that I won't say anything I regret later. How was he even asking the question when he very well knew that it was wrong? Whatever we did was going to affect both of us but from the look on his face, he seemed calm and collected. As always.





"How are you not? I slept with my boss. Do you even realise how bad it looks?"




He flinched at my voice, taking a few deep breaths before staring back at me. His eyes kept shifting towards the door of the bedroom. I followed his stare and was thankful to see that the door was locked. At least we were not that wasted.





"Aria you make it sound so crude" He sighed, rubbing his face with his palms. I gaped at him, with my eyes slightly widened. It was stupid to have a conversation with him when we both clearly were having hangovers.





I realise that we were still naked under the covers, my hand gripping the sheets closer to my body. I looked over his shoulder to look for my dress when I spotted it around the corner. Just great! I thought.






"Aria" He gritted his teeth again at the lack of my reply.





I took a deep breath, "It is crude that's why. We should've never went through with it. It was stupid and irresponsible on both our sides"





My chest rose and fell as those words left my mouth. He froze, his face resembling that of a kicked puppy. I felt my chest clench fully knowing that I was the reason behind it. But he needed to know that. Last night was nothing but a mistake.





He swallowed loudly, "You regret it, don't you?"




I averted my eyes away from his, unable to look at him any longer. I really wanted to say that to his face without feeling guilty. Some part of me enjoyed it, pretended that everything was fine between us and he was a lovely stranger I met. At that moment I couldn't think about anyone else but the thought of being closer to him. It was pathetic how quickly I was putty in his hands. Let him do anything he wanted.





"Yes," I quietly said and heard him sharply breathe at the answer. Trying not to look at him directly I stared at his shoulder blades, my vision flickering at the painting on the wall. It was pretty, a girl leaning down while the boy was trying to chase her. But with very Van Gogh colours and style.




"Oh" That's all he said




"I mean... What about Sara? How are you so calm right now?" I probed, curiosity getting best of me.





His snapped his head towards me and finally met my eyes, "Is that why you regret it? Only because I have a fiancee?"





"That doesn't answer my question" I huffed, trying to seem firm and unaffected. Everything inside me was curious to know about his lack of guilt or any sort of emotion. Did he even love Sara? I tried not to think about that because it would just make matters more difficult.





"What exactly do you want me to say?" He snarled, his lips pressed firmly and jaw clenched. His eyes looked fierce as they bore into me and I could feel my skin heat up at the intensity.





"Why don't you feel guilty?"





"How do you know I don't?" He retorted




"It's clear on your face Edward" I snapped, my mouth slipping his name just like I used to do before. His eyes narrowed at my sudden change in tone but he didn't point out.




"Geez what, are you a counsellor now?"




"No-"




"Then don't tell me how I feel"




"Fine be an asshole then" I scoffed pushing the sheets away from my body. He let out a defeated sigh. As soon as my feet touched the cold floor I winced but didn't stop. I could feel his eyes on me as I got up from the bed. My body was shaking from the amount of anger I was feeling towards him. So that's why I couldn't even feel shy about prancing around in his room.





He was quiet as I bent down to retrieve my panties from the edge of the bed. After pulling them I clipped my bra and walked towards my dress, all while his eyes following me.






"Seriously you're leaving?"





I put on a fake smile and turned towards me, "Am I missing something? I don't recall you asking me to stay"





"You're so infuriating"




"Pot calling the kettle black. Nice" I smiled slipping in my dress, his eyes digging into my back.





"Fine let's talk" He huffed pulling the sheets off and slipping on his boxers. I tried not to stare at him even though I could see him clearly through the mirror in front of me.





"What makes you think there's anything we need to talk about? We were drunk and we slept together. That's it" I shrugged bending forward and picking my clutch. Dread and shame-filled me as I noticed that I had several missed calls from Ashton.





"Are you serious right now? It's not just that" Edward growled as he came behind me. I turned around to face him.





It felt like a déjà vu standing in front of him. Only that it was me who was rejecting him and turning down whatever he wanted to say. It made me feel that it was payback for what he did. Karma is a funny thing at that.






"What is it then?" I blinked my eyes at him, a smirk tugging at the corner of my lips. At that moment I felt powerful like everything was under my control. I could do anything and no one would question me. Is that how Edward felt all those years ago? When he said that it was just a one-time thing and he wasn't looking for a relationship.






"I- This cannot be it. I mean there's definitely something between us. Don't you feel it?" He questioned, his eyes hopeful.





I chuckled, shaking my head at his words. Like something had taken over me at the moment and all I could think was of the payback. Feel the rage of being alone, waiting for him to realise his mistake. Stupid and naive.





"Nope, there's nothing Edward. Just too many drinks" I patted his cheek and ducked down to pick my heels from the edge of the bed.




"That's not what you mean" His wrenched voice rang in my ear but I didn't let it affect me.





I gave him a sweet smile, aware of the way his shoulders slumped and he looked like someone crushed him. At that moment the rush to make him feel sad and let him experience that pain was too much. It just took over me and I couldn't stop.





"Sorry but that's exactly what I mean"





Edward's voice cracked, "Why are you doing this? Is it some kind of payback?"





My feet froze on the ground at those words. Did he figure it out that I was faking about my memory loss? I tried not to let my face slip as I stared at him. Surely there was no way he found out. He might be bluffing.





"What payback? I have no idea what you are talking about" My voice unknowingly cracked a bit and I clenched my eyes shut, angry at myself.






He stared at me for a few seconds as if he didn't believe my answer. Even I would do the same if I was him, to be honest.





"Uh...never mind" He shook his head as if it sank him that I lost my memory and had no recollection of our past.




"I'll see you later in the office" I casually smiled as I slipped in on my heels. He hummed, not really paying attention and his eyes looking at the floor. I could see that he was trying to hold back whatever he was planning to say.





"Yeah" His voice trembled as gave me a weak smile, his arms defensively crossed against his chest.





Without waiting any longer I immediately slipped out of his room. The entrance was easy to find but the red solo cups on the floor made me clench my eyes shut. It truly was a wild night from the amount of litter on the floor. The trail continued till the pool. I tried not to stare at the tables where we both were sitting.






As soon as the cold air hit my body it made me realise. My car was in plain sight so I shakily unlocked it and sat in. My fingers trembled as I remembered Edward's eyes digging into me till I left his room. How could I do that to him? Crush him so mercilessly?





I ruffled for my clutch in the car to search for my phone. I couldn't do it. I couldn't just drive away because my entire body just felt cold and numb. I needed someone.





Ashton was the first person in my dialler list so I immediately called him. He didn't pick until three rings.





"Hello?"




"Ashton" I breathed




"Aria hey are you okay-"




Tears left my eyes as I refused to cry. I shook my head as if he could see me but then realised my mistake. Swallowing the lump in my throat I mumbled a quiet 'no'





"I think I fucked up"