Chapter 69 Impossible

Chapter 69 Impossible
Theon.

Time goes on, one day, two more days, and Callista lays abed. The marks on her skin fade by the day, but I can still see them as bright as the day they were inflicted on her.

The more Callista lies unconscious, the more I loathe myself. I take to neglecting my own health as a way of punishing myself subconsciously, and only realize this when my Beta and Gamma come storming into the hospital room to inform me that I’d missed more than four meals and had not gotten any sleep.

“You can keep doing this to yourself, Theon.” Kellin chides as he manhandles me out of the hospital room into the hospital cafeteria. “Don’t think we don’t see what you’re doing here. I understand how painful this much be for you, but it’s no reason to treat yourself like shit.”

“I deserve worse. She’s there on that bed because of me. I put her there.”

“Punishing yourself is the worst way to do that.” Kellin’s tone is fatherly, like he’s talking to one of his kids more than his Alpha. “I know you’re tempted to do it because you think suffering is the best way of punishment, but let me tell you it’s not. To me, that seems like the coward’s way out.”

I can’t help but flinch at that. Kellin noticed this but kept barreling on. “If you’re truly sorry for what you did, you’re going to look after yourself enough so when Callista wakes up, you can be there for her to help her get better. You’re going to grovel for what you did, and you’re going to earn her forgiveness. You’re the Alpha King, Theon, it’s time you start acting like it rather than being a petulant teenager about this. You cannot afford to be selfish now, and this?” He waves his hand in my general direction. “This is being selfish.”

It hurts to hear but in my heart of hearts, I know that Kellin is telling me what exactly I need to hear, not what I want to hear. Rules are different for kings and leaders. We cannot afford to be selfish.

After that, I try not to let myself wither. I return to my duties and restart being the Alpha King, start paying attention to the diplomatic affairs because we did attack a werebear pack, although nothing really had come up from that front yet. I make sure that my pack is well-protected in case the werebears decide to attack us.

In the meantime, I also find time to visit Callista every day. And during each of those visits, I allow myself to wallow in the guilt.

Every time I look at Callista, all I can think is that I don’t deserve to be her mate. She deserved someone who was good enough for her, who had never committed the crimes I’d done. How unlucky was she to be saddled with someone like me?

How can I be her mate after all this? Will she even consider it, on the off chance she does end up forgiving me?

“But she’s mate,” My wolf urges, confused and sacred. It takes a lot to terrify my wolf, who is a force to be reckoned with in his own right. And he had loved Callista from the start, even if Callista’s wolf was not present. “No matter what, she’s mate.”

His voice is adamant but filled with hope as well.

“How can I stand to look at her like this?” I whisper to him, “My actions led to her torture once again.”

“If you refuse mate,” my wolf insists, “Mate will be hurt again.”

“Didn’t you hear Dr. Haeger, he said she’d never be the same again.”

“Have faith,” My wolf consoles me. “Call witches, get help. Heal mate.”

“I already did. I called them all.”

The Witches Guild had been enraged. Apparently, black magic was as taboo as a stealer was, and the witches promised me that they would immediately investigate the Brekett pack for such forbidden practices. They’d also told me to get Callista to meet them as soon as possible.

I will be doing that. I will do anything to make sure Callista returns to the girl she was before this all happened.

Even though I’m supposed to be sleeping enough, I can only do so for a few hours. Most of the night, I just stay awake by Callista, staring out of the window of her room, gazing into the night. The full moon shines serenely, basking the Rexellen forest with her glow. Stars dot the sky around her. It's a serene night, so unlike the mood that prevails in the castle. 

I pray to the Goddess to help Callista. I pray to her, begging her to right my wrongs and return her to her former self.

Sometime later, unknowingly to myself, I fall asleep.

Dr. Haeger’s voice wakes me up the third morning since I’ve taken to sit vigil by Callista, and I return to the world of the living with a jolt. I look around in alarm, trying to place where I am.

My eyes fall on Callista. It’s an automatic response by now. She’s my priority, even if I’m barely conscious. For a moment, I hoped, desperately, that she’d woken up.

But no. She lies still, and my disappointment is immeasurable.

“You should’ve gone home, Theon.” Dr. Haeger murmurs, voice soothingly like I’m on his patients as well. “I don’t think she will wake up anytime soon. You’ve been here every night. Don’t you miss your bed?”

I shake my head. “I can’t. I need to be close to her, please don’t try to talk me out of it. I need to be there when she wakes.”

Dr. Haeger sighs. He’d been dealing with my family for long enough to know how stubborn we all are.

“At least you got some rest.” He smiles at me and turns to Callista.

I catch a glimpse of his face just as his brows start to furrow.  

“What’s wrong?” I ask.

“It’s impossible,” He exclaims. “Look at her skin.”

I follow his gaze down to the girl lying on the bed, sleeping peacefully, and my eyes widen.

Wait, what? I’ve been noticing the way her skin was healing, but last night, there had still been marks, there’d still been wounds. She still looked ragged. Callista was not a full werewolf, so she took more time than us to heal. Faster than a human, sure, but now?

“There’s gone.” I whisper, “The blood, the wounds…how?”

Her skin is back to the clean porcelain it had been before as if the horrible ordeal of the sacrifice attempt that happened had only been a dream. Her cheeks are rosy, and her body is flushed. Yesterday, she still looked like a corpse.

“It would’ve taken even a normal wolf at least a week to heal from all that damage. But she’s healed in three days.” He inspects her, raising her hands and legs to see clearly, “It’s all gone. Not a scar on sight!”

“It took her a full week to recover from a black eye before,” I remember. “Do you think this is because of the Chamber of Despair?”

“The chamber is made to break, Theon. Such magic can never be used for something as pure as healing.” He worries his lips between his teeth. “You were there the whole night, weren’t you? Did anything suspicious happen?”

“Not that I’m aware of,” I say. Were my prayers answered? Was the Goddess listening to me?

“I don’t understand this,” The doctor looks troubled, “I feel like there’s something bigger under play here, Alpha. Things like this just don’t happen.”

I stare at her.

Suddenly, without any warning, Callista opens her eyes and gasps.