Chapter 83 #83

Chapter 83 #83
Chapter 83
~ Dwayne ~

I couldn't stop seeing her.

Every time I closed my eyes, there she was, falling, reaching for me, those wide eyes meeting mine as I caught her. The way her body had fit against mine, soft and warm and perfect. The faint gasp she'd made when our eyes locked.

Her hand on my chest.

That fucking whisper: "Hi."

I was losing my mind.

"Another," I said to the bartender, pushing my empty glass forward.

Luke appeared beside me like he'd materialized out of thin air, sliding onto the stool with that infuriating grin already in place.

"Well, well," he said. "Look who's drinking alone on a Thursday night. This is either really good or catastrophically bad."

"Go away."

"That confirms catastrophically bad." He flagged the bartender. "Whiskey. Two fingers. Actually, make it three. My friend here looks like he needs company."

"I don't need company."

"And yet here I am." Luke accepted his drink, taking a slow sip. "So. What happened?"

"Nothing happened."

"Your left eye is twitching."

I pressed my palm against it. "It is not."

"It absolutely is. Which means you're lying. Which means something definitely happened." He turned fully toward me. "Spill."

I stared into my glass, watching the amber liquid catch the light. "I caught her today."

"Caught who? Shailyn?"

"She was on a ladder. Decorating the Christmas tree. Pregnant with twins and standing on a fucking ladder reaching for the top branches."

Luke whistled low. "Jesus."

"She slipped. I caught her before she hit the ground."

"That's good though, right? You saved her."

"She looked at me, Marcus." My voice came out rougher than intended. "Right in my eyes. And for a second, just one goddamn second, I thought she remembered. I thought she knew."

"Knew what?"

"Everything. That night. Us. The babies." I drained my glass. "But she didn't. She just smiled and whispered 'hi' like it was nothing. Like being in my arms was the most natural thing in the world."

"And what did you do?"

"Put her down."

"Smart."

"It didn't feel smart. It felt like ripping my own heart out."

Luke was quiet for a moment. "You're in love with her."

It wasn't a question.

I laughed bitterly. "What gave it away?"

"The fact that you're drinking alone in a bar at nine PM on a Thursday instead of being literally anywhere else." He paused. "When did you know?"

"I don't know. Maybe that night at the mask party. Maybe when I found out she was carrying my children. Maybe this afternoon when she almost fell and my entire world stopped." I turned to look at him. "Does it matter when?"

"No. It just matters that you admit it."

"Fine. I'm admitting it." I gestured to the bartender for another round. "I'm in love with Shailyn. I'm in love with my brother's wife. I'm in love with a woman who doesn't remember me, who thinks her babies belong to someone else, who looks at Dante like he hung the fucking moon."

"And it's killing you."

"Every single day." The confession came easier now, the whiskey loosening something in my chest. "I watch her feed him breakfast. Watch her take care of him. Watch her smile at him like he's worth all that devotion."

"When you know what he really is."

"When I know he's been lying to her for months. Manipulating her. Keeping her memories suppressed so she won't remember the truth."

Luke took another drink. "Have you thought about telling her?"

"Every damn day."

"But you don't."

"Because what if I'm wrong?" I turned the glass in my hands. "What if I tell her everything and she looks at me like I'm crazy? What if she chooses him anyway? What if the truth destroys her?"

"Or saves her."

"Or destroys her," I repeated. "She's happy, Marcus. Genuinely happy. For the first time since I met her, she smiles without that shadow in her eyes. She laughs. She bakes midnight cakes because the babies want them. And yeah, it's all built on lies, but at least she's not miserable."

"So your plan is to just... watch? Forever?"

"My plan is to wait."

"For what?"

"For her to remember on her own. For the truth to come out naturally. For some sign that it's the right time."

"That could take years."

"I know."

"Those babies will be born thinking Dante is their father."

"I know that too."

Luke studied me. "You really think you can do this? Watch her raise your children with him?"

"No." The word came out flat. "But what choice do I have? I tell her now, while she's vulnerable and pregnant, and risk breaking her? Or I wait and hope that when the truth comes out, she'll understand why I stayed silent?"

"Neither option is good."

"Neither option is survivable," I corrected. "But at least one keeps her safe."

"Safe from what?"

"From him. From the scandal. From having to choose between the father of her babies and the man she's been married to for five years." I downed the fresh drink in one swallow. "From me."

"Dwayne…"

"Every time I'm near her, Marcus, I want to tell her. I want to grab her and say 'those babies are mine, that night was real, I've been searching for you since you walked away.' But then I see how she looks at Dante and I realize she wouldn't believe me anyway."

"She might."

"She won't. Because why would she? I'm the brother she barely knows. Dante is the husband who's been nothing but devoted since she woke up. Who the fuck would believe me?"

Luke was quiet for a long moment. "So you're just going to torture yourself?"

"Apparently."

"That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard."

"Welcome to my life."

"Dwayne, listen to me." Luke grabbed my shoulder, forcing me to look at him. "You can't keep this up. The guilt alone will destroy you. And when she does remember, because she will remember, she's going to ask why you didn't tell her. What are you going to say then?"

"I don't know."

"Exactly. You don't know. Because there's no good answer. There's no version of this where you come out looking like the hero."

"I'm not trying to be a hero."

"Then what are you trying to be?"

"Careful. Protective. Patient." I pulled away from his grip. "I'm trying to do the right thing even when I have no idea what that is."

"The right thing is honesty."

"The right thing is keeping her safe."

"From the truth?"

"If necessary, yes."

Luke shook his head. "You're going to lose her."

"I already did. The moment she woke up with amnesia and Dante rewrote their entire history. I lost her before I ever really had her."

"So fight for her."

"How? By destroying everything she thinks she knows? By forcing her to question her entire reality while she's carrying twins? By making her choose between us?" I laughed without humor. "That's not fighting for her. That's fighting for me. And she deserves better than that."

"She deserves the truth."

"She deserves to be happy. And right now, as fucked up as it is, Dante makes her happy."

"Dante is poisoning her."

"I know."

"And you're letting him."

"Because the alternative is worse!" My voice rose despite myself. "Don't you get it? If I tell her now, while she's this vulnerable, it could break her. The shock alone could trigger premature labor. The stress could harm the babies. My babies."

"So you're choosing them over her?"

"I'm choosing all of them. Even if it kills me."

Luke studied my face for a long moment. "You really love her."

"More than I've ever loved anything in my life."

"Then you need to—"

"What??"

The exclamation came from behind us, sharp with shock.

We both froze.

Marcus's eyes went wide, locking on something over my shoulder.

Why does it seem like he has seen a ghost? Slowly, I turned.

And my entire world shattered.

She stood there, one hand pressed to her mouth. Her face was very pale. And I knew, with absolute certainty, that she'd heard everything.