Always, Julie. I’ll always be there for you, no matter what

My fingers trembled as I folded for the thousandth time that same piece of clothing in my suitcase. As much as I tried to control my anxiety, it still pulsed strongly and urgently in my chest, as if threatening to suffocate me at any time. The idea of finally being closer to finding Drew was as exciting as it was scary. Knowing that I could touch her made me tremble and full of butterflies in my stomach.

"Bella, Sophie, do you think I’m taking too much stuff?" I asked, although I already knew the answer. My mind was so restless to pay attention to the answers and the surrounding things, but their support was so comforting.

"You’re fine, Julie. Everything’s going to be fine." said my stepsister Bella, putting a comforting hand on my shoulder. I thanked them with a forced smile, wishing I could believe it as easily as they did. But the truth is that my mind was too busy with tumultuous thoughts to allow me to even relax. Finding Drew was what I longed for most, it was something I had longed for since he was taken from me, but the prospect of finally being faced with the truth, whatever it was, was extremely overwhelming, it was disturbing.

As I struggled with my own thoughts, Jordan and Ryan were further apart, talking in whispers as they consulted the documents Ryan had prepared. I watched them for a moment, wondering what they were talking about. But soon I shook my head, pushing away those thoughts and that did not matter because the important thing was that we were going to Canada, going after my son.

"I can’t wait to see Drew’s little face again," I spoke softly. I felt my eyes burn when I saw that. My friends smiled at me, sharing the excitement with me, but inside, a cloud of uncertainty passed through me creating the most diverse thoughts. Yeah, what if all this was just a false hope? What if my father was just manipulating us again? I took a deep breath controlling those thoughts. I couldn’t allow myself to think that way, I needed to believe that this clue was indeed real, that we were finally getting closer to finding my son, my little Drew.

Hours later, we were all aboard Jordan’s private jet to Canada. Bella and Sophie occupied the seats next to me, while Jordan and Ryan remained further apart, still immersed in their conversations and analysis. The hum of the plane’s engine echoed in the cabin, mixed with the lively conversation of Bella and Sophie. I tried to keep up, but my mind was elsewhere. I couldn’t stop thinking for a minute about Drew, about how he would be now, if he would be okay if he felt that there was a bond between us. It stunned me. I looked once again at Jordan and Ryan and they both kept whispering, glancing at me from time to time. I tried to ignore it, deciding to focus only on the one thing that mattered at the time: my son, and to have him with me once again. Time seemed to drag on as we flew through the sky, but finally the pilot’s voice announced that we were approaching our destination. My heart jumped, and a shiver ran down my spine. We were about to find out if this clue would actually lead us to Drew. And I was willing to do anything to find him, even if it meant facing my own father once again.

Hours had passed since the jet landed at a remote location that we had rented for the occasion. Now we met at the small motel that Bella found in her research, a place discreet and away from prying eyes. Each of us entered his room, but the weight of waiting and uncertainty still hung in the air, leaving me distressed. Sitting on the edge of the bed, I felt my mind spinning in a whirlwind of emotions. Anxiety consumed me, while hope and fear fought for space within me. It was the first time in years that I was so close to finally finding my son, and the prospect was so overwhelming. Jordan approached me, sitting beside me and holding my hand tenderly. Her touch was comforting, an anchor in the midst of the emotional chaos I was experiencing at that moment.

"Julie, everything will work out," he said, his soft voice conveying a calm I desperately wanted to feel. I nodded, trying to cling to his words of encouragement. But there was a part of me that was still apprehensive. What if all this was just another trap from my father? What if Drew wasn’t really there?

"Jordan, I don’t know if I can handle it." I admitted, my quivering voice of uncertainty. He shook my hand more firmly, looking me in the eye with sincere determination.

"Julie, you’re stronger than you think. We’ll get through this together, we’ll get through it, I promise you." His support was comforting, but there was one question that weighed on my heart from the day I went to visit my father in jail, one I had never verbalized aloud since that damned day.

"Do you think I’d be a good mother, Jordan?" I asked, my voice sounding fragile even to my own ears. He seemed surprised by the question, but his eyes conveyed an unwavering confidence as he answered.

"Julie, you are the most loving and courageous person I know. I have no doubt that you would be an amazing mother to Drew, or to any child who crossed your path. Where did you get that from?" He asked, I bit my lips and sighed.

"My father said I’m not a good mother, that since I came back to reality and found you, I’ve let Drew down." I swallowed hard, and he held it in my face.

"You are the sweetest and most faithful person I know. When you talk about our child, you speak with love and affection. Since you returned to my life, what you have done is surprise me with your determination, with your grit and courage. You, Julie, will be, and are, the best mother Drew will ever have in her life." Your words touched my heart more than he could ever imagine. Amid doubts and fear, it was comforting to know that he believed in me, that he trusted my character as a person. A comfortable silence settled between us, our hands still entwined as we lost ourselves in our own thoughts. Despite all the uncertainty that surrounded me, there was something comforting in knowing that I was not alone in this journey.

"Jordan, thank you for being here with me." I muttered, overflowing gratitude in my words. He smiled kindly, his eyes expressing all the love and support he felt for me, as I loved that man, was unwritten.

"Always, Julie. I’ll always be there for you, no matter what." And at that moment, while we were about to face another challenge together.

I knew there was no one else I would rather be with.