chapter 75
MAY.
“I suppose this means no more work then? You should see Bradford! His eyes literally bulged when you came on screen!” Ginny squeals, sorting through my closet of new untouched clothes and accessories worth more than my paychecks combined.
I try not to wear them on the outings. They feel too much. Too shiny. Too expensive for me. I don’t know if I’ll ever really fit into Ethan’s lifestyle. It’s too much. Ever since we went public on our marriage a few days ago, my phone has been blowing up with messages from people I don’t know. Party invitations, club membership invites, hangouts at places where my lips can’t work to pronounce, more interviews, tags on posts, hate comments on how basic I look beside the richest man in the city—I can’t even go out without cameras clicking.
This is what Ethan had been trying to prepare me for, but I don’t think I can ever get used to being called, ‘Mrs. Anderson’, when I damned well didn’t get married to any ‘Anderson’.
There’s also the part where Ethan doesn’t let me leave home without at least one car of bodyguards tailing me. It’s all fun and exciting when your husband is so rich, you get a black card that can’t be maxed out until you have no idea what to use the money for. Clothes? Shoes? Designer bags? I’ve never been a fan, and I don’t even get to think about it because my closet is reloaded every day like there is an unspoken rule that says I can’t ever repeat clothes. Charity? Fundraisers? Ethan’s already heading so many such projects.
It’s overwhelming me, but I can’t speak a word of it to Ethan without sounding ungrateful. He works so hard for us. The least I could do is not be a nagging woman when he’s literally fulfilling every other woman’s wildest fantasy.
Only, this isn’t my fantasy. I’ve never dreamt big. Definitely not this big.
I miss working and earning my own money. I miss being busy with something other than décor and picking out shoes for parties. I miss Ethan’s small apartment and our potted plants. I miss being able to ride my bike and feel the wind in my hair. I miss Anna. I miss the snacks sold on the streets. I miss being able to slip into crowds without being recognized or having people take unaware photos of me and posting them on social media to insult Ethan.
Even Anna is affected by this. I have no idea who leaked the info to the media. Her divorce is everywhere. “Chase Anderson’s sister-in-law files for divorce and demands full custody of four-year-old son.” I’ve apologized to her more times than I can count in the past week, and even if she says it’s fine, I know it’s not.
“I think this is beautiful!” Ginny squeals, holding up a black, glittery, floor-length dress that seems way out of my league. No way I can pull that one off.
I shake my head. “It’s too much for me.”
Ginny settles on the bed beside me, holding onto the dress. Her eyes soften as she watches me. “If you don’t want to attend, you can tell Ethan. I’m sure he’ll listen and not force you.”
Sighing, I sink further into the pillows. “I can’t hide from this forever, Ginny. This is my life now. I know he’ll understand if I can’t go with him, but I don’t want to disappoint him.”
“There’s nothing wrong with hiding, May. I do it all the time. Mother swears she’ll disown me if I run from another one of her stupid tea parties again, but you know what? Screw them, I’m not about to sacrifice my peace to make insatiable people who don’t give two fucks about me happy.” She smiles and pinches my cheek. “If you want to ditch it, we can hide out together. Wherever you want to go.”
I almost give in. Almost. But then I recall that I promised Ethan that I would be there with him while he took the Most Successful Business Man of the Year award. I purse my lips and rub my face with my palm. “I’ll need help with shoes too.”
****
My palms are sweaty, and my fingers tremble as I wipe them against the sequence of my dress. I blink, unable to stand the constant flashes of the paparazzi as I try to put one foot in front of the other. I feel Ethan’s cool fingers on the small of my back and he leans in to whisper against my ear, “Breathe.”
I obey his order, sucking in deep breaths, and I let him urge me forward, towards the swarming crowd. His bodyguards surround us, pushing aside reporters as they create a path for us. Still, a woman with a messy bun and an impeccable suit manages to slip through and I find a microphone shoved in my face.
She rattles on about which news she reports for and how excited she is that I can ‘join’ her today. I say nothing, increasing my pace as I try to outwalk her. But my heel digs into the ground under the red carpet and I all but trip, nearly falling on my knees.
Ethan catches me, his arm tightening around my waist. Embarrassment threatens to choke me on the possibility that I’ve given them a new image of me to edit and turn into a viral meme.
I straighten, with Ethan’s help, just in time to hear the woman say, “So, who are you wearing tonight, Mrs. Anderson?”
My gaze drifts to my dress and back to the reporter. I stare at her for seconds, possible replies flitting through my mind—all of which are ‘go fuck yourself’—but I reel it in and walk ahead, ignoring her. I don’t know who the hell I’m wearing. Maybe I should have paid more attention to it. Ginny did tell me while she curled my hair, but it didn’t stick.
Heat prickles my skin as we walk through the crowded hall, filled with more celebrities than I have seen together in one place before. The part that freaks me out is when they see Ethan and leave whoever they’re talking to, just to get a picture with him.
And me.
Ethan’s fingers tighten around my waist as he leads me further down the hall, a default smile plastered on his face. “Are you alright? You’re shaking.”
“Just nervous,” I say, heart hammering. I think I might be ill.
Ethan’s steel eyes flick to mine and heat. “Raise your chin, May. They’re only staring because you’re the most beautiful woman in this gathering—and you’re mine.” He inclines his head to the left. “White suit at 2 o’clock. He’s totally checking you out.”
I follow his gaze to the man, and he is indeed staring at me with appraisal and something more carnal.
“Turn a little to the left—” Ethan mutters, and I do, seeing another man with dyed green hair, who looks to be in his thirties. The man winks at me and my lips part in surprise. I laugh, despite myself, and turn to tell Ethan how ridiculous this is, but I find my husband narrowing the man a frosty look that would send even me running in the opposite direction.
His gaze flicks back to me and his lips tug down into a frown. “I should have you test the clothes in front of me before you wear them in public.”
I smirk. “I suppose I could put on a show for you…”
Ethan’s gaze sharpens. “I’m at your mercy, May. Do with me whatever you wish.”
I cackle, smacking his shoulder, and I startle when the cameras flash again. Jeez. Can’t I catch a break?
My phone suddenly buzzes and I pull it out of my purse, glancing at the screen. Anna. Ethan escorts me to a less rowdy corner of the hall and I press the phone to my ear. “Hey, sis—”
“I shouldn’t have dropped him off—this is my fault—I should have stuck to homeschooling him—but I needed to do something for me and—and now—oh God, May—”
My brows furrow and my heart slows as I hear my sister’s hysterical sobs. “Anna, please calm down and tell me what’s wrong.”
She gasps for air and her voice cracks as she says, “I came to get Finn from school, but I can’t find him anywhere. Sean took him.”