Chapter 25 : He cant control me
HAYDEN’S POV:
I told myself I didn’t care, that if Lilian wanted to disappear, that was on her.
I told myself I had tryouts, the captain announcements and Stephen breathing down my neck and I didn’t have time to obsess over whether a girl had decided to ghost me.
And yet, by the time I got home that afternoon, I had checked my phone fourteen times.
Yet, still nothing. There was no text, no “hey,” no sarcastic comment, or even a like on my story.
It shouldn’t have gotten under my skin the way it did. Lilian wasn’t exactly predictable. She was a cheerleader who thrived on drama, attention, and making sure people knew she was there.
Which was why her silence felt really loud.
I tossed my bag onto my bed and paced my room. The faint scent of her perfume was still lingering in the air, and it made my chest tighten. Was she embarrassed? Did she regret it? Or worse… Did she think I did?
The thought hit harder than I expected.
I dragged a hand down my face and grabbed my hoodie again. I wasn’t going to sit here and fucking spiral. If she wanted space, fine. But I at least deserved to know why.
Cheer practice ran right after ours. If she were anywhere, she would be at the gym.
By the time I got there, the place was echoing with music and sharp claps. The cheer squad was finishing up a routine on the mats. Lilian stood front and center, ponytail high, voice clear as she counted them through the last sequence.
She looked… fucking beautiful and confident. She was untouched by whatever weird tension had been twisting me up all day.
The music cut and the girls laughed and dropped into relaxed stretches.
I waited near the bleachers, hands shoved into my hoodie pocket. A few of them noticed me and started whispering immediately.
Of course they did. I rolled my eyes. This school thrived on gossip. I saw Ella, she glared at me and ignored me.
Lilian turned when one of them nudged her and our eyes locked.
For a second, something flickered across her face. Was she surprised, maybe even nervous but it disappeared just as fast as it came.
She said something to her team, clapped once, and jogged over.
“Hayden,” she said lightly. “Did you get lost?” Her tone was teasing, but it didn’t reach her eyes.
“Can we talk?” I asked.
The girls behind her went suspiciously quiet. Lilian hesitated for a second, then nodded. “Yeah, just give me a minute.”
She grabbed her water bottle and followed me out into the hallway. The gym doors swung shut behind us, muting the noise.
For a moment, neither of us spoke. I suddenly felt stupid for coming.
She leaned against the lockers, crossing her arms. “So?”
I exhaled. Here goes nothing. “Are you avoiding me?”
Her eyebrows lifted slightly. “What?”
“You left this morning, with no note, text. Nothing.” My jaw tightened. “You’ve been ghosting me all day.”
“I haven’t been ghosting you,” she said quickly.
“Then why haven’t you said a word after we fucking had sex, Lilian?”
She looked away and that was answer enough.
I stepped closer. “Is this because we…..” I lowered my voice instinctively, even though no one was around. “Because we slept together?”
Her gaze snapped back to mine. “Is that what you think?” she asked.
“I don’t know what to think,” I admitted. “If you regret it, just say that. If it was bad…..”
“It wasn’t bad,” she cut in firmly. The intensity in her voice caught me off, guard. “The sex wasn’t bad,” she repeated, softer this time. “I had a fucking good time.”
Something in my chest loosened, and I tried not to smile. “Then what?” I pressed.
She sighed, dropping her arms to her sides. “Well, Stephen saw me.”
The name hit like a punch. “What? What does that have to do with anything”
“This morning. When I left.” Her voice tightened. “He was in the kitchen.”
I pictured it instantly. Stephen, already dressed for the day, coffee mug in hand, was watching her walk out of my room.
“What did he say?” I asked.
“Nothing at first.” She let out a humorless laugh. “That was the worst part. He just looked at me.”
I frowned. “That doesn’t sound like him.”
“Oh, he said something,” she added quickly. “After.”
My jaw clenched. “What?”
“He asked if I was proud of myself, said hurtful words and practically called me a hoe” The words burned as she spoke. “He said I should think about what kind of reputation I want.” Her voice wavered just slightly. “Like I was some… like I had done something pathetic.”
Anger flared hot and immediate in my chest. “He doesn’t get to talk to you like that,” I said sharply.
She shrugged, but it wasn’t casual. It was defensive. “Maybe he’s not wrong.”
“Don’t,” I snapped. “Don’t fucking do that.”
She looked at me, eyes flashing. “Do what?”
“Act like you’re the only one who did anything.”
Her lips parted, then pressed together.
I ran a hand through my hair, pacing once before stopping in front of her again. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Because you didn’t call me.”
The accusation was quiet but there. I blinked. “You left.”
“Yes,” she shot back. “And you didn’t even text to ask if I got home or why I had fucking left, Hayden.”
I opened my mouth, then closed it. She wasn’t wrong. “I figured you wanted space,” I muttered.
“I didn’t,” she said immediately. “I just didn’t want to wake up to your brother staring at me like I’d ruined something.”
The tension between Stephen and me suddenly felt heavier and more complicated.
“He doesn’t control you or what you do,” I said.
“He doesn’t control you either,” she countered. “But you let him.”
That stung. “I don’t let him control me.”
“You care what he thinks,” she said plainly.
I didn’t answer because yeah, I did.
“He made me feel like trash, Hayden,” she said quietly. “And then you didn’t even check on me.”
Guilt crept in, slow and unwelcome. “I wasn’t trying to ignore you,” I said. “I just… I had practice and……”
“And captain pressure and your stupid ego and whatever shitty things you guys do,” she finished.
“It’s not ego,” I said automatically. She raised an eyebrow. “Okay, maybe a little ego,” I admitted. “But that’s not why I didn’t text.”
“Then why?”
Because I was overthinking. I didn’t know if this was just another chaotic Lilian moment or something real and I didn’t want to look stupid if you decided it meant nothing.
I swallowed those words.
“I didn’t think,” I said instead.
Her expression softened just a little. “That’s kind of your thing,” she said.
I huffed a quiet laugh despite myself. Silence settled between us, but it wasn’t as sharp as before.
“So,” I said finally, “you’re not avoiding me because it was bad.”
“No.”
“And you’re not pretending it didn’t happen.”
“No.”
I stepped closer, lowering my voice. “Then don’t let him make you feel small.”
She searched my face. “You’re going to talk to him, aren’t you?”
“Yeah.”
“Don’t start a fight, okay.”
“I won’t,” I said. She gave me a look that clearly said she didn’t believe that.
“I just… needed to know,” I admitted. “You not saying anything was driving me insane.”
A small smile tugged at her lips. “Good.”
I blinked. “Good?”
“Now you know how it feels.”
I shook my head. “You’re unbelievable.”
“And you’re dramatic.”
I pulled her closer and kissed her softly. She moaned into my lips and i could feel her smile. I calmed down my nerves i had all day, this was what I wanted and Stephen was not going to fuck it up for me.