Chapter 74 Mom: Emergency. Call me. It’s about Ryan.
We had kissed so many times, but he had never seen me like this. It was not that I had never thought about being with Cole. I just always thought I was not ready.
I did not know why I had held back for so long. But in that moment, it felt like there was no reason to wait.
Slowly, I reached for the buttons of his shirt, stained with my blood. My fingers worked them open. His eyes watched every move, his body tense.
“Saraphina?” he murmured as I pushed the shirt off his shoulders.
I nodded, just looking at him, giving my silent answer. He swallowed hard, unsure. I reached for his face and brought his lips back to mine. He groaned, his hands beginning to move over my body. They were still trembling slightly, and I found it incredibly sweet.
“Wait,” he said, pulling back suddenly. “Are you sure about this?”
I did not speak. I just kissed him again, hard, as my answer. He groaned aloud. My hands moved over his chest and stomach. He was not heavily built, but he was firm and solid under my touch. He began kissing my neck, his mouth gentle and warm. I could feel him, hard against my stomach.
He was ready. But was I?
A feeling began to creep over me. A familiar, haunting feeling. One I associated with someone else entirely.
This feels… strange. It feels wrong.
Suddenly, I was painfully aware of myself. My confidence vanished. I did not know what to do, so I panicked. And I started to cry.
Cole felt the shift immediately. He lifted his head to look at me. “Saraphina… oh, no. Saraphina? What is wrong? Did I hurt you?”
“No, just… keep going,” I lied, my voice thick.
But he stopped. He moved away. And a wave of relief washed through me.
“No. Tell me. Why are you crying?”
I could not speak. I just shook my head, the tears coming faster.
“Hey, hey, shhh. Do not cry,” he said, pulling me against his chest. “I am sorry. I just wanted to be good for you. To be what you needed,” I managed to say.
“What? Saraphina… you are good. You are perfect,” he said, tilting my face up to his.
Even like this, a crying, bleeding, broken mess, he called me perfect.
That only made me cry harder. Cole wrapped his arms around me, holding me close, one hand stroking my hair.
“It is okay. It is all okay,” he whispered.
“Cole, I wanted to. I really did, but…” I started.
“But it is not the right time,” he finished for me.
“Yeah,” I breathed.
He let out a soft sigh. “I know.”
“I am so sorry.”
“Hey,” he said, his voice gentle. “I waited eight years just to kiss you. I can wait a little longer.”
That made me smile. I buried my face in his chest, breathing in his clean, familiar scent.
“Thank you,” I whispered. “Thank you for not giving up on me.”
He did not answer with words. He just kissed the top of my head and rested his chin there.
Cole was warm and safe. His touch was a comfort. I thought I could stay like that forever.
“Cole? Will you stay tonight? Please?” I asked.
“Of course I will,” he answered without a moment’s hesitation.
He held me tighter, and I wrapped my arms around his waist, holding on just as tight. He leaned over, pulled the blankets up around us, and made sure I was tucked in and warm.
He rested his chin on my head, his fingers gently tracing patterns on my arm. We did not speak again. We just held each other in the quiet dark, and slowly, we fell asleep.
Cole, I promise you. Maybe not today, but someday… I will be all yours.
I was floating in a deep, calm sleep, curled in Cole’s arms, when I felt my phone vibrate. It had been going for a while. I stirred carefully, trying not to wake him.
I reached for my phone on the nightstand. Five missed calls from Mom. In the middle of the night. A cold dread settled in my stomach.
As if she knew I was looking, a new text message flashed onto the screen.
Mom: Emergency. Call me. It’s about Ryan.