Chapter 117 My Angel | 010
AZREN
I’m being selfish. I fucking know that. But, for once, I want to feel real peace. I need it. And she’s the only one who can give it to me. That’s why I have stalked her for months since learning that she’s my fated mate. My woman.
“Remember what happened earlier when I fell asleep without warning?” I say, and she nods slowly.
“I figured you were exhausted,” she responds, and I shake my head.
“I was beyond exhausted. Noelle, I haven’t slept in eight years,” I tell her, and her jaw drops.
“That’s impossible. You—”
I lower my gaze, clenching my fists. “Even my family doesn’t know how bad my condition is. They know I have insomnia. Just not how bad.”
Noelle gently reaches for me, her movement hesitant. She places her hand over mine. And I let her. Because I need it. It’s taking me every ounce of control to not lunge for her and ravage her like the monster I am. She has no clue.
My poor Noelle doesn’t understand. All of this is a gentle mask. Everything she has seen so far is nothing but a facade. Even on that night when I took her virginity. She doesn’t know that I had bitten my tongue off to hold back.
“Why? Tell me what’s wrong. Is it something I can help with?” She asks softly, her beautiful amber eyes filled with sympathy.
I nearly let out a laugh. Sympathy is for people with a heart. Sympathy is for people with conscience. Not beasts like me.
“When my mother was pregnant, she entered the underworld. I was in her womb then, vulnerable. Apparently, the wandering dark spirits attached themselves to me. At first, I was normal. My parents adored me. I grew up surrounded by love so thick I could choke on it,” I explain.
She squeezes my hand gently. “I was twelve when the first possession happened. I remember attacking my little sister with a fork. I convulsed thereafter. Mum took me to the witches. They did their thing. I really thought I’d gotten better. But then, the nightmares came. And so did the voices.”
It still feels like it happened yesterday. My chest tightens at the thought of it.
“I grew angry at everything. My family. The world. Myself. My fate. So I went wild and lost control. I met bad people. I did terrible things and ingested as much poison as I could consume. Just to run away from my reality. Death wouldn’t come so easily for a tribrid. My life only brought pain to others. It didn’t matter that I was also in pain. Until…the night I smelled you.”
Her eyes go wide. “Smelled me?”
I move closer until I stop right before her. She’s so fucking beautiful, it’s unreal.
“Yes. You have a scent,” I tell her, bringing her wrist to my nose.
Her cherry blossom scent hits me like a drug, my head spinning.
“That’s when I found out that you’re my mate, Angel,” I say, and she gasps.
“You mean…soulmates? You and I?”
She’s starting to sound a little too excited. It’s so adorable.
“Yes, Noelle. But it runs much deeper than that,” I say, leaning in to bury my face against her neck.
“Fuck,” I let out a breathy moan, my free hand gripping her thick thigh.
She gasps softly, her hand resting on my shoulder.
“Azren…what do I smell like?” She whispers, and I bury my face deeper, my nose brushing her soft skin.
“Cherry blossoms. So pure and perfect,” I reply, pulling her closer as I press my lips to her neck.
She lets out a soft, needy sound. I nearly lose my shit.
“And if I sleep in your bed, do you think you’ll be able to sleep better?” She asks innocently.
“Do you want the honest truth or the carefully curated lie?” I ask, pulling back enough to look her in the eyes.
Her teeth graze her pink lip for a second. Then she reaches out to cup the side of my face. I nuzzle into her touch like a cat. I can’t help it.
“I want the truth,” she breathes.
I peek at her through my lashes. Then I close my eyes, kissing her palm softly before resting my cheek there once more.
“I worry that even then I still wouldn’t be able to sleep. And worse, you wouldn’t be able to sleep either, sweetheart,” I confess.
She swallows visibly. “W-why?”
“Because, Angel,” I lock eyes with her. “We will be doing a lot of fucking, sweetheart. Sleep? Sleep will be far away from us. So, do you understand how dire the situation is, Noelle?”
She’s barely breathing now. But, at the same time, something astonishing is happening. The smell of her sweet arousal floods my nose, and I freeze.
Then I pull away and let out a laugh.
“You’re wet right now, aren’t you, Angel?” I say, and her face turns pink. Then red.
She clamps her thighs together tightly, shifting on the stool. I let out a satisfied hum, leaning in to kiss her temples and her cheeks.
“You’re fucking perfect,” I say, causing her to blush even more.
Then I straighten.
“You should get ready. I left you a dress in your closet. Wear it and come downstairs,” I utter, turning away from her.
She catches my wrist right then.
“What about the r-rules?” She stutters cutely, and I glance at her over my shoulders, amused.
Gods, I want to pinch her cheeks. But for me, letting my intrusive thoughts win is incredibly dangerous. So, I smirk.
“Be honest, you don’t like the rules either, do you?” I ask, and she shakes her head vigorously.
“I say, fuck those rules. Besides, I want to see you in my clothes more often. Although I prefer you wearing nothing,” I say, and she bites her lower lip to hide her pretty smile.
Fuck me, I’ve been down bad since day one.
“Think about it. The sharing a bed thing. You don’t have to do it. You can simply say no.”
Even if I hope that she’ll say yes.
I slip out the door before I can change my mind, heading back towards my room to get ready. My leg is still terribly sore, especially since Sabrina had to inject a mixture of wolf’s bane and silver to slow my healing.
Reaching for the railing, I limp slowly upstairs, gritting my teeth against the pain. I can’t believe I didn’t even feel the pain when I was with my Angel.
‘Of course, I knew the effort wouldn’t last,’ Aether drawls, amused.
“It’s useless anyways. She’s bound to see how dangerous I am,” I reply aloud.
‘Well, she doesn’t know that you have your high highs and low lows like a bloody bipolar invalid,’ Trent hisses behind me, and my stomach tightens.
Dammit.
A while later, we’re both at the marriage registry. My heart is thumping faster than it has ever beat before. And I can’t take my eyes off my woman. She makes the dress look effortlessly stunning because she is the epitome of beauty herself.
She must sense me watching. Her cheeks are flushed pink, her hair pulled back in an elegant bun with strands of her hair on her face. She isn’t even wearing makeup. Just my lip balm, which she asked to borrow. I need to spoil her. I won’t be able to breathe easy if I don’t.
Once she signs her own part, she exhales and turns to face me.
“It’s done, husband,” she says, a tiny smile tugging at her lips.
A wild rush of heat roars through my veins at her statement.
“Don’t call me that,” I say sternly, trying not to let the cracks show.
She takes a step closer to me, her heels clicking on the floor.
“Why not? You like it,” she whispers.
Shit.
“It’s a literal trigger, wife. It makes me hunger for things I shouldn’t want,” I tell her.
She fiddles with her fingers. Then in the smallest voice she says, “Why hunger for a meal when you can have the whole damn course?”
No. Fucking. Way.