Chapter 82 Calls
Chapter 82 Calls
Sydneys Pov
My phone rang at 7:14am….I knew it was him before I even looked. My heart started beating. My hands moved on their own to grab the screen.
Zane: "You "
Me: "Yes."
Zane: "Can I call you?"
Me: "Now?"
Zane: "Now."
My phone rang before I could say anything
I answered.
"Hey " he said. His voice sounded rough. Like he just woke up. It made my stomach feel funny.
"Hey."
"You sound tired."
"I didn't sleep."
"Me neither."
We just sat there in silence. It wasn't awkward. It was just... Us. Like we always were when we didn't need to say anything.
"I saw the comments " he said.
"I know."
"I read all of them."
I closed my eyes. "Why did you do that?"
"Because someone should know what people are saying about you."
"You don't have to protect me Zane."
"I know I don't have to." He paused. ". I want to."
•••••
The words hit me softly.
Somewhere deep inside.
"You can't fix this " I said.
"I know."
"Then why are you calling?"
"Because I need to ask you something."
"What?"
He was quiet for a moment. Thinking. Like he always did before he said something
"How do you want me to handle this?"
I blinked. "What?"
"The photo. The comments. All of it." His voice was calm. Like he wasn't worried all. "How do you want me to handle it?"
No one ever asked me what I wanted. They just did things.. Didn't do things.
Zane asked.
Zane always asked.
•••••
"I don't know " I said.
"Okay."
"I mean it. I don't know what to do."
"That's okay."
"It's not okay. People are talking about my body like its theirs. Like I'm not a person." My voice cracked. ". I don't know how to make it stop."
"You can't make it stop."
"Then what's the point?"
"The point is you don't have to face it."
I wanted to believe him.
I'd been alone for so long that it felt like home. Alone felt safe.
"Sydney." His voice was softer now. Gentle. Like he'd talk to someone whos about to break. "I'm not going to do anything without your permission. That's why I'm asking. Tell me what you need."
"What if I don't know what I need?"
"Then we figure it out together."
•••••
It's a word.
It's a big thing.
I thought about Cole. About all the times he left me to figure things out on my own. About all the times he watched me struggle. Did nothing.
Zane wasn't Cole.
Zane was asking.
Zane was waiting.
Zane was giving me something no one ever gave me.
A choice.
"I don't want to make a scene " I said finally.
"Okay."
"I don't want people to think I'm weak."
"You're not weak."
"I know." I swallowed. ". I don't want them to think I am."
"Then what do you want?"
I closed my eyes.
Thought about the comments. About strangers feeling entitled to my body. About the world telling me I'm not enough since I was twelve.
"I want them to stop " I whispered. "I want them to look at me and see a person. Not a body. Not a joke. Just... Me."
Zane didn't say anything for a moment.
Then: "I'll handle it."
"What are you going to do?"
"Something I should have done yesterday."
"Zane—"
"Trust me."
•••••
The line went quiet.
Not dead. Just quiet.
I could hear him breathing. Steady. Calm. The opposite of how I felt.
"What if it gets worse?" I asked.
"It won't."
"How do you know?"
"Because I won't let it."
"You can't control what people say."
"No.. I can control what I do." He paused. ". I'm not going to stand by while people tear you apart."
"Why do you care much?"
"You really have to ask?"
"Yes."
He sighed. Not annoyed. Just... Heavy. Like he was carrying something.
"Because you're not invisible Sydney. You've never been invisible. People just haven't been paying attention."
". You have?"
"Yes."
•••••
I didn't know what to say to that.
So I didn't say anything.
Zane filled the silence like he always did. Not with words. With presence.
"I should let you go " I said.
"If you want."
"I have class in an hour."
"Then go to class."
"What about you?"
"What about me?"
"Are you okay?"
He laughed. Small. Quiet. The time I'd heard him laugh in weeks.
"You're asking if I'm okay?"
"Yes."
"I'm the one who should be asking you."
"You asked already."
"Then I'm asking again."
I smiled.
First time since yesterday.
"I'm okay " I said.
"Liar."
"Maybe." I paused. ". I'm going to be okay. Eventually."
"That's all I needed to hear."
•••••
We said goodbye.
I put my phone down.
Stared at the ceiling.
The cracks were still there. The lightning bolt. The road.
Today the path didn't look so scary.
Today the path looked possible.
Because someone was walking with me.
Not ahead. Not behind.
Beside.
•••••
Sally woke up at 8am.
Saw me sitting on the bed. Staring at the wall.
"How long have you been awake?"
"All night."
"Did you sleep all?"
"Not really."
She sat down beside me. Took my hand. "What did Zane say?"
"He asked how I wanted him to handle it."
"What did you say?"
"I said I didn't know."
". Then?"
"He said he'd handle it."
Sally nodded. Like she expected that. "That's not nothing."
"I know."
"That's actually of everything."
I looked at her.
She was serious. No teasing. No sarcasm. Just her. Just my best friend.
"I know " I said again.
"Then stop being scared. Let him."
•••••
I thought about that all day.
In class. In the library. In the moments between.
Let him.
Simple words.
Impossible words.
Because letting someone in meant trusting them.. Trusting them meant risking that they'd leave.
Zane wasn't leaving.
Zane was standing outside my building in the dark. Zane was reporting posts and reading comments and asking what I needed.
Zane was showing up.
For the first time in years I wanted to let him.
•••••
My phone buzzed at 9pm.
Zane: "Its done."
Me: "What did you do?"
Zane: "I posted something. On my page. About the photo. About the comments. About you."
My heart stopped.
Me: "What did you say?"
Zane: "I said people should leave you alone. I said you're the person I know. I said anyone who has a problem with you has a problem, with me."
I stared at the screen.
My hands were shaking.
Me: "You didn't have to do that."
Zane: "Yes I did."
Me: "Why?"
Zane: "Because someone should."
I put my phone down.
The comments were still there. The photo was still there. The world was still mean and unfair. It was full of people who wanted to bring me down.
“Damn”….