Chapter 25 Chapter 13 (i)
Fae
I went straight to the mall after leaving the office. I walked around, wanting to get lost in the midst of unfamiliar faces with no obligation to talk to anyone at all. I still had no intention of opening my social media accounts or calling my friends to let them know I was back in Manila. I still needed to be alone and didn’t want a pity party.
I didn’t buy anything or eat. I watched a movie—or I tried to. I left the cinema without knowing what happened in the movie. I just passed the remaining hours of the night there. When I got tired, I drove back to my condo. My bed was still in place, untouched, so I had that to sleep on tonight. Almost everything was packed, even the kitchen utensils, except for one plate, glass, and cutlery. The fridge was still running, but there was hardly anything inside except for my takeout, which I didn’t eat either.
I tried to ward off the depression and numbness by soaking in the bath. But it only reminded me of Jigo. But this was okay. I finally succumbed to it and thought of him, allowing myself to smile in regret at the memory. It had been too good with him for me not to want more of it, of him, eventually. The two-night escape with him was enough, even if my body craved more. I had one good experience to counter the bad. So when I hugged my pillow and the memory of Jigo came to mind instead of Carl, I was grateful that I could fall asleep.
I woke up to the sound of the doorbell. I tried to go back to sleep, thinking it was just my friends outside trying to find out if I was home. If no one answered, they would leave, too. But the doorbell kept ringing.
After sighing, I got out of bed. Maybe I needed company. Maybe I just had to stop moping on my own. Maybe it would be better and easier to have people help me pack the last of my things and plan what to do. If I couldn’t sleep, anyway, it would be better...
Through the peephole, I saw Jigo standing outside my door.
Before I could even think about what I was doing, I opened the door. Jigo’s impatient expression disappeared when he saw me, and his eyes dropped from my face to my body. I never had the chance to cover myself. I didn’t even think that it was a man outside my door. All my friends were girls. And when I saw him, I didn’t even think about putting on a nightgown.
I bit my lower lip when I saw the heat in his eyes. I knew he was remembering our night in his suite at the resort. I remembered it, too, unfortunately.
“What are you doing here?” I asked in a hoarse voice. I wasn’t surprised that he knew where I lived. He could easily obtain that information from anyone in the office or from Carl’s staff. But why was he here? He didn’t need to come.
“I heard from Lola Leah that you resigned. She’s really worried. She wants me to find out what you’re doing... or if you need help. In case you plan to look for work... you know? She wants you to come to us.”
I swallowed. Ah, someone sent him. I suppressed the feeling of disappointment. I shouldn’t feel it. “I have no plans right now... I just wanted out of there.”
“I understand.”
I forced a smile. He raised his hand, holding a bag of Chinese takeout. “Have you eaten? Or have you just been sleeping since you came back here?”
“I’m not just sleeping, okay? I’m packing,” I replied.
“So when was the last time you ate?” he asked, smiling in amusement.
I should probably be annoyed. He had no obligation or right to ask me like this. But instead of getting annoyed, guilt tightened my lips.
“Fae...”
I raised an eyebrow. “So you came to feed me here, too? You’ll take care of me even here?”
He sighed, and I saw the confusion in his eyes. The worry. And I remembered how he looked when he tried to chase and stop me from leaving, even when the boat I was on was already at sea.
We locked eyes.
He took a step closer. My chin was already raised when he lowered his head, and our lips met before he kicked the condo door closed behind him. I didn’t know where he put the paper bag of takeout. I didn’t care. I cared more about how quickly he lost his clothes and mine. He also didn’t need direction to my bedroom and my bed. The important thing was I was with him on top of it.
“Jesus... Fae...” he groaned in a hoarse voice as his feverish eyes focused on me while we were on top of a pile of pillows and blankets, and my thighs were spread open to welcome him. “I’ve missed this. Don’t leave me like that again.”
I swallowed. “I don’t want to get too attached to you,” I said to him as I panted.
“But what about me? I looked for you,” he said while his hand caressed my cheek and hair. “I wasn’t ready for you to leave...”