Chapter 59 Chapter 59: Open Marriage? Part 1
Cathy's P.O.V
I stared at Xavier, my mouth hanging open in shock. The words he had just spoken seemed to echo in the kitchen, bouncing off the marble countertops and stainless steel appliances. An open marriage.
"What do you mean?" I asked, my voice barely above a whisper.
Xavier's expression softened immediately, and he reached for my hand. His touch made my skin crawl, but I forced myself not to pull away. I needed to hear this, needed to understand exactly what he was proposing.
"This way, you can get even with me," Xavier explained, his voice smooth and reasonable. "You can go out, have your own experiences, and then we can leave this incident behind us for good. We can move forward with a clean slate."
I felt like I was watching this conversation happen from outside my own body. Was he really suggesting what I thought he was suggesting?
"Get even with you," I repeated slowly, testing the words. "By sleeping with other people."
Xavier nodded, squeezing my hand gently. "If that's what you need to do to feel better about what happened, then yes. I'm giving you permission."
Permission. Like I was a child who needed his approval to make my own choices.
I could see right through him. This wasn't about making me feel better or helping me move past his betrayal. This was about Xavier finding a convenient excuse to sleep with Caroline openly. And probably see other women on the side as well, without having to hide it or feel guilty about it.
He wanted to have his cake and eat it too. Keep me as his respectable wife for appearances, for his company's image, while he did whatever he wanted with whoever he wanted. He was doing it anyways, without even having to ask me…but this open marriage, it was like a free pass for him to do whatever he pleased.
I should have been devastated. I should have been beyond hurt, crushed by the realization that my husband cared so little about our marriage that he was willing to turn it into an arrangement where we were basically strangers living under the same roof.
But I felt nothing. Or rather, I felt something, but it wasn't pain. It wasn't heartbreak.
It was relief.
Something inside me had broken yesterday when Hunter had showed me those pictures of Xavier's infidelity. When I had seen the proof of his betrayal laid out in front of me in high definition color. That part of me that had loved Xavier, that had trusted him, that had believed in our marriage, had shattered into pieces so small I would never be able to put them back together.
And now, standing here listening to him propose this ridiculous arrangement, I felt almost grateful. Because he was making this so much easier for me. He was showing me exactly who he really was, removing any doubt, any lingering hope that maybe our marriage could be saved.
But I couldn't let him see that. I couldn't let him know that his plan was actually giving me exactly what I needed.
I schooled my features into an expression of confusion and hurt. "So this means you'll be with other women?"
Xavier's grip on my hand tightened, and he pulled me closer. His eyes locked onto mine with an intensity that probably would have made my heart flutter a few days ago. Now it just made me want to pull away.
"I don't have anyone, Cathy," he said, his voice earnest. "I only want you. This isn't about me wanting to be with other people."
The lie was so smooth, so practiced, that I almost admired his skill at deception. Almost.
"But if you're feeling insecure about that night," Xavier continued, "if you need to work through those feelings, then I'm giving you permission to go out and find someone to vent with. Get it out of your system. And then we can close the marriage again and move forward for good."
Find someone to vent with. Like my pain was just some temporary inconvenience that could be fixed by sleeping with a stranger.
I pulled my hand away from his, wrapping my arms around myself. "I need to think about this. I can't rush into anything."
Xavier nodded, his expression understanding. Too understanding. Like he had expected this response and had already planned for it.
"Of course," he said gently. "Take all the time you need. This is a big decision, and I want you to be comfortable with it."
Comfortable. What a joke.
"I'm going to go rest," I said, already moving toward the kitchen door. "I haven't slept properly in days."
"Do you want me to come with you?" Xavier asked, taking a step forward.
"No," I said quickly, maybe too quickly. "I just need some time alone to think."
Xavier stopped, and I could see the calculation in his eyes. But then he nodded. "Alright. I'll be here if you need anything."
I didn't respond. I just turned and walked out of the kitchen, my footsteps echoing through the empty hallways of the mansion.