Chapter 42 Chapter 42: Punch to the Gut
Catharine's P.O.V
My mind raced back to the way Mr. Hawthorn had offered me that drink. The way he had insisted I take it, the way he had pushed it toward me with such determination. He hadn't just been harassing me randomly. He had planned this. He had already decided to spike that drink, and had already planned on taking advantage of me once the drug took effect.
The realization made me feel sick to my stomach. If I had accepted that drink, if I had taken even one sip, I would be the one in Caroline's position right now. Helpless, drugged, vulnerable.
I pulled the car over to the side of the snowy road, my hands trembling as I put it in park. The engine idled quietly and I turned in my seat to face Xavier.
"What do we do?" I asked, trying to keep my voice steady even though panic was clawing at my throat. "Xavier, what should we do?"
I had already turned the air conditioning on full blast, hoping the cold air would help bring Caroline's temperature down, and would help clear her system. But it didn't seem to be working. Caroline was writhing uncontrollably in the backseat, her body twisting and turning as she reached for Xavier with desperate hands.
"Xavier, please," Caroline moaned, her fingers clutching at his shirt, trying to pull him closer. "I need you. Please help me. Everything hurts. I'm burning up."
The sight made me deeply uncomfortable. I could see the way Caroline's dress had ridden up her thighs, the way her body was pressing against Xavier's, the glazed look in her eyes that showed she wasn't fully in control of herself.
"We should leave her in the car for a moment," I said quickly, desperately. "We can both step outside and call an ambulance. They'll know what to do. They'll have the right medication to counteract whatever drug she was given."
But Xavier shook his head violently, his arms wrapped around Caroline as she tried to climb onto his lap.
"No," he said sharply. "I can't leave Caroline alone like this. She's in pain, Cathy. Can't you see that? And the ambulance will take forever to get here in this weather and traffic."
Dread filled my stomach like ice water. There was something in Xavier's tone, something in the way he was looking at Caroline, that told me exactly where his mind was going.
"What do you mean?" I asked, even though part of me already knew the answer. "Xavier, what are you planning to do?"
Xavier didn't answer right away. He was too busy trying to keep Caroline from tearing at his clothes, from pressing her body against his. She was moaning continuously now, her face flushed bright red, sweat dripping down her temples.
"Xavier, please," Caroline whimpered. "I need you. Make it stop. Please make it stop."
And then Xavier turned to look at me. His eyes were cold, colder than I had ever seen them. There was no warmth there, no love, no recognition of our six years together. He looked at me like I was a stranger, an obstacle in his way.
"Get out of the car," he said flatly. "Wait outside for us."
I froze, unable to believe what I was hearing. My mouth fell open and I stared at him in complete shock.
"Are you serious?" I whispered. "Xavier, please tell me you're not serious right now."
"I'm completely serious," Xavier said, his voice hard and uncompromising. "Get out of the car and wait outside. We'll call you when we're done."
"When you're done?" I repeated, my voice rising. "Are you about to do something incredibly stupid? Because it sounds like you're about to do something incredibly stupid."
Xavier's jaw clenched and I saw anger flash across his face. "This isn't stupid, Cathy. I'm trying to help the woman carrying my child. She's in pain and I'm the only one who can help her right now."
Those words hurt more than anything else he had said tonight. The woman carrying my child. Not our child. Not the surrogate. Just his child. His and Caroline's.
"Are you willing to throw away our relationship for this?" I asked, tears starting to stream down my face. "Xavier, we've been together for six years. Six years. And you're going to throw all of that away to sleep with her in the backseat of our car?"
Xavier's expression didn't change. He looked at me like I was being irrational, like I was the one causing problems.
"Don't overreact," he said dismissively. "This is only business, Cathy. All physical and nothing emotional. It doesn't mean anything. There's nothing for you to worry about."
I felt like I had been slapped. Business? He was calling this business?
"My husband is about to have sex with another woman in our car," I said, my voice shaking with rage and hurt and disbelief. "How can I not overreact to that? This is insane, Xavier. This is completely insane."
"You're my wife," Xavier corrected coldly. "And you need to understand that sometimes sacrifices have to be made."
The casual way he dismissed our relationship, the way he reduced me to just a woman, like our six years together meant nothing, felt like another knife in my already bleeding heart.
"Why doesn't someone else help her then?" I demanded desperately, grasping for any alternative to what was about to happen. "Call a service. Call someone. Anyone. There has to be another option."
Xavier's face twisted with disgust at my suggestion. "No hooker is going to pollute Caroline's womb with their filth," he spat out. "Especially not now that she's carrying the Dalton heir. I won't allow some random stranger to touch her, to potentially harm my child."
The Dalton heir. He had actually called the baby the Dalton heir. Like Caroline was some kind of royal consort producing the next in line to a throne.
"So you'll do it yourself instead," I said numbly, feeling the last pieces of my heart shatter into dust.
"Yes," Xavier said simply. "I will. Because I'm the father and it's my responsibility to protect both Caroline and my child."
Caroline moaned again and pressed herself against Xavier's chest. Her hands were pulling at his shirt buttons now, trying to undress him. Xavier caught her hands but I could see the resolve in his face, I could see that he had already made his decision.
"If you don't want to leave," Xavier said, turning back to look at me one final time, "then you're welcome to watch the show. Stay here in the front seat and see exactly what needs to be done to help Caroline. Maybe you'll learn something useful."
The cruelty in his words, the absolute callousness of that statement, took my breath away. He was actually giving me permission to watch him have sex with another woman. He was treating this like it was nothing, like my feelings didn't matter at all.
"Xavier, please," I whispered one last time. "Please don't do this."
But Xavier didn't answer. He didn't give me time to speak anymore, didn't give me a chance to beg or plead or try to change his mind.
Instead, he pulled Caroline onto his lap fully and crashed his lips against hers in a desperate, hungry kiss. Caroline responded immediately, her arms wrapping around his neck, her body pressing against his as she kissed him back with drug-fueled passion.
I sat there in the driver's seat, frozen in horror, watching the man I loved kiss another woman. Watching him choose her over me without a moment's hesitation. Watching my entire world crumble to pieces right before my eyes.
Xavier's hands were in Caroline's hair now, pulling her closer. Caroline was moaning into his mouth, her hips moving against his in a way that made me want to throw up. They were completely lost in each other, completely forgetting that I was even there.
I couldn't watch this. I couldn't sit here and witness this betrayal, couldn't let Xavier destroy the last shred of dignity I had left.
With shaking hands, I grabbed the door handle and pushed it open. The cold night air hit me like a physical blow but I welcomed it. I stumbled out of the car and into the snow, my heels sinking into the white powder.
Behind me, I could hear the sounds from inside the car. Caroline's moans, Xavier's heavy breathing, the rustle of clothing being removed. Each sound was like a dagger to my heart.
I walked away from the car, my arms wrapped around myself, tears streaming down my face and freezing on my cheeks in the cold air. I didn't know where I was going. I just knew I had to get away.