Chapter 3

Noah:

The emptiness of the house echoed in me. I felt it as if that emptiness screamed in my ear every second I sat on the couch trying to read. The words on the page didn’t matter. I just wanted my siblings back in the house.

My phone beeped with a text from Pippa, finally responding to me. In not very kind words, she told me to chill out, and sent a picture of the kids playing at the park. They all got invited to a birthday party, and I couldn’t very well make them stay home. Just because I hated social interactions, didn’t mean I would keep them from having friends. And they also didn’t accept my bribe of taking them to the pool instead.

I did my best to actually chill out, getting back to my book. I might have found it more entertaining if I had half a dozen kids running around me, screaming about this, that, and the other thing. Or if a toddler or two had fallen asleep on the couch with me. This might as well have been torture.

A rapid knock on the door had a growl building in my chest, one made out of pure instinct. A person invaded my territory. I could smell them, telling me exactly who I would find. I didn’t want to deal with him, so I ignored the sound.

“Noah!” Adam called through the door. “I know you’re in there. You need to come out or I’m breaking this door down.”

“You wouldn’t,” I responded.

I heard wood cracking. Cursing, I stood up and went to save my door from the insane man who unfortunately knew exactly how to get me. At least when I opened the door, he didn’t look smug.

“I need you to come with me,” Adam said, hands shoved deep into his pockets, eyes tired as they stared at me.

He should have known better. I’d known Adam my whole life, growing up in the pack. I knew everyone within the pack on a first name basis, even when I had been so against talking to people. But Adam had been friends with my father when they were young, and until the day he died. They’d even Mended at the age of three—absurdly young and terribly lucky. Most of us didn’t meet our other parts until we were older. Some of us might not have been meant for that, but that wasn’t something I would say in front of Pippa. She always got pissy when I insinuated I should be alone, even when it came to something as basic and gods given as a Mending. Everyone got at least one person that made up the missing parts of their soul. If anyone ended up being a freak of nature and not have one, it would be me.

“What do you want?” I asked, not bothering to hide the irritation in my voice.

“It’s not just me. It’s the whole council,” Adam responded. “We’re having a meeting and you need to be there.”

“What? Why me?”

“You know exactly why. Get your shoes on. You have three minutes.”

That growl came back, despite the fact that I actually almost liked this guy. “Are you giving me an order?”

He growled back at me, taking a step forward. It might have made others back down, but I wouldn’t yield on my own territory. He knew that. When it finally occurred to him, he stopped to sigh.

“What do you want?” I repeated.

Adam stared at me a moment too long. I saw something off in his dark eyes. He knew something I didn’t know, and I saw the burden of that on his shoulders. I saw that, as well as something more bitter. Hope he didn’t really believe in.

His age showed then, but he looked a decade older. Adam started going gray after my father died. Losing the people you’d Mended with effected everyone differently. Some died there on the spot, some didn’t change at all, and some just looked… sad. What had once been black hair was now spotted with gray, like his beard. He stood an inch taller than me at six foot two, but I couldn’t feel that height anymore. His shoulders slumped, his power faded. With his other half gone, that was what Adam had become. Half.

“Something’s wrong,” Adam told me. “Very, very wrong.”

“And what the hell do you think I can do about it?”

He stared again, body tensing. “Everything, Noah. Please, come with me.”

I followed and I didn’t know why. Something about his desperate tone had been enough to get me, I supposed. I walked behind Adam as we quickly made our way to the building in the square. No one was outside, which I found suspect.

Our common building kind of reminded me of a courthouse. When you walked inside, you walked into this massive room with a bunch of directions to go in. Most of them led to classes of some sort, but our council also resided in there. They’d take care of things for the community, like ordering food and supplies and other boring things I didn’t need to worry about.

The focus was also like a courtroom. A long table waited at the other end of the room, with five members already sitting down. Kara—Adam’s mate, Sidney, Catharine, and her mate Leon. It looked like they had all been waiting for me.

Adam walked past me, bowing at the rest of the council before he went to take his seat in the center.

“You could do to bow as well,” Leon said, sounding bored.

I smiled at him. “I don’t bow to anyone.”

“We all show our respect, boy.”

“Earn mine.”

“Stop,” Catharine said, holding a hand up. “We aren’t here to bicker. There’s a greater problem at hand and I for one would like to solve it before our whole pack dies out. Don’t you agree?”

“What the hell are you talking about?” I asked, feeling my forehead crinkle. The council could be dramatic, so I didn’t panic like they all seemed to be ready to do.

The six of them looked at each other, as if communicating something silently. That seemed like a stupid waste of time, since they called me here in the first place.

“Excuse me,” I said. “But I was nice enough to show up. The least you can do is tell me what you want.”

“Why is he even here?” Leon gestured to me, rolling his eyes. “Noah made his choices after his father died. Once a lazy, selfish child, always a lazy, selfish child. You all know what we need to do.”

“I don’t want to hear it,” Adam snarled. “If you think it would be that easy to steal something that isn’t yours, then you’d certainly pay the price when you’re proven wrong.”

“You can’t just fill shoes that aren’t meant to be yours,” Kara agreed. “We have a true alpha, and it’s not you.”

“I didn’t say it had to be me,” Adam hissed through his teeth.

“What was that?” I stepped in, my ears pricking up. “What did you say about an alpha?”

Adam looked to me, his eyes gentler than anyone else’s. He cleared his throat, silencing the people beside him. “You knew this already. It was never in question that you’re our alpha. This pack is named after your family, as it has been for centuries. It was your family’s blood that started this line, and you are the only one who can be our alpha. Not your sister, not anyone else. You. You are the oldest born to William Kell, and you are our alpha.”

Leon scoffed. “An alpha who decided to sit down when it came time to step up. Any real alpha would have risen when his father died. Instead, he hid and let us take care of things. Look at the cost. Our magic is depleting faster and faster every full moon. Our moon sacrifices aren’t enough when the power we need isn’t coming from our alpha.”

“Which is what we’re here to discuss,” Sidney said calmly. She smiled kindly at the moron, because that was what she did best. She could calm down most chest puffing wolves with her soothing and reasonable tone. As the youngest of the council members at only twenty-five, it was impressive. Most of us didn’t get control until a decade older. And the fact that she had only five years on me didn’t make me look all that good. If she could rise to the occasion at the time she did, then I should have been able to as well.

“We all know I’m no alpha,” I said. “That was my father, and his mother before him. Pippa would serve better.”

“We know that, honey,” Kara said, almost kindly. “But the problem is that as second born, she wouldn’t hold the same weight as you for our moon sacrifice. We need you as the leader, because you have more of a connection to the moon than any of us. Did you even pay attention in school?”

I hadn’t, really, but I knew how we functioned. When the full moon rose, we all had to make a sacrifice of magic for it. It was a show of respect for where our magic came from. We would give, and the moon would give back. We’d give it a night as wolves, and then we’d have the power to shift when we pleased.

When things went well, magic would flow freely. We’d get hurt, and heal almost instantly. We’d feel stronger, our populations would grow, and all the other goodies that came with being on top. But we hadn’t had a real alpha in almost three years. Worst still, we hadn’t had a mated one in eight.

“What are you asking of me?” I said in a breath, not addressing Kara’s words.

“You know what we’re asking,” Adam said. “We need an alpha, and you’re it. Either you step up, or we won’t last.”

“Or,” Leon cut him off. “Or, you leave.”

“What?” I sputtered.

“If you aren’t going to be the leader we need, then you shouldn’t get to be part of this pack. We’re suffering because you didn’t do what was necessary when the time came. Why should you get to live in the biggest house? Why should you get to sit on your ass all day while the rest of us strive to make this community work? If you don’t deliver us what we need, then you and your family have to go. You can even take those strays you’ve collected.”

I growled, stepping up to the table. I laid my hands on it, ready to fight if I needed to. I could lash out, slashing his throat open. My claws wouldn’t come out as fast as they could have if we had been at full power, but they were still faster than Leon’s.

“Are you threatening my family?” I asked slowly. “Are you telling your alpha that his children can’t stay in their own pack?”

“It’s not their pack,” Leon snarled back at me. “They’re children with parents too stupid to stay alive. You cannot decide who you get to take care of and who you don’t in this pack. You don’t have the luxury. It’s all of us or none of us, so fucking decide.”

My wolf wanted him dead for suggesting my family would be banished. My family had started this community to begin with. Those strays he spoke us? The pack had started with strays like them. They had been omegas that no one else wanted. But my family did.

“Let’s take a breath,” Kara said, holding her hands out. “Noah, it sounds like you’re willing to take on your role as alpha. Is that true?”

Our pack was dying, so I didn’t have much of a choice to begin with. “Of course.”

“Wait,” Leon said. “Would we not be better without him, actually? He’s not even a full wolf.”

“I’m a hell of a lot more wolf than you are,” I challenged.

“Would your mother agree if she were here?”

It was a low blow and everyone in the room knew it. It was… it was a thing, when my father mated with my mother. Nine out of ten wolves mated with another wolf. Mostly because we didn’t stray from the pack, but also because we understood each other in a way no other creature ever could. But my father went and found himself an Alium. A person with magic that focused to one or two special abilities. It was rare to get more than one. My mother could only grow plants.

The pack had accepted her when their alpha picked her out. And a mate with magic had been better than one without when it came to the moon sacrifices we needed to make. Then the first hit came when she… And the second hit came when Dad died. I had been the third hit and that final, crushing blow.

“I’m wolf enough,” I stated. “And I’ll be your alpha. I’ll come for these damn meetings, I’ll solve problems. I don’t care. I’ll do it.”

“It’s more than that,” Sidney said, shaking her head. “You know that. A drop of water isn’t going to save a man in the desert. We need a flood, Noah.”

“A flood?”

Adam stared at me gravely. “You need a mate, Noah. You know you do. We won’t have enough magic without that bond to boost the both of you up.”

My heart might have stopped beating. I’d never had any intentions of looking for a mate. I was too busy with the kids to even think about it, and I couldn’t imagine the utter torture of having to wake up to the same face every single day of your life. I would have preferred no faces.

“I can’t do that,” I said. “I just can’t.” A mate would’ve been more than a partner. Anyone could go and find themselves a spouse. A mate required love. A love so strong that the magic inside of me would connect to them, even if they didn’t have any. It would wrap around us both, my blood becoming their blood. My heart, their heart. My mind, their mind. I would no longer belong to myself.

“You don’t have a choice,” Leon said. “In less than thirty days, the blue eclipse is coming. It’ll require more magic than we’ve had since your father was alive. If we don’t give the moon what it needs, then we’ll be left vulnerable. We’ll be weak enough that anything sniffing around would feel it, and they could take us down.”

“A mate,” I repeated. “In less than thirty days. You’re insane.”

“We’re desperate,” he corrected. “If you can’t do this, then we do have one more option to save this pack. You won’t like it.”

“Leon,” Catharine warned. “No.”

He ignored her. “If we did this, then your family would obviously be allowed to stay. They would be protected for their whole lives, as their Mendings would be, and their families.”

“Stop talking,” Adam ordered.

“We will not disrespect the Kell name this way,” Kara said, standing from her chair. “You wouldn’t be doing this if you were speaking to his father.”

“But I’m not speaking to his father,” Leon said. “His father is gone. If Noah is truly an alpha, then he would know that sometimes they have to make sacrifices. If this is in his blood, then he should be willing.”

“Willing to do what?” I asked.

“You really didn’t pay attention in class, did you? There’s a way to pass on your position to someone else. Someone who proves that they’re worthy of carrying it.”

My claws pushed at the tips of my fingers and I could barely keep them in. I knew how to pass my alpha status on. Either I had a child and died, or another wolf would have to challenge me and win. Either way, I had to die.

“And who would take my place?” My voice was even and steady, but still harsh. “Would you like to challenge me, Leon? Are you that confident you would win?”

He leaned closer, making the wolf in me beg to come out. I could have him dead in seconds. Or worse, I could have reached out and touched his skin. That would have been enough.

“This is about more than your life,” Leon told me. “We have dozens upon dozens of people in danger because you didn’t come through for us. The lives of every wolf in this pack are on your shoulders. I have a mate. If I were alpha, we would provide enough magic to save us. It wouldn’t be nearly as powerful as yours, and everyone here knows that. But I would rather live by the skin of my teeth than not at all. So either die for us, or do what you should have done three years ago.”

The room fell silent as they all waited for my answer. I couldn’t force a mate. Lying down and dying wasn’t an option either. I had children to take care of. I couldn’t just leave them in the hands of these people and hope it would be enough.

“Fine,” I said through my teeth. “I’ll find a mate.”

Adam exhaled, eyes closing for a long moment. “Then I suggest you hurry.”