Chapter 41 - Fairytale

Natasha's POV

"All I know is that you're my mate and I will die if I lose you."

I deeply closed my eyes as I let Valerian's words register in my mind.

"Natasha," he called.

He continued to softly caress my cheeks.

It calmed me down and gave me comfort.

"Natasha."

My name stumbled from his lips yet again.

Valerian's touch traveled from my cheeks down to my chin and then my lips.

He caressed my lower lip.

I finally opened my eyes.

He's deeply staring down at me.

"No," I muttered.

Confusion came across Valerian's face but I felt him slowly removed his hand from my face.

I was taken aback by how obedient he was.

How he removed his hand quickly from my face the moment I uttered the word "no"

And, this is exactly why I said no. Valerian actions confuses me and for some reason, it manages to disappoint me.

Like how he was suddenly started to act sweet and being so careful with me and then the next hours, he's back to being arrogant, and heartless devil that he is.

It's starting to become a cycle and I don't want it to be a cycle.

I don't want to spend my time trying to decipher what version of Valerian I will get.

He's confusing me and this should stop. Right here, right now.

"I know we're mates. . ." I started. "And we have a deal, but I don't want to play charades with you or whatever this is that you're playing. Can you just stick to our deal and act normally?"

Valerian creased his forehead. "What do you mean, Natasha?"

"This. The way you treat me and it's changes— it's tiring," I spoke out. "Right now, you're treating me nice but I have no idea what kind of treatment I will get later or tomorrow."

Valerian fell silent but his eyes speaks a thousand of words that I can't seem to understand.

I bit the insides of y cheeks as I let the silence between me and Valerian enveloped us.

I have a lot of things to say but seems like I forgot what they were and all I could do was feel the heaviness in my heart.

It's so heavy. . .

"Natasha. . ."

I heard Valerian whispered under his breath. I almost didn't hear him if he wasn't so close to me. He was literally standing right in front of me and I could almost hear his breathing and see the way his chest go slowly up and down as he breathe.

I wanted to say something so bad, but I stopped myself. Not only because I couldn't formulate words but because even if I have so many things to say to him and I want him to hear me out, I think those things I have said earlier are enough already and he should understand what I meant.

Valerian lift his right hand and it landed on chin. He held my chin up and made me look straight at him.

"Natasha," he muttered my name once again.

I didn't respond because the way he say my name doesn't seem like he was calling me, it's more like he wants to just say my name.

It's like a chant that Valerian loves to perform.

Valerian's finger suddenly moved up from my chin up to my lips.

He softly caressed my lower lip that sent a thousand of volts of electricity into my entire body.

It made me shiver.

His presence whenever he's close to me calms me down. His mere touch could send my whole body and emotions into another dimensions.

Is it because we are mates?

Is that the reason why I feel like this?

"Wha—-"

I wasn't able to finish what I wanted to say when Valerian suddenly leaned down on me and moved his face closer to mine.

I could smell him already. His smell is so clear to me. It's like he was on my nostrils, and it's enough to take my breath away.

Valerian could calm me down and stabilize my breathing but right now it seems like the opposite.

I couldn't seem to breathe as I feel like there's hundreds of butterflies flying uncontrollably inside my stomach and there's monkeys playing in my chest, hammering.

I took a deep breath and closed my eyes but I guess that was a wrong move because Valerian read it wrong and now I just felt his lips touched mine.

Slowly.

Gently.

He kissed me so gently, like with so much care.

And I couldn't do anything but return his kisses. I let my body betray me, I let what I feel betray my pride.

I just wanted to breathe. That's all I wanted, but now tasting his lips, I didn't know that I wanted nothing but his kiss.

Valerian deepened our kiss and I had to anchor my arms around his neck.

His slow, gentle kiss suddenly turned into a kiss of longing. I can feel his so much passion and desire by the way he move his lips and I can't help but return the fervor.

Because this is what I want.

I want this. . . too.

After a couple of minutes, I had to break off our kiss to catch my breath.

I was breathless.

But that wasn't enough.

I felt my body wanting for more.

More of his kisses.

More of Valerian Fenrir.

"Hey. . ." Valerian muttered as he stared down at me intently.

He watched as I struggled to catch my breath.

And, I watch as a small smile formed on his lip.

"Intense?" he asked, teasingly.

I observed his expression to see if he was mocking me but there was no sign. He was not in any way mocking me.

I felt like a feather suddenly brushed my heart. I felt so light.

I smiled, that turned into a chuckle, that suddenly died down when I remembered something.

"What does that mean?" I questioned.

"Didn't you like it?" he asked back.

I heaved a sigh. "It's not what I wanted."

Valerian fell silent.

He stood up straight.

I thought he was going to turn his back on me and leave, but he pulled a chair and placed it right in front of me.

He sat down and leveled my sight.

I had to pretend to fix my hair so I could avoid his burning stares.

But Valerian is such a devil because he waited for me to finish pretending to fix my hair.

"Natasha," he called me.

Valerian surely like saying my name.

"I apologize if I confused you with my actions, especially with my treatment. . ." he spoke. "It's not what I wanted."

I bit the insides of my cheeks to stop the smile that was starting to form on my lips.

"No one should be confused with how others treat them," he continued. "I'm sorry."

I wanted to thank Valerian for acknowledging what I feel and for taking accountability for his actions but I just nodded instead.

"I apologize for ever causing you any pain; it's not my intention," he added.

I nodded.

"I will be clear with my intention from now on."

I nodded again.

"I will be consistent with my treatment."

I nodded once again.

"This will never happen agai--"

Before Valerian could even finish what he was going to say, I didn't waste any more time and quickly closed the gap between us, planting a kiss on his lips.

It was immediate.

The kiss only lasted a second.

But the moment I leaned back on my seat, I saw how surprised Valerian is with what I did.

He was astonished with the 1 second kiss I just did. Mainly because I was the one who initiated it.

I could say that I was surprised myself when I kissed him but I can't deny that I did that wholeheartedly.

Like I said, it's what I want too.

The corner of  Valerian's lips rose and formed into a smile before he swiftly grabbed my chair and pulled me close to him with ease.

"You're driving me insane," he whispered before closing the gap between us and claiming my lips with his once again.