I MUST ADMIT IT

The Consolation Of The Helpless


Ethan watched her for a long second before resigning himself. He had tried to convince Elena, almost to beg her to come back with him, to leave that miserable place where Ainara pretended to be a broken victim in order to wrap her in yet another of her lies. But nothing worked. His mother clung to her daughter’s hand as one clings to a dying being, insisting that she had to stay, that it was her duty as a mother to accompany her through such a painful moment.

Elena looked him in the eyes before saying goodbye.

“Son… when I have the strength, I want to talk to Amber as well. There are things left unresolved,” she said in a thread of a voice, trying to remain firm in front of her children, though he sensed a strange weariness in her pupils.

Ethan nodded, swallowing the words that wanted to spill out. He did not have the strength to argue with her without breaking.

“Call me whenever you want to see me. I… I’ll be here,” he murmured, forcing a weak smile.

Ainara, behind him, leaning against the doorframe, held his gaze. She did not need to say anything. Malice shone in her eyes like a secret she enjoyed far too much.

Before turning to leave, Ethan threw her a silent warning, just with his eyes—This isn’t over.

She answered with a barely curved smile, an icy mockery that he felt pierce his stomach.

He left without looking back.

Night closed over the city with a kind of warm heaviness when Ethan returned to the mansion. He had not had time to put his thoughts in order. Everything inside him was at war: he felt guilt, rage, exhaustion, fear… and, above all, the love that held him from the deepest part of himself, almost like an anchor.

When he opened the door, he saw Amber at the dining table, setting plates, arranging cutlery, moving with a calm that contrasted with the chaos he carried within. When she saw him, the light in her eyes changed; she dropped what she was holding and ran to him, wrapping her arms around his neck and kissing him with an impulse that disarmed his soul.

“I missed you,” she whispered against his lips, caressing his face with both hands.

He closed his eyes for a moment and breathed in her scent. He brushed her cheek with his thumb, trying to smile, but the gesture came out fractured.

“How are you? How are your siblings?” he asked, sidestepping for a moment the gravity in his chest.

“Dorothy is almost ready to have the baby… she’s huge,” she replied in a sweet tone, though she immediately sensed that he was distant. “I think she’ll need help at home soon. I was thinking of hiring someone…”

Ethan shook his head gently.

“Your siblings can stay here. The mansion is enormous, Amber. We can adapt whatever they need.”

She lowered her gaze.

“They’re fine where they are. They already have their school nearby… and they’re used to it. I don’t want to move them again; besides, they asked me themselves not to relocate them.”

He took her by the hand and led her to the dining room. She felt the weight in the air even before he spoke.

“Ethan…” she whispered, nervous. “What’s wrong? You’re scaring me.”

He ran a hand through his hair, as if he needed to hold on to something invisible. Finally, he sat down and settled her on his lap, resting his forehead against her neck.

“I need to tell you something,” he murmured.

Amber’s heart trembled.

“Tell me.”

Ethan took a breath.

“My mom… she’s worse than I thought. And with Ainara…” He closed his eyes in frustration. “She’s manipulating her. She convinced her that she lost a five-month pregnancy. It’s all a lie.”

Amber felt a cold void open in her chest.

“And Elena believed her?”

“Yes. And worse… she decided to stay with her. She asked me to leave. To leave her there.”

Amber took his face in both hands, forcing him to look at her.

“Ethan… your mom doesn’t know the truth. We can’t blame her for that.”

But he went on, as if he couldn’t stop the avalanche.

“And Venus…” His voice broke slightly. “It’s destroyed, Amber. Between Liam and Ainara they took everything. There’s almost nothing left. Martín thinks I should declare bankruptcy.”

Amber felt him tremble. Not physically—he was trembling with feeling.

“Ethan…”

“I’m going to resign,” he said at last. “I’m going to start from scratch. There’s no point in continuing when my mother won’t be there to see what’s left of the company. Venus was hers. Because besides, my mom doesn’t have much time left.”

Amber felt tears betray her. She covered her mouth, trying to hold back the sob, but the tears began to fall without permission.

“We missed it, Ethan…” she stammered. “We were so caught up in our own world, so… so lost in each other, that we didn’t see anything. How did we not realize that Elena was unwell? How…? I thought the treatment was being effective, damn it! How inconsiderate I’ve been, my God.”

He hugged her tightly, as if he wanted to keep her from breaking.

“It’s not your fault, sweetheart,” he murmured into her hair. “I’m the one who should have been paying attention. I’m the one who neglected her. You only… survived.”

She shook her head, clinging to him even more.

“I feel just as guilty as you do.”

Ethan held her by the hips and made her look at him.

“Amber… listen to me.” His voice carried a firmness that raised goosebumps on her skin. “The only place where I can breathe is this one. Here. With you. If it weren’t for you, everything else would be a damn hell.”

Amber swallowed her tears, unable to say anything. The way he looked at her was an embrace in itself.

She wiped her face with the back of her hand, trying to compose herself.

“Ethan… if you need help with Venus… I still have the money from the contract. I’ve spent a little on the kids, but… I still have more than ninety percent. You can use it.”

He shook his head with a weary sigh.

“That money is yours. Earned by you. I’m not going to touch it. Besides, Venus needs millions of dollars, sweetheart, millions. There’s not much we can do anymore.”

Amber moved closer, sitting fully on his lap. She wrapped her arms around Ethan’s neck and pressed her body against his, like someone trying to fit together two broken pieces.

“I couldn’t accept that money anymore,” she said softly. “I couldn’t charge for loving the only person I’ve ever loved like this in my life.”

The air left Ethan’s lungs in a long, surrendered sigh. He buried his head in her neck, breathing her in, sinking into her as if whatever little he had left intact was rekindled there.

“I love you, Amber,” he murmured against her skin, kissing her slowly. “You’re the only thing that keeps me from falling.”

She closed her eyes, feeling his lips trace her neck with a tenderness that hurt. She stroked his hair slowly, letting herself be held, letting herself be filled by that love that once frightened her and was now a definitive anchor.

“I’m here,” she whispered. “I’m not going to let you go.”

Ethan lifted his head and kissed her—not with urgency, but with a deep, calm love, the kind that rebuilds. He held her tighter against him, and the world seemed to stop for an instant. The chaos outside continued, the war with Ainara continued, the weight of Elena’s fading presence continued… but there, in that room lit only by the dim glow of the lamps, only they existed.

Their hearts trembled, but they were together.