49: Tears Of A Prince

“How have you been?” He cupped her face as he asked and walked further into the room. Fareeda smiled at him, wondering how she didn’t recognize his voice from the start. She knew it wasn't Nafisa because the voice didn’t sound like hers, being nearly blind had thought her how to recognize a person’s voice she heard it, but she wondered why when he turned his voice she didn’t.

She placed her hands on top of his and smile as they both sat on the edge of the bed. “I've missed you so much, I called Nana and she couldn’t believe that you’re a prince, I couldn’t believe her either. I told her not to tell any of them, though. You can call Alhaji if you feel like it, but just Nenne and Nana are enough for me.”

He chuckled and shook his head, “Why don’t you forget all that had happened when you’re countries apart from each other? Why don't you call them, I mean Hajia and Alhaji.” She immediately shook her head and Muhaseen’s chortle stopped her from replying. Mujaheed turned behind him and took the bed while he smiled, “My baby, I've missed you so much.” He nuzzled his nose on hers and smiled, “Hope you didn’t trouble your Maama that much?”

She loved it whenever he was interacting with Muhaseen, it was the best interaction she had got to see in her life. Everything looked so real and beautiful that some part of her wished she had had the chance to have this kind of childhood as well. Not that she was complaining, but even though there were times that Fareeda wished her life didn’t turn out this way, she was glad and thankful that it did. Because this same life she thought was horrible was what gave her Mujaheed and that was a gift she would live to treasure forever.

“She didn’t, she's a good girl, you know? Not as stubborn as her Maama used to be.” He chuckled and pinched her cheeks.

“Her Maama is still stubborn, I know that better than anyone.” She watched as he carefully lulled Muhaseen to sleep until she was breathing slowly before he kissed her forehead and went to place her down in her crib.

“I'm jealous, Muhaseen will be more of a daddy’s girl than a mummy’s girl.” She pouted her lips and he chuckled before he walked up to her.

“But I'll always be yours, isn’t that compensation enough?” He asked and she rolled her eyes at him. “Come on, at least smile before I go and take my bathe, then I can fill your curiosity as much as you want, or you’re no more curious.”

Her head immediately jerked up and she smiled widely at him, “Go on, I'll warm something for you to eat, I doubt if you’ve eaten anything.”

He was at the door when he immediately turned to her, “No, I've eaten with Daada, and you shouldn’t be seen in the kitchen.”

She stopped by the door, “Who’s that? And why shouldn’t I be seen? Everyone knows I'm here, don’t they?”

He shook his head at her, “Not everyone, it’s just the servants and they won’t talk about it. Daada is my father, the king. I'll take you to see him tomorrow.” She immediately walked back to the kitchen and to the where he stood by the bathroom room.

With her eyes filled with curiosity and excitement, she spoke. “So, you have a father?” She chuckled as she palmed her forehead. “Sorry, I mean your father is alive, but you’ve never mentioned about him. Okay, how is he? Not anything like Alhaji, right?” She asked, with a silent prayer that at least one of them should have the best father figure in his or her life.

He chuckled and shook his head at her, “He’s still alive, but very sick. Even though I don’t want to come to the conclusion about the kind of father Alhaji has been to you, he’s nothing like him.”

She giggled, “That’s why you’re so good with Muhaseen. I'm glad you got the father’s love everyone deserves, that way my kids won’t grow up like I did.”

He playfully pinched her cheeks and joked. “You’re still a kid with a grown up’s body. Let your soul grow, you’ll love what it will make you feel like.” Mujaheed immediately fell into the bathroom and closed the door behind him because he knew how much she hated it whenever he told her that her soul was young, she should let it grow and whatsoever.

She sat back on the bed and looked around the room, even though it was full of luxury, a touch of richness and fashion, there was something about the whole building that screamed of old times. The ambience, the air that surrounded it depicted royalty and power and the kind of love these family shared. Her eyes caught a frame on the other side of the room, and she smiled before she walked up to the frame. It was a picture of Mujaheed, an older woman and also a younger lady. He wasn’t the same age he was now; he wasn’t young also.

“That was me, Yumma and Kulthum. Daada wasn’t home when we took the picture and he kept complaining that we had ditched him, to annoy him more, Yumma framed it and hang it in her room. And even after she died, no one dared take it off, not even me nor the innocent Kulthum.” She heard his voice behind her and even before she turned, his fragrance had made it known to her that he was around.

She turned to him with a calming look on her face and a smile, “Who’s Kulthum? Your sister? Where is she now?” Even though it was evident enough that she was, Fareeda didn't want to make further assumptions about him. She wanted all she would like him to know to be the truth about him.

He smiled and nodded his head at her, “Yes, she's my younger sister. She’s the same age as you, now 24 years old. So, you can understand why when you used to be stubborn why I wanted to smack you until you die, because my younger sibling is your age.”

She chuckled, looked up at the picture again before she sadly smiled. They looked like a happy family, and their mother was so beautiful, from the edges of her head one could tell she had a very long hair. The same one the Fulani people of Cameroon had. “Where is she now, Kulthum I mean.”

He smiled and slumped on the bed; his eyes fixed on the frame. “She got married after Yumma died because she couldn’t stay here all alone, I couldn’t be together with her because I'm a man. I encouraged her to get married to the man she loved, he’s the second prince of Agadez, but they live in Oman.”

“Where is Agadez?” She eased when he pulled her to him on the bed and they lay down staring at the white ceiling that had the inscription of royalty.

“Niger, don’t you know that? Where’s the important of your geography?” He teased and she rolled her eyes even though they were both facing the ceiling for him to notice but she knew he would know that she had rolled her eyes.

“Whatever. So, she now lives in Oman? When was the time she got married?” She asked, suddenly interested in Kulthum because seeing the way she smiled was so filled with innocence.

“She has been married five years ago, I left just two weeks after her wedding, she was 19 when she got married. She doesn’t know, but I check up on her sometimes, she’s doing fine with her husband and their kid now, I think the last time I checked she was even pregnant, that was last year, she must’ve given birth now.”

She turned to look at him and he had a satisfied look on his face even though a very sad one. “Tell me, how are you feeling about all this? I can see you’re so sad, maybe you even want to cry. Why did you leave home? When you have such a respectful title and go to Nigeria where no one knows you, stayed there and disguised your identity as a gateman. Why, Mujaheed?”

“I had to do that to save myself, my sister and my father, because then, they were the only ones left.” She was about to speak when he placed his index finger on her lips and shook his head at her. “Just listen, will you? Please?” She nodded her head at him, wishing she had the ability to wipe the unshed tears of his heart. “You see, we might be a royal family, but in our hearts, we know we’re just a normal family. Because most royal families don’t have a time for each other, they don’t share that bond and love normal families used to share. I think that’s why Yumma made it a responsibility upon herself to make sure we lived a normal life, even though we can live like everyone else does, but still, as a royal family it’s everything we could ever ask for.

“Daada used to have our time, Fareeda, so much that there are people in the royal council that think he's emotionally weak for a man and also a king, but none of those talks concern him because to him, we’re his life. Yumma was his childhood friend, they grew up together in this royal palace, she was the younger sister of Baffah, they were second cousins and they got married. I could say Daada loves so fiercely because even when he became the kind after their father had died, he made it upon himself to make sure everyone knows he loved his wife. The only Queen alive. Because at that time, every king was expected to have more than two wives, but he stood on his ground because he loved her alone.

“Fast forward to when she gave birth to me, it was said that nothing had ever been celebrated in this palace like it was when on my naming ceremony day. It felt as though they got an angel as a child, which to me I was. Fareeda, I grew up as a prince loved by everyone. I could say to you that I've never known any hardship, I hardly cry unless for mischief or if I want Yumma to do something or give me something, but she didn't.

“I was four years old when Kulthum was born, that was a year of celebration. We had an addition and it happened to be a girl, a perfect happy family of four. Love lived through us, so as bliss, happiness, and compassion. There were times we even forgot Daada was a king because he mostly did everything with us, he didn't care if he had palace matters to attend to, whenever it was us, he made sure he was present. When I was done with my secondary school, I went to Birmingham, UK, and did my first degree. Everyone disagreed because they wanted me to go to a French country to get my degree, but I wanted to be fluent in English like I was, in both French and Fulani. Daada and Yumma agreed, so no one’s opinion’s matter.

“The only problem was, Daada used to have a brother, Fareeda, his brother’s name is Sadam. No, he’s still alive but I regard to him as dead. He’s the second in command after Daada in this palace, that’s what the Hausa kingdoms call waziri, right? He had always hated Yumma, Daada and all of us because of the throne Daada was on. He felt that he was the one that deserved the throne because he was the older brother but still, their father succeeded the throne to Daada. He has a wife, Yapendo Adama, well, for what she showed us all, that’s before I know the kind of people they all are, she showed us love. We were all accepted in the palace, not just here, everywhere we go, so she thought it would be safe for her to show us acceptance and love.

“She has a daughter two years younger than Kulthum, but they were the best of friends. I loved them all, I took care of them and whenever I come back from the UK, they were mostly together with me whenever I'm not together with my friends, which were a few. Her name is Mairamou, and unfortunately, she fell in love with me. I didn’t know what that meant, because she had never told me outwardly, I mean, she was just 17 years old at the time, who would have thought she would fall in love with someone?

“I think her mother knows, but that’s left with them. The last eid we all celebrated with Yumma was the eid she died. It was on eid day, and like in Hausa culture back in Nigeria, royal families play with horses to add more light to the celebrations, that’s what happened. Like Yumma used to, she made sure I ate during those celebrations because I was never serious about myself or my health, never. Like the servants told me, she went to my chamber looking for me and when she didn’t see me there, she asked one of the servants to call me. Her maid of honor used to be Nafisa’s mother, you’ve seen Nafisa, right?” He stopped. He had been wanting to stop because this was the part it got all messy and painful that he wished he would never remember anything that happened on that day.

“Yes, I did.” She managed to answer, because she could already feel the pounding of her chest, afraid of what he had to say.

He huffed out some air, silently consoling himself not to cry, “Nafisa’s mother was her maid of honor and most trusted to her. They stayed together in my room as Yumma pulled out my school graduation album, like Nafisa’s mother said, she kept flipping through the pictures of the ladies there while smiling, saying that if I came back she’d have to ask me who amongst them was my girlfriend.

Suddenly, a maid came with a try of food and she acted weirdly when she saw them in the room. Yumma asked her what was there, and she told her that I was the one that sent someone to the palace kitchen and asked them to cook my favorite. She collected the tray and told her she can leave, she wanted us to eat together but I took so long to come back because I didn't want her to force me to eat something, knowing what the call was about. She became famished, Fareeda, and she ate that food, alone. And guess what? It was poisoned. Yumma died a few minutes after both me and Kulthum got to my room, her last words were to Daada for him to take care of us.” He was crying, painfully crying that his whole shoulders shook with his tears and Fareeda brought him to her chest and he rested his head on her bosom as they both cried.

All her life, she had had scenarios of what would’ve been Mujaheed’s past life, but she had never imagined this would be his life. But love and pain at their highest intensity. She wouldn't imagine what he must’ve felt. She felt it was better for her because she had someone to hate for her Mama’s death, but she doubted if he had any.

“My Yumma died in my stead, Fareeda. If I had known that food was poisoned, which was specially made for me, I wouldn’t have stayed longer without coming. I would’ve come so we eat together, and we’d share our last moments together and die together. I feel like I was responsible for her death, Fareeda. Why didn’t I come in time? Why didn’t I come and eat that food instead of her to eat because I was the one that wanted to be killed.” Fareeda fondled his hair, she knew how bad it was for someone to blame himself for something bad that had happened to his loved one. She was in this shoes, she knew how painful they felt and agonizing they were to the heart.

“It isn’t your fault, Mujaheed. And even though I've never seen Yumma, I know even if she would ask that one of you would die, she would choose you stay alive and she would die instead because a mother’s love is always that strong Mujaheed. She wouldn’t like it for you to live in such agony, blaming yourself for her death.” She knew nothing she would say to him would make him feel better at this moment all she could do to him was to let him cry to his heart’s satisfaction.

“I don't know, but somehow, that was the day I mentally died as well, Fareeda. Nothing pleased my eyes, I wanted nothing but to hold onto Kulthum and cry until my eyes ached. She was even stronger than I was, she was the one consoling me when it should’ve been me consoling her. We stayed in her chamber for fourteen days without moving, it’s only Daada that could make us eat something despite him being in great despair, he consoled us, fed us, and made us smile when we could. I day I caught him crying in her room was the day I knew I had to be strong for him, for Kulthum and also for myself. Losing a mother is the hardest pain one has to overcome in life, that’s why I don’t know what you must’ve felt and are still feeling seeing your mother die in the hands of your father, it must’ve been a terrible experience.” She wouldn’t want to remember any of that pain or the memories, they were something that if she had the power to, she would erase completely from her memories, but she knew she couldn’t. And right now, seeing the way Mujaheed was painfully crying, she knew that somehow, she was lucky to have had her father to hate, to resent as much as she wanted, but what of him? Because even when she asked him about the maid that brought the food, it was reported that she was died as well.