Chapter 18 The Lie Between Us
Mia's POV
The wind was cooler on the deck, brushing against my skin, but it did nothing to calm my chest. I stood by the railing, staring at the dark water in front of me.
I had been holding myself together all night. Smiling when I had to. Breathing when it felt hard. I never expected to see Liam tonight. The moment our eyes met, something inside me shattered. I needed air and space to calm my nerves.
I did not turn when I heard footsteps behind me. I already knew it was him. I felt his presence before he even spoke, and my stupid heart reacted before I could stop it. My pulse jumped the moment he stopped close to me. The familiar scent of him filled the air, and for a second, I wanted to tell him everything.
I could still see it clearly, the way Liam’s face fell when Josh introduced me as his girlfriend in front of his father. The hurt in his eyes had been impossible to miss. He had not known I had a boyfriend, not while he was clearly trying to get closer to me. And now, standing here with him behind me, the weight of that lie pressed heavily on my chest.
"I thought I might find you here," he said calmly.
My fingers tightened around the railing. "I just needed a minute."
He nodded. "I get it."
We stood there in silence, the sound of the waves filling the space between us. Then, carefully, like he was afraid of the answer, he asked, "How long have you and Josh been together?"
My throat went dry. I hated lying. I always had. But this was not about me.
"I have known him for almost two years," I said slowly. "We have been together for six months."
Liam's expression did not change. Not on the surface. But I caught the brief flicker in his eyes, and it was enough to make my chest ache.
"I did not realize it was serious," he said.
"It is," I replied, the word barely making it past my lips.
He nodded once and looked out at the sea, like he was trying to steady himself. I thought he might ask more, might push, but he did not.
Instead, he said, "I hope it is okay if I am still your friend."
I turned to him, surprised. "Of course it is."
He smiled, small and polite. "Good. Because I want to be. That is all I wanted to say."
My chest hurt. I wanted to tell him the truth. That Josh was not my boyfriend in the way he thought. That what I shared with Josh was built on loyalty, not love. That I was keeping a promise, not living a lie.
But I could not. Josh had been there when everyone else walked away. When my world fell apart, he stayed and helped me hold the pieces together. He was the only one who saw me break and did not turn his back.
He was family, and pretending to be his girlfriend was the only thing he had ever asked of me. I could not betray him. Not even for Liam. Even if the lie left me hollow. Even if Liam's quiet smile made my eyes sting.
So I nodded and forced a smile of my own. "I would like that."
We stood there a little longer, neither of us saying what we were really thinking. When Liam finally left, I did not follow. I stayed by the railing, my guilt eating me up.
I had lied and Liam believed me. But I had to protect Josh. It was the only thing I could do for the one person who had stayed by my side when I lost everything. Even if it meant turning my back on the one person who made me feel again.
Inside my cabin that night, the door clicked shut behind us, sealing out the sound of the waves and distant laughter. The soft light from the bedside lamp barely touched the tension in the room.
I sat on the edge of the bed, my heels kicked off near the door, mascara smudged beneath my eyes. I looked at Josh, not with anger, but with a question that had been bugging me all night.
"Why did you not tell me?" I asked, but Josh did not answer.
"That you knew Liam," I continued. "That you knew his family, and you were close."
His eyes flicked toward me, then away. "I told you I knew him."
"Yes," I said, my voice catching. "But you did not tell me what he meant to you. Or what they meant."
Josh leaned against the dresser, arms crossed, jaw tight. "Because I was not ready. And because I did not think you would come if you knew everything."
"You are right," I said softly. "I would not have."
He let out a breath, half sigh, half bitter laugh. "I figured."
After a long moment, he ran a hand through his hair. "Julian was not just someone I knew. He was my best friend." My heart stumbled at his words.
"And my first love," he added. I felt like I could not breathe.
"I never told him," Josh continued. "Not once. I wanted to, but I could not. Not with his life already planned out. Not when he had no idea how I felt."
His voice shook. "Julian was loud and fearless and stupidly kind. He made me feel alive. And then he died. And I never got to tell him." I stood slowly, the weight of his words too heavy to stay seated.
"I did not tell you because I did not want to relive it," he said. "And because Liam looks so much like him. Being around him feels like walking beside a memory I have not healed from."
He hesitated. "And that is not the only reason."
"What is it then?" I asked gently.
Josh looked at me fully. “Because I know their world. I didn’t want you to get involved with Liam and get hurt in the end. But when I saw the way Liam looked at you, like you were the only thing that mattered, I knew I could not stop it.”
"I miss Julian," he whispered, tears finally spilling. "Every day."
I crossed the room and wrapped my arms around him. "You were brave just to love him," I murmured.
When he pulled back, he wiped his eyes and laughed weakly. "I cannot even wear mascara in front his parents, let alone mine."
"You still look fabulous," I said softly as we sat together in silence after that.
Then Josh said quietly, "You like Liam." I froze, my spoon hovering over the ice cream tub between us.
"I do not know," I said finally. "Besides, I already have a boyfriend, remember."
"That is not what I asked," he said gently. "I asked if you like him."
I sighed. "I do not want to talk about this."
"Because if you do, you might say it out loud?" he asked.
I did not answer.
"I am sorry for asking you to stay away from him," Josh said. "That was selfish." I turned to him, surprised.
"I saw the way he looked at you," he continued. "Liam likes you a lot."
My chest tightened.
"And you," he added, smiling softly. "You are pretending not to care. But I see you."
"Josh," I whispered. "I love you."
"I know," he said. "But you love me like family."
"And he is not family," he teased, and my face turned hot.
"You are blushing," he laughed.
“No, I am not,” I lied, trying not to show my real feelings.
"Just admit that you like him, Mia.” He teased. And I had no answer because he was right, and that scared me.