Chapter 89

(**Annora**) 

After talking to Dr. Moreno, I was disappointed about what she had to say. The physical exam told her what I had already suspected. I am not pregnant.  

When my period was late, which it never is, I was overjoyed by the possibility of being pregnant. Then the logical part of my brain kicked in to tell me that it could just be stress. I have been under a lot of stress for the last few months. 

The stress that Quinn’s relationship with Dionne Masters has brought into my life. I cover it well but everything we have dealt with involving that crazy bitch has taken its toll on me. My life before hurricane Quinn re-entered it was so much calmer than it is now. I don’t want to go back to the dull and boring life I had but I need the hectic drama to stop.  

I need it to just stop. 

We need the peace and quiet to just be a couple. 

To just be a family. 

Dionne has been an ominous shadow lurking just outside my vision. Just when I think the shadow is disappearing, it lashes out with a toxic tendril of jealousy and hate. It has caused hate spread to me. To fester and grow until it causes me to hate her more than I have hated anyone in my life. 

Kidnapping my daughter made that hate grow until I had murderous thoughts and desires toward another human being for the first time in my life. 

I feel ashamed of that. 

Today while I sat in that interrogation room listening to Dionne drone on about nothing of significance, I had an epiphany. She got exactly what she wanted and I let her do it. She got under my skin in more ways than I knew.  

I figured it out as I left the room. That is why she wanted to see me instead of Quinn. She wanted to see my reaction when she told me that there would always be a place for her in his heart. That she meant something to him.  

He claims she didn’t but he wanted their relationship to mean more to him than it did.  

That I believe in more than anything. I felt the same way about Kyle. I wanted it to be more than it was. He ruined it but it never had a real chance to be anything more. My heart was never free. 

As for the jab she made about there being a crack already in our relationship.... 

That pissed me off more than I cared to admit. It also scared me because I think maybe she was right. There is a crack and she put it there.  

By taking my daughter. 

That crack can be mended with time. I am still reeling from the kidnapping and the death of Quinn's father. I think I used the funeral planning to distract myself from the rage I was feeling.  

Yes, Grace is home safe, but so many things could have gone wrong that day. When Quinn left the penthouse to get her back, I was relieved. I knew he would get her back safely, but I was still angry that she was taken in the first place. 

His relationship with Dionne was why my child was abducted from her school. A place where she should have been safe. Yet no one was even aware that she was missing.  

I sent emails to the school’s administration about it during the week while helping plan a funeral. It was a scathing tirade and made me feel a little better after I hit send. No one has reached out to me so far but they will before I am done with them. 

“Annie?” 

Quinn’s voice snaps me out of my thoughts. I look up at him from where I am sitting on a lounger out on the balcony off of our bedroom. I have been up here since we got home after picking Grace up from my parents.  

I needed alone time after today's events. I was a little manic after we left Dr. Moreno’s office. It boiled over when Quinn pulled over on the side of the road. The sex was wild and frantic. I needed to feel him in a primal way. 

Finding out I am not pregnant flipped a switch in my brain that I hadn’t expected. The dream of another baby has been in the back of my mind for years now. With Quinn back in my life that dream can finally happen.  

With him. 

I was hoping that missing my period for the first time in years would be the start of that future with the love of my life.  

“Where is Grace?” I ask him. 

“She is doing her homework in the living room. There is a documentary she has to watch, so I set her up in the living room with some popcorn.” 

I nod and gaze back at the skyline.  

Quinn’s shadow falls over me as he stops next to the lounger. He motions me to sit up so I can move forward a bit. He slides in behind me and pulls me back against him. I let out a sigh as his arms wrap around my waist. 

“What is on your mind?” He asks. “Other than the baby stuff.” 

“Touchy subject?” 

“No, but I know something else is bothering you,” he says as he grabs one of my hands and interlocks our fingers. 

I sigh and lean my head against his chest. 

“We agreed not to talk about her anymore.” 

His chest rises and falls with his sigh. “We did but if that is what is bothering you then we need to talk about it so it stops being that weight on us. We need to stop giving her the power to hurt us.” 

I nod my head then remove his hands from my waist so I can stand up. Talking about Dionne Masters makes me angry. I want to be standing for this conversation. 

“What she said today was just to get under your skin.” 

“It worked but not just today. She has been like an infected thorn in my side since she showed up here that first morning I stayed here with you. I saw what she did to you in the doorway. Her hand was down your pants. That pissed me off later when you told me who she was to you in the past.” 

I turn around to face him. His face shows surprise but his eyes are filled with anger. Good, I want him as angry as I am. As angry as I have felt for a while now. 

“We had just fucked on the counter and then she had her hand down your pants. Do you know how that made me feel?” 

“Disgusted? That is how I felt,” he tells me as he shakes his head.  

“I felt that after you told me who she was and what she did to you. Before that I felt ashamed. I had no idea who she was to you and I felt like the other woman. The mistress.” 

“Oh, Annie. Why didn’t you tell me this before? How much have you held back? How much damage have I done to you by bringing Dionne into your life?”  

Quinn rakes a hand through his hair then stands up from the lounger and walks towards me. There is hurt in his eyes but his jaw is clenched in anger. Both of those emotions I understand but I refuse to do anything about the first one right now. 

“I have been understanding from the beginning because I know everything you have told me is the truth. You have never been able to lie to me. It is in your eyes how much you love me. I believe it. That doesn’t mean that I haven’t been hurt and angry too.” 

“Then why didn’t you say anything? Why did you keep it hidden until now?” 

“That bitch kidnapping my daughter was the tipping point that cracked our relationship. It was already dented and bruised but that was it. Today I figured it out after talking to Dionne.” 

“I see. Your daughter.” Quinn stops walking towards me. All the emotions in his eyes fade away as he stares at me with a blank expression. 

“You know what I mean, Quinn.” I take a step towards him but he holds up his hand to stop my advancement. 

“I get that you are angry about everything that has happened because of Dionne. I even understand the stress we both feel because of it. However, since we made things official between us, I have been upfront and honest about everything. It seems that you have not given me the same curtesy.” 

That isn’t fair but it is the truth. 

“I have been honest with you about my feelings for you and what I want for our future.” 

“Yet, you kept all the anger inside instead of talking it out and letting it go. Then, when it comes down to it, Grace is still just your daughter. She will never be our daughter.” 

It is an old habit I fall back on when I am angry. 

“Quinn, that isn’t true.” 

“Every time you are mad at me or angry at a situation that involves Grace, she is just your daughter. Old habit, I get it. I am tired of being the afterthought parent to you. She is OUR daughter, Annie. It may be an old habit to you, but every time you say your daughter instead of our daughter to me, it feels like you are slapping me in the face with all those missing years.” 

“I don’t even mean it like that.” 

“There isn’t anything I can do about the past and you are entitled to your anger about Dionne’s part in all our stress levels. Process it all how you need to and know she is heading to prison. I would appreciate full honesty from here on out.” 

He turns away from me and walks towards the bedroom. All my anger fades as I watch Quinn walk away. I stay where I am because I don’t want to fight. None of this was his fault. 

Not really. 

It was all Dionne. 

I let her get to me even though I knew better. 

The crazy bitch is in jail and my family is safe. So, I will let it all go. She has no power over me anymore. 

I take a deep breath then walk into the bedroom to talk to Quinn. He isn’t in the bedroom or bathroom so I figure he is downstairs with Grace. To give us both more time to cool down, I grab a change of clothes and then take a shower. 

When I walk into the living room, I see Grace sitting on a couch with her notebook on her lap. I glance towards the kitchen but the lights are off. I turn from the living room and head towards Quinn’s office. 

I knock on the door then open it after a few moments of no response. He isn’t there either. Did he leave the penthouse to give me space? It is a huge multi-level penthouse. There is plenty of space. Where would he go? 

The gym.  

Of course. 

I go to the gym only to find it empty. 

“Grace, have you seen your father?” I ask her as I walk back into the living room. 

“He came down a few minutes ago, grabbed his keys, then left. Is he planning to get dinner?” Grace says as she turns to look at me. 

“No, I think he had something to do at the office. I am sure he will return soon.” 

She nods her head then turns back to the TV. I go back upstairs to grab my phone so I can call him. When I do, I hear his phone ringing in the closet. I found his phone in the pocket of the suit jacket he wore today. 

Three hours later I am curled up in bed with a book and a glass of wine. After I found Quinn’s phone, I headed downstairs to make dinner. We watched a movie while eating pizza on the living room floor. Once Grace went to bed, I cleaned up and then decided to try to relax with a book. 

The book has been laying open on my lap for the last thirty minutes. I read a chapter then laid it down as I zoned out. My mind is a mess. This is the first time Quinn walked away from me in anger. I am not sure how to handle things when he comes home. 

I know I have been all over the place emotionally today. If I were pregnant, I would blame hormones. Sadly, I have no one to blame but myself. 

I should have been open and honest with him about all the anger I have kept inside me. Instead of picking a fight I should have just gone down to the gym to work out my frustrations on a punching bag. Now I am alone in our big ass bed and have no idea where my fiancé is. 

A noise in the bedroom jolts me awake. I must have fallen asleep while waiting for Quinn to return. I open my eyes and Quinn is leaning against the dresser. His back is to me and his hands are spread out across the flat surface. His head is down so I can’t see it in the mirror reflection. 

“Quinn?” 

He doesn’t answer me. Instead, he opens a drawer then grabs a pair of sleep pants and walks to the bathroom. The door closes behind him which lets me know he is still mad because he rarely closes the door when he changes or showers. 

I put my book on the bedside table and then put my back against the headboard. He smells like alcohol, and that pisses me off. Where did he end up? 

When he comes out of the bathroom, he is towel drying his hair. He walks straight to the closet to toss his towel in the hamper. Never does he look at me.  

“Where did you go, Quinn?” 

“Are you asking because you think I went out, got drunk, then cheated on you?” 

“Actually, no. You left your phone so I had no idea where you were.” 

“Oh, you had ideas, I am sure.” 

“I am sorry for lashing out earlier. I have been a tad overwhelmed and it just exploded today.” 

He spins around to look at me. “You are not the only one dealing with this bullshit. Bottling it up solves nothing. If we can’t talk to each other about shit like this, then what do we do? Keep our problems bottled up until we bicker constantly?" 

“We are stronger than that and I let the events of today get to me more than I thought. I am sorry.” 

“If that was the only problem, I wouldn’t be as mad as I am.” 

“Oh, Quinn. It is reflexive to call her my daughter. I don’t mean to shut you out or slap you in the face with those missing years. Years you missed because of me.” 

Without saying another word, he leaves the bedroom and closes the door behind him. Our first major fight went horribly wrong. I hurt him unintentionally and I have no way to fix it.